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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Feb032009

Phony

I'm kind of a "if it ain't broke don't fix it" girl. Which is why, despite John's ridicule and the fact that it technically IS broken, I still use the first cell phone I ever got after we were married. Sure, it's older than most first graders, the camera no longer works, no headset on earth fits it, and it's dented in several places from my throwing it across the room while playing Psychonauts (love that game), but darn it all, I just figured out how the menu works.

Anyway, I mention all this because today I got a harsh reminder of just how old my phone is:

Yep, old enough to appear as a plastic toy on a Wreck.

And not just ANY Wreck, but one that's ugly as vomit-streaked sin and suffering from a severe identity crisis to boot. Is it a going-away cake? A birthday cake? Both? "Happy Birthday, Billy. Now Daddy and I gotta go! Bye!"

I could also mention the punctuation, spacing, and CCC issues, but really I just can't get over this phone-clone thing. In fact, I think I need to photograph my phone just to show you I'm not making this up. Check it out:

See? Of course, the fact that I wanted to show off my new Mickey Munny doll had nothing to do with it, Christina B. (But isn't he cute?)

« Tensed Up | Main | Wreck-Slingers »

Reader Comments (123)

"vomit-streaked sin....."

It's a day later and I'm still crying with laughter.

You are the greatest, Jen!
You deserve every blogging award out there.

In fact, nest time I am going to nominate you for Best Religion blog and Best Political Site, in addition to Food, Humor, Cooking, etc.

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterheartafire

why bother discounting it? they should cut their losses, put it in the break room and add 'eat me' to the list of random phrases.

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteralicia

*My* cellphone is so old it's got a rotary dial! Okay, not really, but close.
Hey, Shahinrani, get a new battery for 10 bucks from Amazon & your phone will be like new! I just did that and now I can make a whole call without the battery dying!

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGretchen

What's a Mickey Munny?

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I used to have that phone too. I'm sad that it broke because all the ones I had after it weren't as good! That phone had really user-friend menus and a good, solid feel.

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCYW

Wow... speaking of Psychonauts, I think that cake is the same color as Bobby Zilch's canvas-of-decay gumline.

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I understand hanging on to your phone completely. My current phone is eight years old, falling to pieces and most of the time the battery dies whenever someone calls it (I can only use it to send texts). I have been given two different new phones, but I just can’t bare to part with it/ do not want to learn how to use a new phone.

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Psychonauts!

What's your favorite level? I think mine is Lungfishopolis.

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterClaire

The irony is that $11.97 is also probably the current value of your phone.

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

And by $11.97 I meant $11.69. What? I can't be expected to remember the entire price of something if I have to do something complicated in between like click on the comment section.

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

My phone was made before camera phones were invented. It has a monochrome display. Next to my phone, yours looks like the starship Enterprise.

February 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMrs. Chaucer's Pirate

Where did you buy the mickey munny doll from?
thanks!

February 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I didn't even realize it was a CCC due to the myriad issues it's got going on. I think maybe the inscription was supposed to be a text message convo? But it should have been text speak then, no?

But I totally understand your phone thing. My wireless carrier contacted me to see if I didn't want to get a new phone because one as old as mine (only a preschooler, LOL) can't possibly still work. The sales rep didn't believe me when I said it still works perfectly (and I'd pass on paying more for fewer minutes for the privilege of buying a new phone).

February 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMJS

Am I seein' that right, or is the "Happy Birthday" not even on the cake?? Looks like it's on the paper on the bottom of the tray. Now that's creative :(

February 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSkierRMH

i can't believe you got a Mickey Munny! AND it's a DIY one...you should make a cake-wreck Munny homage of some sort =)

February 7, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterVickipedia

I have that phone too. It's a sweet phone!

February 9, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Well, if all you want your phone to do is make calls and you don't really care what it looks like, then what's the point of a new phone. Personally, I'm one of those people who gets a new phone every six months or so.

February 9, 2009 | Unregistered Commenternc

Don't feel bad I have the exact same phone!!!!

February 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I had that same phone from 2003 up until about a year ago. I loved it so much! It had everything i needed. Glad to see that I am not the only one that had that phone for so long!

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterIzzy

*gasp* I love the Mickey Vinylmation!

May 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCarla

For the record, I'm a 21 year old female and I had your phone less than a year ago. I loved it. Passionately.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

I love Psychonauts also!
One of the BEST games EVER :D

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLauren

$11.69 for that cake? Boy, those people are STEEP!
Funny as always, thanx!

P.S. Your toy is CUTE!

April 12, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterScarlett Robyn

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