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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Apr122013

Cake Talk

Sometimes cakes can tell their own story. 


 Oooh. Now that's cold.

 

Thanks to Ally H., Jessica P., Wendy R., Megan M., Sierra Z., & Tori B. for the reminder to always be nice to mom. ALWAYS.

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Reader Comments (91)

#3 What's with the question mark? "It's okay, Jesus loves adopted children too!?" Is the sender not sure of the statement?

So the recipient just found out that they were brought by a different stork, but they didn't hear it from Mom & Dad. And this is how we make it all better. **facedesk**

Yet another legitimate reason for disliking purple dinosaurs.

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Now everyone who sees this post just lost the game. Thanks guys. :-)

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAlison

I like how the word "vomit" is all smear-y.

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKore

Wow, yeah, the dinosaur one is kind of condescending. *sigh* "All right, we love you too, even though you're adopted! All right already?"

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPaula

Does nobody else think the adopted cake might be kind of a joke seeing as dinosaurs and Jesus don't really go together?

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBunnys hop

As an adoptive mom, and a long time reader love the cakes- appauled at the dino cake and foolish statements like this poster:"" ....... a metaphor for how messed up adopted kids can be. Maybe Jesus loves them out of pity. Or maybe they're only damaged after they receive this cake""

Kind of a wreck for even saying that ,,,,,shame on you
not funny at all

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJeanne

Is there something seriously wrong with me that the frowny face cake actually cheers me up?

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSilverRain

I thought the Dino cake was a really bad Barney reference. Could be just me...I hate Barney! But, purple dinosaur aside, my 2 adopted girls would look at that cake and be completely dumbfounded only to follow with indignation...loudly.

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDebbie

I am also assuming (hoping) that the dinosaur cake is a joke. As for what's around its neck--some sick headphones, brah! Beats by Dr. Dre, maybe.

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

i definitely remember singing "jesus loves the little children, all the children of the world". it does not seem necessary to put jesus also loves the adopted children on a cake - as though adopted children are less than biological children - and i am neither adopted nor an adopter. it just upset me. i hope the child that it was made for is too young to read.

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterjane lewis

Haiku Joy, I wish I had your brain!

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

The dino looks to me like a cross between a dinosaur and a frog.

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNight Owl

I personally am shocked over the dino/adopted cake. What a horrible cake to make (and to give)! Maybe I'm over sensitive. We adopted our son. And there is no shame in him being adopted. The only shame is the person who thought this cake up!

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKrystil H

The standard response to cakes like the last one, and by extension to pictures of them, is "you bastard."

For Portal References, I suppose we need an Epimenides Paradox cake.

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterkhereva

I'm pretty sure that The Game was a reference to this: http://www.losethegame.com/ In which case, well done, random mom!

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterG

I was REALLY concerned by the question mark at the end of the "Jesus still loves adopted kids." What a traumatizing cake!

"Sweetie, we have something to tell you, but we feel the tone is best left ambiguous so you can draw your own conclusion. But it comes with a dinosaur! They're your favorite, right? Your biological parents couldn't clarify that for us while you were still in vitro."

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGenette

SuBee wins the internet today! Sorry @Sharyn!

Now that I've had a cup of coffee (or 7) and my eyes are fully open (I can see sounds!) like everyone else I am more disturbed by that dumb purple dinasour cake. That has to be a joke, right? Please tell me it's a sick joke. Because if it's not, well... that's just mean.

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

A POX upon that last cake! I was doing so well! I hadn't thought about The Game in over a year. Now I have to start all over again.

Thanks a lot. -_-

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAshley P

@mindy1 - uhh...I think you meant me when you were telling Fluffy Cow that you were glad she didn't let her dad get her down... (and thank you!! I went on to get *two* degrees! Take that, dad! :-)

@Craig - "...*another* reason to hate purple dinosaurs..." (Hear that?! It's the sound of anti-Barney parents everywhere going, "Heck, YEAH!!!!!"! :-)

And I don't know the backstory for the Remorse cake, but I know an incident that would fit. Hubby's boss invited him & co-workers for a nice boat ride 'round the bay. As we were getting on, one wife noticed that her hubby was wearing the top-notch diamond Rolex she had given him for their anniversary. She asked him not to wear it & he said something like "Why? We're not fishing or anything. And it's waterproof if a wave splashes me." So she *reluctantly* agreed. Well, on the way back in, just minutes from the dock after our 3-hour tour, he's heading for the bow of the boat, and smacks his wrist on a handrail. The clasp pops open & the watch promptly falls 'into the drink' (i.e. the bay) before he or any of us can do anything. The wife remained quiet but you could tell she was seething. We all had heard the original exchange, so we knew he was *really* gonna get it when they got home. I can just see him buying a cake like this in an effort to appease his wife and/or acknowledge that he should have heeded her advice, given it was such an expensive watch!

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

I see nothing wrong with the "adopted children" cake... except it ends with an interrobang instead of two exclamation points? Well, we THINK he loves you too! Probably...!

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTaylor P

SuBee, I agree with Sarah V, you win!! (Sorry Sharyn and Haiku Joy)

That dino cake is very disturbing. If that's the apology, I can't even begin to imagine just how awful was the comment that prompted it. Poor kids!

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNancy

On the adoption cake, I kinda get it. I was adopted myself, and when I first found out about it, I felt like a freak. My guess is that its suppose to be comforting for the kid- probably a young boy, if the dinosaur is anything to go by. Trust me, when you're adopted, it can feel like no one loves you (as an early and hard to resolve question is 'why did my parents give me up?'). Out of context though... it is a very odd cake.

Love the How Dare you cake... my guess, a girl found out her BF was cheating on her (thus, dead flowers).

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterWildstar

Oh, snap. My son's birthday is today! If only I'd seen 'The Game' cake earlier!

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered Commentercal

I also thought the dinosaur cake might be an attempt to reassure an adopted kid, rather than mean (except for the question mark...). What is more disturbing is that the "goiters" look like eyes...as if someone thought the first head/face didn't look good enough, and added a second dino head on top, leaving the original eyes to look like goiters or earphones!

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterjulia

So maybe telling my friends to check out CW wasn't such a good idea, I got a message today that said "I think you should have given me a cake I think you really still owe me a cake" Sadly, she's probably right. Hey, it wasn't entirely MY fault that she ordered me the strongest drink I've ever had in my entire life on my birthday! And it wasn't MY fault that her house only had one bathroom...upstairs! Ok, so maybe flipping the cushions over after I lost everything I had ever eaten in my entire life up to that point wasn't the best idea. And quite possibly losing the rest of it on the other side wasn't the best either. But at least I helped her move 3 weeks later and we left the nasty couch for the stupid ex-boyfriend to deal with! That makes up for some of it, right?

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

@SuBee, you are so brilliant!

It's hard to tell without a close-up, but is the dinosaur holding a radio in its mouth? You know, like a boom box, and the round things are the speakers? That's just my guess, which does absolutely nothing to explain why the cake's message is so rude.

April 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

I wonder, out of all the people who think the religiousaurus adoption cake is serious, how many had older siblings or cousins? For the longest time, I thought having a cruel older relative tell you that you were adopted (especially if it's not true) was a standard part of growing up.

Also, that's not a question mark; it's a single hair growing out of his butt. Every week or so, it catches his attention and he notices how long it's gotten, but there's not a thing he can do about it.

April 13, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

Wow. Remorse cake apparently is a lovely bright yellow so that no one can miss it in the dark lol. I have no words for that dinosaur cake. Love that first one though. At least the neighbors are nice enough to buy you a cake.

April 13, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Darn it! I was winning the game for so long!

April 13, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSara

I thouht the writing on the dinosaur cake was odd, then thought maybe some little brat told an adopted kid that Jesus didn't love him/her so the cake was to cheer the kid up. That would be why there's an exclamation point after Okay, as in don't worry about it.
If it's not then whoever thought that up should be smacked.

April 13, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLinda

At the risk of adding to the epcot... and to those who have been adopted.

My brother was adopted. When we were little he would get " well you are adopted". My aunt stopped it one day by giving him the ammo "I was adopted; I was chosen. You just happened."

*heading to the bunker*

April 13, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEla

1.) I'm pretty sure the word vomit should never ever never be on a cake.
2.) I can think of a lot of reasons for the "how dare you" cake. For example: My best friend decides to move away and I'm hosting the going away party.
3.) Like Mary Poppins said, "just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down!" Well, with something as big as remorse you need a whole cake. "Just remember, Monica, food is not love."
4.) My sister and I always used to tease my brother that he was adopted. This would have been perfect!
5.) I hate that d@mn smiley face anyway!
6.) A true lesson in not living in denial. Thanks Mom!

April 13, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSandy

WHAT ARE THOSE BLOBBULES ON THE DINOSAUR'S NECK?????

April 13, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterdolphin

Does the dinosaur have lymph node problems?

April 13, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterChez

@bunnys hop: Who says Jesus and dinosaursdon’t go together?

April 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNagzilla

As an adoptive mom, I'm horrified by the dinosaur cake, and cheered that my horror is shared by so many others. Thanks guys!

My teen daughters would love "the game" cake. Actually, they'd be soooo mad if I served that to them. Ha! I'll have to remember that for their next birthday.

April 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAggiedog

Keeping my fingers crossed for the backstory on the dino cake ... let it be an "inside" joke that was loved by all ... and not a back-sided comment about adopted children not being "real" kids!!

April 15, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTiaHillary

@Whitney, I just died laughing reading your comments. Almost literally. I am completely baffled by what a dinosaur with a thyroid problem has to do with Jesus loving adopted children. And which of those things makes that cake wreckier? The fact that the dinosaur has some kind of disease (which is totally the wreckerator's fault) or the saying (which was probably created by the customer)?

April 15, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTiffany

Since I refuse to think that some mom would actually give their kid a cake about losing some type of sports game, I prefer to think instead that, like me, she has a child that runs around randomly shouting "I lost the game!" (two of them in fact) in which the game is not to think about the game, and if you think about the game, then you have lost the game. Otherwise, fail, Mom. Fail.

(and as I typed this my 13yo just complained that I made him lose the game by showing him this post).

May 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAmyH.

Am I the only one that thinks of Rocko's Modern Life with the "How dare you" cake?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJjveSgAJrc

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSeth

Gah! I LOST!

I wish I took a picture of the cake some teenagers bought just to eat at Dairy Queen a few years ago. They picked one with a smiling dolphin on it, and were excited when we said we'd write on it for free. After a moment's deliberation, the gave us their request. They jut about died laughing when I delivered them a cake that said "Sorry about your abortion"!

June 19, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterarmedwithjello

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