"Write!" Said Fred
January 22, 2015 It's handwriting analysis week, minions, so I'm here to demonstrate this fascinating science.
What does your baker's work say about them? Let's find out!
;)
- Passive-aggressive
;)
- Uses "jazz hands"
;)
- Writes erotic Zombie fan-fic
;)
- Cries during yogurt commercials
;)
- twerks
;)
- Collects spores, molds, and fungus
;)
- Has to pee
;)
- Pushes ALL the elevator floor buttons
;)
- Gym grunter
;)
- Conspiracy theorist
;)
- Magician
Hope this helps you see those wrecks in a whole new light, minions! And remember: an upward slanting signature with extra long loopy bits means you have excellent taste in websites, so congrats on that.
Thanks to Kate M., Jill S., Johnny E., Sara G., Sarah S., Kelly D., David F., Jasmine K., Lacey C., Jenny H., & Shelly D., who are all too sexy for my party.
*****
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Reader Comments (46)
What's up with the turdish swirlies on the Toy Story cake?
It took me a moment to realize what was going on with the Toy Story cake - but actually, I approve. It kind of makes sense, and it looks a lot better than wiping out a big splotch.
Does the 'gym grunter' cake even have actual words on it??
My favorite was the "Happy BPA Frnk"
Wow. That's some really bad writing. AND decorating.
Spot on captions.
Forget the swirlies; how did s/he get the writing to levitate?
Q: What does it mean if you have a floating greeting that leaves a shadow on your cake?
A: It means you should have asked Woody to relieve himself in the toy box, like regular toy cowboys.
=^e.e^=
Spot-on analysis. You should take up handwriting analysis as a profession.
Gotta admit, a couple of them are rather creative - sprinkles on top of the lettering, lettering that levitates though doesn't quite distract from the abovementioned poo swirls . . .
This post is one of my faves in a while, just because the captions capture the look of the writing on the cake perfectly!
Personally, I'd feel HONORED to have Egon decorate a cake for me. :)
Yikes!!
Those little brown blobs on the Toy Story cake are holding up the clear plastic that the Happy Birthday is written on, but I'm not sure about the long brown coil. Maybe a lariat?
The rest of these just make me speechless...
I think the handwriting on the third cake down says that they will be looking for a new job very soon.
How did you figure out what all that writing means about the bakers???
And here I thought for sure one of the captions would suggest the decorator see a doctor about his Parkinson's.
@KAYK: For some reason (I'm not entirely certain why), this decorator decided to write the greeting on a clear plastic plaque, which is then held up by the swirlies. Interesting choice. Perhaps he/she didn't have room for the writing with all that flotsam in the way...?
Wreck 3 means that Tina left the burger business to work with cakes .
It looks as if Woodie was chained to the cake and left to die...
Still better than most of the doctors I see O_o
Cursive writing is a lost art. Obviously... o.O
@SaraCVT ~ Thanks for clearing up that bit of magic. I was to distracted by the poo swirls to notice the telltale shimmer of plastic on the corner!
In other news, the baby shower last weekend was a huge success! The cake AND the CCC were perfect! My baker\decorator did made the CCC into The Very Hungry Caterpillar! Genius! I'll try and figure out how to get a link to some pictures for you guys to see. It was amazing!
For some reason, I thought the fifth cake said "Happy Birthday Geronimo". Imagine my embarrassment to find it actually says "Grandma".
Good laughs today.
The 10th cake is magic too! All the balloons are floating upside down!
The loopy brown thing on the Toy Story cake is obviously an unfinished phallus. "Oh, you meant THAT Woody! I'll just cover up the wrong one with some writing and clear plastic. No one will ever know."
All I can say is thank heavens you can't see any handwriting in the comments… ;-)
So...what does this have to do with Right Said Fred or "I'm Too Sexy"?
So Egon inscribed Mary Stacy's cake? Ghost busting must not pay what it used to.
So on the toy story cake - I work at a store that makes cakes, Disney makes the pictures that have to be copied exactly -- I agree its dumb - it supposed to be a rope and the piles of poo were supposed to be made with a grass tip and they are tumbleweeds. LOL -- sometimes the copyright is so dumb -and the decorators cant figure out how to make it look like that. oh well ce la vie.
I lost it at "Cries during yogurt commercials".
The deflated balloons on the "Hopy Barbday Jessica" cake remind me of Tom Brady for some reason.
I'll see your Tina of "Bob's Burgers" and raise you an Egon of "Ghostbusters"...
I giggled at "jazz hands," laughed at "cries at yoghurt commercials," starting guffawing alarmingly at "has to pee" and completely lost it at "pushes all elevator buttons."
*wiping tears of laughter from face*
You guys are hilarious. Thanks.
As the daughter of an English teacher and the mother of a writing director, I have to point out that the nature collector baker was gathering multiple items (spores and molds) but only a single fungus. To keep the number agreements copacetic, it needs to be "fungi. Then you get all the fun of saying/writing it out as "fun-guy". Too pedantic? probably....It's all completely High-Larry-Us!!!
Bob's burger, Harry potter and flight of the conchords. There are more reasons I like this site than just cake mistakes!
I am still convinced that most of these were professionally made cakes and then the customer wrote on them.
"Happy Birthday Grandma" looks almost like it was piped by Great-Grandma....
Cake #2 gets bonus wreck points for spelling it "birthay." Not sure how many points to award for the name, though. Is it Paul all jazzed up? Paula but the wreckerator got tired and didn't finish? Sadly, we may never know.
@ginger: They don't LOOK like tumbleweeds...
Was that third cake written in blood?
The fifth probably *twerks while writing on cakes*
Wow, such baaaaad handwritings, a doctor would be jealous!
Woody is trapped by the advancing poo-monster snake ("there's a snake on my boot!") and poor Buzz is drowning in a river of overly blue frosting. Think of all the blue mouths that side of the cake will produce!
Lmao!! At least we can sort of read what the wreckerators wrote. Maybe they got handwriting lessons from their doctors. Sheesh.
Funniest anything I have seen in a very long time.
The gym grunter cake says “Happy Eappy!”
I'm way behind in Wrecky reading. Just saw this one and loved it, from the title all the way through. So many laughs. Thank you for bringing joy to my day!
I have to say thanks to you for giving me some perspective when it comes to messed-up cakes. A couple of years ago I picked up a grocery store cake for my son's birthday and the writing looked like a first grader had done it. Instead of being a b*tch about it and getting mad at the bakery worker who barely spoke English, I just smiled and thought "Cake Wreck" and took it home. We had a nice laugh over it and a nice birthday party for my son!
@ Tammy -- I admire you and your restraint! I'm in a culinary school and am learning to make display cakes, and I do have to say that I still am far from being satisfied with my piping words on cakes. Hopefully, if I did it several times a day, I'd get the hang of it...but who knows?