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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Jun122009

Star Wars Weekend

Tomorrow John and I are going to the Star Wars Weekends out at Disney. This is the event that causes our friends who work at Disney - even the hardened sci-fi geeks - to go blank-faced with terror, so needless to say I'm pretty psyched about it. (Apparently we Trekkers have nothing on Star Wars fans in the crazy department.) So in honor of the occasion, and for those of you too distant/sane to attend, here's some Wreckage to get you in the intergalactic mood.

This fun little number features a puddle of R2D2 (or possibly an attempt at Captain America's shield?) in the upper left-hand corner, and a Ferengi Marauder in the lower right-hand corner. [head tilt] Huh.

Hey, uh, Wreckerators? It's probably not wise to cross the sci-fi/geekery streams. Especially the Trek/Wars streams. You never, ever want to do tha...

Oh no you di'n't, Matt B.!

(Ok, so Matt's friends Wrecked it on purpose. It's still funny, though.)


Come to the Dark Side. We have granite texture-in-a-can.

Plus, our storm troopers have huge...

Uh...

Goiters?


Yeah, let's go with goiters. No one knows what those are, anyway.


Bobble-headed Yoda you will love. Awesome is he:

His lack of legs, disturbing I find.

Little known fact: the first R2D2 prototype was made using only Styrofoam, blue painter's tape, and a Sharpie:

Plus, did you guys know that R2D2's birth name was Reginald Dillingham? It's true. I wouldn't lie to you. (Unless it was funny. Or I was bored. Or cake was involved. But this, this is true. Honest.)

And lastly, J. Williamson's local paper featured this as a "hot new trend" in weddings:

So naturally you're thinking, "Gee, Jen, people are serving Wolfman's head on a platter at weddings?"

(This is Wolfman, by the way:)


The answer, of course, is no - and I laugh in the face of your childish naivete. Hahahah! Ahhahaha! Mwaha. Ha. Aha.

Yes, as I was saying, the answer is no - because people are in fact serving Chewbacca's head on a platter at their weddings. That's Chewbacca. See the resemblance?

That's what I thought.

Debra B., Luci, Katie R., Brandi M., & Anony, when it comes to cake, use the forks.

Related Wreckage: Do These Taste Chewy To You?

NOTE: Today's post is dedicated to CW reader Jacob Taylor, since I hear he's a big Star Wars fan. Jacob is 8 years old and was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor last month, so he and his family could use all the good wishes, prayers, and warm thoughts you'd care to send their way. The good news is that he's responding well enough to radiation treatment that he's back to reading again this week. So, hi, Jacob! Say, you bakers in the Cincinnati Ohio area, how's about whipping him up some organic cake to celebrate? (He's on an all-natural diet these days.)

« Wreckie Grad Shows Us How It's Done | Main | Expressions of "Graditude" »

Reader Comments (141)

Crossing Star Wars and Star Trek isn't too bad... Well, unless your a Trek fan.

http://current.com/items/90029658_death-star-destroys-enterprise.htm

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAbby Normal

Hey Jacob! You sound like a strong and neat young man. Star Wars fans are the coolest (shhhh... don't tell the Trekkies!)

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I have had the Star Wars- Tribute to John Williams by Moosebutter stuck in my head (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lk5_OSsawz4) so your post today was especially amusing. (Kiss a Wookie, Kick a Droid . . .)

Thanks and May The Force Be With You Jacob. I'll be thinking of you!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLCBrisson

I thought the Chewbacca cake looked a little like The Thing from Fantastic Four.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermoonfall86

I guess that blue thing might be the Imperial symbol (although it ought to have six spokes), but that red thing is definitely a terrible miscarriage of the Alliance symbol from Star Wars.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

"Live Long and Proper" sounds like the title for a Vulcan etiquette handbook.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJordanBaker

That Darth head looks like the indoor-outdoor carpeting we use in our fair booth every year.

And since I am in the Relay for Life in a local city this year, I will be purchasing a Luminaria in honor of Jacob! I'll take a picture and send it to you to share with the family.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKaren in Hammond

Live long and Proper! Yeah, point that pinky out when you eat your cakewrecks. *g*

The Wolfman/Chewbacca was especially wrecktastic, but I have to give props for the R2D2. Better than I could do!

Re: the nautical themed cake...with added SW wreckiness. What do you bet that his thoughtful grandmother bought the cake, thinking that it looked appropriately boy-ish..and then when presented with his cake, the birthday boy howled, "I WANTED A STAR WARS CAKE!!!" To placate the little brat, his mom probably grabbed some SW figurines, stuck them on the cake and said "Look sweetie--see, now it is!"

Gosh, as a writer I could have a field day with the backstories for these wrecks! =D I'd write a book and dedicate it to you, Jen! =D

WV: Iralliz. Iralliz a shame how wrecky some of these are!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa (& Billy)

Huh. Knowing the comments are moderated, I'm sure someone else has said this before and it just isn't up yet, but... I think the first cake was made by a Canadian. That Rebel Alliance emblem looks an awful lot like it wants to be a maple leaf.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHan

Take care, Jacob! We're thinking of you!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I am now an even BIGGER Cake Wrecks fan!!!

Thank you for mentioning our buddy Jacob!
Mmmm ... organic cake!

Sending love to Tiff, Jacob, Nathan, Molly, and Sammy!!!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMonica and Grayson

Jacob- may you get better, be happy, and may all of your cakes never be wrecks. Love from DC.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLauren

Have fun at star wars weekend!
from experience, i know how terrifying it is!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJackie D

I kinda like the Yoda one... It's cute!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterD

Jen, I bow to your Trekkie-ness for seeing a Ferengi Marauder. Once you said it, I could see it, but I don't think I would have come up with the comparison on my own. Apparently it has been too long since I've spent any meaningful amount of time with Ferengi. Sad.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFyrefrog

That Chewbacca cake looks like a big terd with a face...ich.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

How appropriate today's theme is! My 9-yr old son's birthday party is tonight complete with a Star Wars theme. Due to some copyright thing, the bakeries don't have the SW toppers right now (at least in Central TX). So, working together with the grocery story bakery, we have dreamed up a "spacey" background, onto which I will place a couple of SW figurines. I cross my fingers that wreckiness does not follow. I'll let you know how it goes.

Jen, I was at SW Weekend last year, and it was a blast! Have FUN!! Thanks for all the laughs!

Cheers!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

I have to admit I didn't read the other comments before posting this, so if someone else pointed it out, my bad. On the first cake, that is not a "puddle of R2-D2" or a Captain America shield. That is supposed to be the Empire's symbol.

By the way, I used to work for a sci-fi convention company. I've never had a Star Wars fan stop and run my ear off for an hour and a half as I awkwardly tried to escape just because I tried to be polite and took .2 seconds to compliment his or her t-shirt. But I have had that experience with several Trekkies.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Is it me, or is Yoda wearing a pink dress??

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDianne

the goiters are going to keep me laughing all day long...

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterT

The first one with the failed Galactic Empire logo (Melted R2-D2) and Rebel Alliance logo (discarded robe) is one of the officially licensed designs that Kroger offers in their flip book. The Wreckerator that made that had a nice detailed picture to copy those symbols from and they STILL got it horribly, horribly misshapen.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJames

My thoughts and prayers go out to Jacob and his family. Get better soon. There are alot of people rooting for you,including me. I'll be thinking about you. What a strong boy you must be to be fighting this. Keep fighting and stay strong.

Hi Jen,
I love your blog so much. I check it everyday and it always puts a smile on my face. I even introduced my sister to it. Keep up the good work and I can't wait for tomorrow's post.

Kate in New York

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKaitlin

We're all pulling for you Jacob!!! :)

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ok...the Vader cake looked like it was covered in flies...just saying... :-) Yoda...creepy, I would say. It looks like a converted toy Hulk hand...really tasty looking, if you're into foam!

Jacob, smiles and laughter will help get you through the rough stuff. Prayers and well-wishes from Iowa to you... :-)

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterphelpsgurl

That first one is actually Epcot.

Oh, wait...

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterD.B. Echo

I had NO FREAKIN clue it was Star Wars Weekend(s)! WOw, I may just see you there! Woo Hoo!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMoneyFunk

I had never before noticed the similarities between a poorly constructed symbol of the Rebel Alliance and...a Ferengi Marauder you say? Hmm. And yes, that's supposed to be the symbol of the Empire. No idea why it's blue...it does look a little like the top of R2's head.

Star Wars weekends are incredible. Last time I went I got to meet Warwick Davis and I don't think he was very excited when I told him I loved him in "Willow".

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterhello jessi!

Oh Darn... it at DisneyWorld not disney land. Wrong coast for me. Darn!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMoneyFunk

Hey Jacob! Our thoughts are with you!

These cakes, on the other hand, SUCK!

It appears to me the Storm Trooper dude has a Thyroid problem.

Perhaps Yoda just has a slight case of bone settling. Bones tend to do that as you age...Man, he must be OLD!!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTrish

Hi Jacob! My prayers to you and your family.

Live long and prosper, my friend.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSadi

Am I the only one that sees Hannibal Lecter in the face mask in the Chewy cake? His eyes are following me! And the Yoda one looks like it is made out of styrofoam.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKatie H

Hi Jacob! You're definitely in my thoughts...and here's hoping you DO get a wrecky cake. ;) Especially if it looks absurd and tastes great.

And hi to Jedi-Jacob!

May the force be with you both! And may you Live Long and Prosper!

I was disappointed about Disney until I realized it's the wrong coast for me too.

My word verification was mazedoe. And now I have that song from the 40s in my head. Which feels like the musical version of a wreck. Ack! http://www.duchessathome.com/childrensongs/mareseatoats.html

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEm

Haiku Joy said

"Live long and proper!"
could be wreckier. Just say
"Live long, you pooper!"

Ass off laughed I did.

Be well Jacob.

wv nonsatio....latin for insatiable need for cakewrecks

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHyena Overlord

Good luck Jacob!
May the force be with you!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChelsea

My 3 year old grandson is a Star Wars nut (induced by his equally Star Wars crazy uncle). He would love the Star Wars week-end at Disney World. He watches some of the events that are posted on YouTube and loves them. The whole family is hoping to take him there one day.

We are all jealous!~

Love your site Jen.I am continually amazed at the vastness of cake wrecks out there.

Jacob - Sending you lots of good thoughts!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLindalou

That stormtrooper must be taking Viagra while he's not fighting.

If I attempted to draw the symbols of the Rebel Alliance and the Imperials, it would definitely turn out like that first cake. As Yoda would say, "freehand drawing on cakes not good at it you are hmmm?"

The Darth Vader helmet cake looks like a goth version of the ghosts from the Pac Man game.

Jacob---may the force be with you!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBree

Yeah, Cake 1 is definitely Imperial and Rebellion insignia.
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Imperial_crest
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Alliance_Starbird
And in a lot of places you'll see the Imperial Crest as blue (like the one on the cake) which has always bugged me (since I like blue better than red, I think it should've been the other way around.) The starbird is a bit off, but that's a pretty minor offense, really (as compared to even some of the Sunday Sweets in the past).

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersallythetimid

Hi Jacob!! Prayers and much cake to you and your family!

Good cake, I mean. Not these weird things.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKMilt

Hi Jacob!! GET WELL SOON LIL BUDDY!! I want to see a celebratory cake wreck in your honor!!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Jacob - Live long and proper Buddy!!!! I hope you gets loads of yummy organic cakes!! xoxo

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The only one missing is the Boba Fett!! Fawesome!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterStalker v1.5

OMG, you never fail to leave me in stitches! Thanks for the laughs!
I've spread a little love your way -- http://teddystartedit.blogspot.com

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTeddy Started It

I live in Cinci! Any info in Jacob, so I can send him a card or something?

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

JACOB - your in my thoughts and prayers... keep smiling and laughing... laughing at cakewrecks is some of the best medicine!!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

LOL! Now I KNOW the first cake was wrecky--I thought it was a life preserver with ropes and an anchor, not the Rebel/Empire symbols!

I feel like a dork but hey, that's what I saw! =D

Yoda scares me. KILL IT WITH FIRE!

And a shout-out to Jacob! May you live long--but take time to be just a LITTLE improper sometimes. *g*

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa (& Billy)

Those were hilarious!

The Yoda cake is just brilliant!

Sending positive thoughts to Jacob and his family! Get well buddy!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRose

love the wrecks!

Is there somewhere to leave Jacob a message? I googled, but didn't fiind anything, except an 8 year old in London...

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commentergiantspeckledchihuahua

I tried to email you, but the link won't work.

Have fun at SWW! I know almost all of the marchers in the 501st that will be marching in the parade. My husband and I are a part of the group and we've marched quite a few of our own parades at SWW when we used to live in Florida :)

And as a SW fan (my husband more so then me) those cakes are awful! Very depressing!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Have fun at SWW. My husband and I went for weekend 1. And reassure your Disney castmember friends, this will be over soon.

Happy Birthday Jacob!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDizkneefan

Man, I could read posts like this every day, they make my geeky side (which, btw, is stronger than both the dark side and the light side combined) so very, very happy. I especially like when you talk like Yoda. So funny are you, Jen, rolled off the bed with laughter, I almost did.

As for Jacob: hi! You are one brave little kid and it's so cool that the younger generation also still loves Star Wars. I'm sending lots of well-wishes your way and I hope you get better real soon. The Force sure is strong with you, if you are already responding well to your current treatment. Also, keep reading CW, laughter is scientifically proven to be a great medicine and I guess anything that will help is welcome.
To Jacob's family: I wish you a lot of strength in this trying time. I'm sending you lots of good vibes over the ether of the net. Keep going on!

May the Force be with you, Jacob, always.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnna

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