The Basket Case
April 19, 2017 Ahh, those pesky unsold Easter cakes. I feel your pain, bakers. Or rather, I *see* it:
;)
And that IS quite the pickle.
But never fear.
I AM HERE TO HELP.
Listen, like everything in life, this problem can be easily solved by a little thing called re-branding.
So.
What do you see here? An evil lamb cake?
;)
Or is it an evil CLOWN cake? Hmmm?
Right? That's an instant tie-in to Stephen King's IT!
And now you can stop trying to convince your customers this is a bunny:
;)
And instead start insisting it's Hello Kitty!
A tisket, a tasket, *I* see a UFO blowing a gasket:
;)
And speaking of the truth being "out there," clearly your fruit department is ready to fill a much-needed gap in the horror sub-genre of grocery shopping:
;)
Goodbye "spring chicks," hellooooo alien chest-bursters!
And speaking of bursting [HEYOOO], how are your bachelorette designs coming?
;)
Because I'd say you've definitely got a handle on 'em now.
Thanks to Brittanie H., Angi O., Rebecca B., Shirley W., Julieanne B., & Adrienne G. for helping us come to grips with a whole new kind of Easter egg. o.0
*****
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Reader Comments (21)
Those pineapple monstrosities were never anything but alien chest-bursters. Yikes.
I would like to purchase the first cake for my husband. We recently discovered that, in 1948, his grandfather was arrested for selling pickles "unfit for human consumption" in Connecticut. The Food and Drug Commisioner decreed that in order for a pickle to be fresh, it should bounce when dropped on one's shoe. As you can imagine, dear hubby is going through a period of great sadness and inner turmoil. Perhaps this cake will cheer him up. As for me, I'm tired of cleaning up the mess caused by him dropping every pickle in the house on his shoes. Just so you know, there is no pre-packaged store bought pickle available today that is fresh.
Anyway, perhaps we should start dropping cakes on our shoes to see if they're fresh. You can't be too careful.
But Hello Kitty has no visible mouth.
At first glance, I thought the chest bursting alien chicks (random side note- this is now my Band Name of the Day®) were Jack Skellington. A poorly executed one, but my mind saw Jack before it saw aliens and/or chicks.
I cannot comprehend the purpose of those pineapple fruit things. Why would anyone want to scare someone like that?
I can't BELIEVE I forgot the Easter Pickle this year! What a terrible mother I am--this will surely scar my children for life!
@SuBee: I must confess, I find the idea of a "fresh" pickle very confusing. Isn't that the whole point of pickles--that they're NOT fresh but preserved and safe to eat? Otherwise, you'd just call them flavored cucumbers (or whatever foodstuff you're pickling). The only pickles I've ever found that were that bouncy were chilled (this is why I keep them in the fridge--so they'll crunch, not so they won't spoil) thus Vlasic sells pickles that are "fresh" by this rather absurd standard, since theirs are generally in a cold case.
I see ZOMBIE bird aliens. You.cannot.unsee.those.....things.. Gah!
@SuBee
I feel your pain. ROTFLMAO!
At first glance, that exploding UFO looked more like a turkey stuffed with Easter Eggs!!
@SuBee, as a native Connecticut Cake-wreck-a-holic myself, I second your motion of dropping cakes on our shoes to determine freshness. Thank you also for your advice and pickle prowess. Jen? Yep I saw a clown on the lamb cake, and I shall now have nightmares about it. Do not mind if that's the price one must pay for all the laughs and spit-takes I get from my favorite site!
It's obviously an Evil Clown Lamb cake.
.......because nothing says "Spring", like a "March of the Dead Vultures"....(Which is, in fact, what the credit reads on that next-to-last ...uhh.....treat.)..Well, Happy....things, and would you LOOK at the TIME?
Yahbye
=^©.©^=
I thought the pineapple ones were baby Skeksys from the Dark Crystal.
I applaud you, madam, for making a penis joke from an "Easter basket" wreck. Bravo!
My thought process while looking at the bunny/kitty cake: "Technically, Hello Kitty is the name of the whole franchise and the individual kitties have individual names. The main one is Kitty White. ... BAHAHAHA! Like wreckerators would know any of that! No sense confusing them with details."
Wow. Possessed Pineapple Dipping Birds. And, a dong shaped easter cathedral.
@cookiemama I too, am a cakewreck-a-holic. Perhaps Jen should conduct monthly meetings on the site.
And Zombie Bird Aliens is my new band name!
I thought the first wreck was the famous Easter frog, "Hoppy", not a pickle. Silly me.
I also thought the UFO was an Easter bonnet, with all the frills upon it...
But, honestly, those zombie chicks are horrifying, and no amount of cellophane or green ribbon can soften the effect.
The atrocious writing on the 1st one not-so-clearly says LaRRy easter.
Larry, of course, is a cucumber. He would very much like you to know that he is NOT a pickle.
It's Lambey the Clown!
"I don't think so. Lambey don't play that."
And those "chicks" are truly horrifying!
That lamb does look suspiciously like Pennywise. Wouldn't surprise me he paid a visit to the wreckerators lol