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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
May232014

It's Getting Hot In Here...

Today is Heat Awareness Day, so pay attention; this is important.

It's hot.*

*Not applicable in the majority of the North Eastern United States. Or the North Western parts. Or Canada. Or England. Or Australia. Or really anywhere else that isn't Florida right now.

And now, let us sing our traditional Heat Awareness Day song!

 

The heat is on!

 

The heat is o -- hon!

[guitar riff] Nanananana. Nananana. Na. Na.

 

The heat is on!

Nanananana. Nananana. Na. Na.

 

The heat is o -- hon!

Nanananana. Nananana. Na. Na.

 

Tell me can you feel it?

 

Tell me can you feel it?

 

TELL ME CAN YOU FEEL IT???

"Oh, I can feel it."

 

Well alrighty then.

 

Thanks to Julia K., Mary D., Meghan H., Miriam S., Richard B., M.R., & Amanda for keeping it hot, hot, hot.

*****

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Reader Comments (65)

I dunno, I just can't feel it...

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

That last one looks like a Veggi-phobe set fire to a broccoli patch

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterShirley Fowley

The "turkey" looks like one of those creatures from "Operation Annihilate," eating two ice cream cones. Now I feel bad. I thought they were vicious parasites bent on world domination, and they just wanted some Baskin Robbins.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

HEE!! Totally heard the last part in Kronk's voice. Those leaky carrots/fingers/whatevers are creepy

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda H.

Does anyone else think the carrots on cake 4 look like stubby over spray tanned big toes with excessive green toe jam?

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKimberJ

O, the insidiousness of global warming....cakes! CAKES! Is nothing safe....?

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermel

"It's hot.*

*Not applicable in the majority of the North Eastern United States. Or the North Western parts. Or Canada. Or England. Or Australia. Or really anywhere else that isn't Florida right now."

I submit to you the temperature where I live in the province of Tarlac, in the Philippines. Tomorrow's high will be 93, but with humidity factored in, it will feel like 103. This has been a daily occurrence for the entire Philippine summer, since mid-March. Thank God, this is my last summer here before I go home to SoCal where it can get up to 115, but there's no humidity.

So, you know, it's not only in Florida. ;)

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterspidey

The only thing I can think of when looking at the melting carrot fingers is, they wrecked this cake so badly that they forgot the melting jockeys!

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCheryl

Gooey cake puddle
Ugly and inedible
What a sticky mess

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

It's hot in Arkansas too! We could definitely melt some cakes here.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKristen

Why is the deer always surrounded by fire? Does Bambi really need to relive that over and over and over again?

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

Oh, I feel it alright. I feel my breakfast coming back up. Hrk.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

Oh, I feel it. Now I have to go watch that movie AGAIN! Thanks john (thoJ)!

Things are melting here in the Pacific Northwest, because they're getting wet! Of course it's a big celebration weekend in my town this weekend complete with a parade. Hey, if it rains maybe I won't have to go! WOOT!

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

Oh no!
The naked baby mohawk carrot jockeys have been vaporized!
Anybody want to play me in chinese checkers with #1?

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJackwire

I dont even want to say it...but a lot of those are just airbrush bleed and not heat related.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterfarrell

Yeah, I was in Disney last week. It is definitely hot.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

A normal day in Texas,

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAllegra

That turkey...why D: i'd still eat the rest :P

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

3 of Oklahoma's seasons are "almost summer", "summer", and "still summer". The other seasons are "football", "hunting", and "tornado".

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKim

What's wrong with the deer cake ? Is he on fire or in a fall festive forest ?

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTracy

I've heard this song, it's in the intro of Beverly Hills Cop

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBeargirl

Here in Indy it's darn hot too. As is the tradition for the Indy 500 race weekend. Hot and muggy. Although I think when you said it's "Heat Awareness Day," you meant "Pacer Awareness Day" ;)

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMoon Dawg

What is that first cake supposed to represent, anyway? Multi-colored chicken pox?

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

#6 - Instead of playing The Floor Is Lava, let's play The Cake Is Lava! It's loads of fun!

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMoe

The fifth one wasn't so wrecky until the heat made it so, which is a shame. The other cakes were just trying to put them selves out of their own misery by melting. But the last one...I was staring at it trying to figure out just what it was supposed to be, then I SAW IT!! The HORRIBLE looking deer head staring out calmly from the...er... flames?? Why??? Who on earth would want to celebrate a forest fire? *shudder*

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSweet Li'l Bonbon

Can I just say: ARIZONA?!! Where we're having a "cool spell" 'cause it's below 90? I've lived in Atlanta, Tampa and Williamsburg (Virginia), so I know humidity. But IT'S A DRY HEAT here - just like your oven! Yeah, we've got heat awareness here!

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterchmgirl

@ Sharyn!

Greeghoooo! Greeghoooo! Greeghoooo! Greeghoooo!

So the turkey makes you think of the creatures for Operation: Annihilate! Well everyone watch your backs and hope Leonard Nimoy is nearby in order to end the horrible cake menace! Beware of all flapjacks, pancakes and dinner plates until you know everything is safe!

I AM VULCAN! THERE IS NO PAIN!!!!!

Greeghoooo! Greeghoooo! Greeghoooo! Greeghoooo!

Oh and be sure to wear your best pair of shades!

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterIsolder74

Usually the wrecks make me happy. But those melting carrots are just so sad...

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKathy

Ummmm.....can't always blame a melted cake on the maker (as in the Baskin Robbins ice cream turkey cake.) I still have people grab an ice cream cake out of the freezer, then say, "I can keep this in the refrigerator, right?" Those are the few that ask--I wonder about those who don't. My response is normally, "if that's where you keep your ice cream."

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDebbie

The "whipped topping" one looks strangely like chinese checkers!

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

Oh, my! Of course, I'm trying to figure out how to keep a Jello mold in one piece for a picnic tomorrow in Tennessee. At least it will be a cooler day than the rest of the week, just 83 instead of 90.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

Cake #3 - Hmmm. I think there's a cream that would clear that right up.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSaraV

I am in the Not-Florida state of South Carolina and it is hot and muggy here, kinda Florida-ish. I guess Heat Awareness Day this year means people in the Not-Florida states making you aware of the heat where they live.

The, erm, "carrots" might want to see a doctor. That looks really infected! The doctor will probably prescribe an antibiotic and be sure to take all of it or we'll end up with superbugs which cause global warming and make cakes melt. Or something. I get all my news from Twitter but I don't bother to click the links.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterpikkewyntjie

It's pretty warm here too in Pennsylvania. Not as warm as yesterday before the hail came through. But it's still upper 70s, It was in the 80s yesterday.
Just before reading this, I actually just heard that song by coincidence. lol

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterIvy

I too am in the not-Florida state of South Carolina-which feels a whole lot like the state of Florida this week!!!!At least when I lived in Florida we had a sea breeze most of the time time...either that or it didn't feel as hot because I was a lot younger then.....*sigh*...the good old days.......

Melty cakes
for goodness sakes
ice them!!!!

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterWildDuck

I am in Central Canada - and yes! It is hot here on the prairies today too! Hottest day of the year so far! I believe about 82 Fahrenheit, or 30 Celsius!

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCarlene

Now that last cake is not a wreck, it is obviously a tribute to the movie Bambi. See how Bambi's father is standing so still (like marble!), nostrils flared, eyes glinting in the light of the forest fire. So brave! You can almost hear him telling young Bambi to get up and face his fears. This is a cake worthy of any child's birthday party.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDegera

I'm up in far northwest Texas and we're in the 60s and wet. Yesterday was in the low 70s and wet. And tomorrow is supposed to be the low 70s and wet. Did I mention that it's wet? And the turkey cake is why I don't do ice cream cakes.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTXRed

It's actually pretty warm where I live in western Canada; +24 at the moment (Celcius, which is like 75ish in F) - pretty good for here considering it was snowing last weekend.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDNA

Thank you cake wrecks. I start the day with a really good laugh.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterGrandma

Nope. Still not feelin' it.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

When I saw the title and Heat Awareness Day, I thought, yep, has to be Florida, where I live. And then I saw the first cake. It's not a wreck at all: Clearly, this is a three-species (Smurf, Vulcan, human) celebration of something that goes hand in, er, hand with summertime (all six months of it) in Florida: heat rash. I hope they serve it with a nice tall glass of calamine lotion.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterZeldabird

Speaking on behalf of a small portion of Canada it is definitely hot here today! 30 degrees Celsius, so about 86 for those of you who speak Fahrenheit. Tonight I shall need someone to hold me when I have nightmares of carrot-fingers trying to attack...

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAnn Onymouse

Also in Australia it is unseasonalby warm still we are about to hit winter but it is still in Mid twenty celsius weather in Sydney anyway (do not ask me faranheit cause I would not have a clue).

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth

Definitely seasonally warm here in Melbourne, Australia (as opposed to Melbourne, Florida). In fact, we're are at the tail end of the hottest May on record... and winter starts next weekend. http://www.smh.com.au/environment/weather/its-official-may-2014-tops-the-heat-charts-20140520-38lar.html

I still can't figure out what the first one is supposed to be. A petri dish? Mutant 7-sided snowflakes? Ignoring the blue running, I will say that the each colour looked at separately is quite okay (the dots are nice and consistenlty sized and spaced) but the OCD part of me wants the blue section to move back out of the middle, dammit, and give the others their personal space.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAnne

It's pretty bad when you can't even guess what the original looked like!

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRadiofiesta

Yeah… Apparently it's supposed to be spring, but I live in Hokkaido, so right now it is 12˙C… Today we have a maximum of 15˚C. That's 59˚F. So it's really not getting hot in here. Haha.

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRoz Harris

Am I the only one who sees the similarity between the melted carrots and the white "balloons" from the previous post?

May 23, 2014 | Unregistered Commentertracylee

Those poor carrots. I think the jockeys melted right off of them lol. Sheesh. And that turkey ice cream cake really must have been left out too long. Wow.

May 24, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

I gotta believe blue squiggle #2 (aka baby boy cake) also started life as an ice cream cake. If that were frosting, it would have to be hades-level hot to get that much spread.

And you people with your 30 degrees Celsius, pshaw! You don't know from hot. Come on down to Texas. I'll reserve you a spot for August 15. It'll be about 100F/38C with 90% humidity. The CAKE will be melting.

May 24, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAngelaS

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