Turkey Turkey GOOSE

Anytime you see something vaguely bird-like in a bakery this time of year, I guess you have to assume it's supposed to be a turkey. These guys found by Shelley L., however, are plopped somewhere along the line between a bat and a melting chicken:

Now, I must admit: at first glance I thought they were kind of cute. Then I realized that the 4 guys in the middle are smoking cigarettes - now what kind of an example is that? Plus, they're all being goosed by what must be uncommonly sharp candy corns: hellooo! cruelty to batty bird creatures! Not cool, man. Not cool.

Here are some other cupcake creations riding that cute/wtf? line:

Ok, yes, they're round and have googly eyes, and therefore I must love them. However, what the heck are they made of? Is that really solid icing? Please, Michele L., tell me that's not solid icing! What'd they do, ice the things with an ice cream scoop?

Turkeys

With Thanksgiving approaching, bakeries across the nation are churning out turkeys just as fast as they can.

Er, turkey cakes, I mean. Yeah.

I'm not sure who is more confused: me or the decorator who made this:

First I see a weird smiley face whose hair is on fire. Then I see... no, wait - sorry, that's all I see.

Despite the fact that these look like electrified squirrels with blazing tails, they're actually sort of cute. In a frantic, somebody-get-me-a-bucket-of-water kind of way, I mean.

Of course, then there's the turkey who's already been extinguished [smirk]:

(That's a brownie, not a cake. Pretty soon bakeries are going to start "decorating" our loaves of bread, if we're not careful.)

Unless you're eating at a restaurant at the end of the universe, I'm pretty sure your food should never talk to you - much less advocate your imbibing its flesh. Yech.

Then again:

Maybe it's worse when the thing is pleading with you NOT to eat it.

"Thing" being the operative word here, since this looks like the result of craft time at the local preschool. All it's missing is a construction paper hand-tracing for a tail, and maybe a bunch of glitter.

(Hey, now, put that glitter down, Wreckerators; I didn't mean to give you any ideas!)

Thanks to Jessi W., Jocelyn M., Delielah R., and Bonnie B.!