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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Mar062017

Mangled

You know that song from Tangled that always makes you cry?

This isn't that song.

 

[Spotlight on a single, burly baker]

It's delicious, creamy, dairy
I use so much it's scary

And design-wise, my cakes are not the neatest.

 

But with lots of yummy gook
There are flaws you'll overlook!

That's why I always pile on the sweetness.


Can't you see me at the counter making those hearts?
Piping on the icing in thick streams

Though it may look kinda deadly
As it sits there, swirling redly.
My motto's always been "More Buttercream!"

[chorus line of baker emerge from the shadows]

 

More Buttercream!
More Buttercream!

See, it's really quite as viscous as it seems!


Don't know what to call this creature
But more frosting is a feature!

I'll always choose to use more buttercream.

 

[second baker steps to mic]

It's got scars and lumps and bruises
Plus something here that oozes:

But still, to me, it's burger cake perfection


And despite handwriting woes
Frosting piles + Oreos

Will be enough to sell this sweet confection.


Can't you see this at your wedding, little ladies?
All the frosting hides the fact it leans.

Yes, I'm preaching to the choir
When I say, "Pile it higher!"
I always tell the bride,
"More Buttercream!"

 

More Buttercream!
Lick that lid clean!

And I know some of you think this is extreme!


Though our cakes leave stomachs screaming
There's a child inside you beaming

'Cause secretly you want more buttercream.

Yes, secretly you want more buttercreeeeeeam!

 

Thanks to Shannon S., Layla C., McKenzie R., Sarah, Jennifer, Heather M., Monica M., Anony M., Charity, & Maggie L. for living the dream, Cake Wrecks style.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

« On Your Mark, Get Set, WRECK! | Main | Sunday Sweets: No More Tiers! »

Reader Comments (42)

GAAAAAAAH! I feel SICK!

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterShirley

I love cakewrecks song parodies. Well done, well done! (And I mean that for Sharyn, not the wreckerators!)

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterWendelenn

After the first two, the rest don't look so bad.

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

This post was fantastic. Lyrics on fleek.

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

I always loved the guy with a hook for a hand who wanted to be a concert pianist (but don't write that on a cake, because I KNOW how it would come out. Confusing.)

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

Wow! One, fantastic song parody- had me cracking up laughing. Two- wow, I love me some icing. But even I have my limits, and all of these exceeded them *hurk*

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterakathleen

Not sure if that last picture is a collection of jaundiced cyclops eyes or sunflowers.

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterKathryn

Fantastic work, Sharyn! However, just a tiny quibble - I seriously doubt there's any dairy in factory-produced 'buttercream' frosting that most bakeries use. One major US brand lists: Sugar, Palm Oil, Water, Invert Sugar Syrup, Emulsifiers: E471, E435, E481, Salt, Colours: E171, E160a, Preservative: E202, Stabiliser: E450, Acidity Regulators: E524, E330, Flavouring. But it would probably be rather difficult to make these rhyme well... ;-)

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSusanD

I actually *do* have tears in my eyes...

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJoan

Here's the original: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mJICrhJD4-M

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

BEST.ONE.EVER!!!
I couldn't help singing along...

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterErica

*stands on imaginary chair, clapping wildly*
Bravo! Bravo, Sharyn! Bravo!

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterMovieMom

As my three-year-old would say, "Too much cake!"

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterHeidi

Encore! Encore! :)

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterZippy

Ain't no such thing as too much icing! Ever!

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBea

Yep, definitely sang that whole song. Bravo, Sharyn!

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJenn

As it turns out, I don't know that song from Tangled, so even if this were that song, I couldn't fit the words into a lyrical arrangement.

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterR3test

And now I've got the song stuck in my head. Thanks, Sharyn. :P (Now I need to watch Tangled again.)

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

LOL! Hilarious! I can actually hear the song playing in my head AND see the ruffians dancing along with it!

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterErica

Just when you think you've seen it all...and wish you hadn't.

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterDegera

ABSOLUTELY MAGNIFICENT! I am a HUGE! Tangled fan and couldn't help singing along with these wacky lyrics! Thanks for the giggles today!!

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJoanieB

"Cake Wrecks --The Musical!"

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterNeeta

I would love to read the second verse please?! This was fantastic! Or do a encore post with the rest of the cakes and the second verse. ;)

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterCheryl Gosselin

WOW, I always liked a lot of frosting but these take the cake! :-)

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterAnnie

My fifteen-year-old SON and I sang it! We love Tangled and Mangled is pretty good too. Beautiful!

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterGinger

I love Tangled!! I have that song on my playlist for running so of course I sang the entire thing. And good buttercream? Yes, please! Pile it on! But what the... heck is oozing from that hamburger bun? Maybe I'd rather not know.

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterPatricia

Ahehehehehehehehehehe :P

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Awesome guys... the lyrics, not the cakes! 😂

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterMaryo1230

I have to say, did anyone see what's in the background of the first ... mess? As if that frosting wasn't enough, there are donuts and custard cream mini eclairs. Holy moly, I am getting a dizzy sugar-rush just looking at these.

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBrookeG

Thanks Classic Steve for the link to the original song. I didn't know it so happily followed Sharyn's version along with the original. I thought it was well done before finding the original lyrics, now I think it is brilliant! (pity I can't say the same about the cakes)

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterCaryl

A request from an actual baker... For the love of god, please stop referring to the corn syrup sweetened chemical filled whipped shortening as Buttercream. There is not a table spoon of butter between all of these. So gross.

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterDeeDee

I'm calling my dentist tomorrow. I got a cavity just looking at them.

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterNoel

OMGee - this is the first time I've actually known the tune and could sing it in my head as I read! I'm going to blame that on a child obsessed with Tangled. Also, my stomach hurts now.

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterRaelyna

Omg this is your best post yet this was absolutley hysterical!

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterLilly

Just looking at those makes my teeth ache...

March 6, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

Currently the hubby and I are sharing a lovely cold so these just made me look on in shock and horror as hubby looked at them too and tried hard not to laugh hysterically therefore going into a huge coughing fit. Oh heck I did and it was worth the fit lol.

March 7, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

The oozing burger cake is "royal elegance." Not. I don't know the song (or the movie), but the post is still great!

March 7, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterNobodee Home

That second cake! Was the baker trying to make 3D balloons out of icing? Was there a fight? And the first cake - was it for someone aged 28 or aged 3? Whose B-Day is being celebrated? And how is it possible to roar with laughter while at the same time snorting in disbelief?

March 7, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterMorag

Agree with SusanD . . . if that was actually "butter"cream I might eat any of those (while singing, of course). But instead it's fakeycream so not actually food. (It IS "food grade"but that's not close enough.)

March 7, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterFM

I do have to say, that creature is pretty cute.....even though I'd never eat it!

March 8, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterLissa

Not sure whether to write "ROFL!" or "Rolf!"

March 10, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJMixx

Looks like one of those thugs from the Ugly Duckling saloon achieved their dream... and failed.

March 20, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterFrisk

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