Gobble 'Til Ya Wobble

IIIIIT'S TURKEY DAY!!!

And just in time, too, 'cuz the gang's all here! Here, lemme introduce you.

There's...

Spuds McTurkey:

Stretch:

Chuckles:

Daddy Long Legs:

Mad Eye:

Danny Double D:

(aka "The Smothered Brother")

The Gobbler:

"All right, all right; just one wafer-thin mint."

...and, last but definitely not least, Mr. Hurkey:

"HOOOOWDY HO!!"

They're here to wish you a very:

Or, if you prefer past tense:

Now get out there, my friends, and:

Sounds painful.

Sooo... chop chop!

Thanks given to Ashley K., Bonnie C., Caitlin D., Carina B., Allie S., Lauren M., Rachel S., Tammy P., Maggie W., Judith R., Courtney, Daniel L., & Leslie M. for making "ham" a verb.

Cry Fowl

THIS JUST IN from WREX-TV:

A toxic icing spill at an area shopping mall has left locals traumatized, confused, and a little peckish:

However, it was in the bakery that results were most devastating, particularly among the turkey cakes.

Some burst into flames:

...others complained of being a bit chilly:

"I'll give you a heads up when it's warmer, guys."

And a few even found themselves on the new literal reality show, "Face Off."

"This punches you in the face with how bad it sucks."

"I liked it!"

"Nobody asked you, Ve."

This guy was spotted rolling down the bread aisle:

He looks fierce, but turned out to be a big cream puff.
(Now he's toast.)

Sadly, the largest percentage of cakes turned into something experts call "poo wangs."

And once a bakery is infested with poo wangs, it's really hard to flush them out.

In the mean time, though, the bakery is having a sale on the classic English dessert, "spotted dick."

So it looks like this situation might have a happy ending, after all.

Thanks to Jayson G., MK, Sara G., Lisa P., Judi I., Nat B., Wendy C., & Laurence R. for the spot of English culture.