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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

On The Plus Side, It's Never Too Soon To Introduce Your Five-Year-Old To Power Point

If you've been hanging around this blog for a while, then you probably remember the infamous Flash Drive wreck.

That's the one where someone brought in a photo on a flash drive, but instead of using the photo, the bakery recreated the flash drive itself on the cake. It's one of the most epic Cake Wrecks of all time, and taught us all a valuable lesson about the boundless nature of human derpitude.

I'm guessing Matthew here missed the flash drive post, though, because not only did he bring one in for his daughter's fifth birthday cake, he also had more than one photo on the drive.

In Matthew's defense, there were only two images on the drive to choose from: one, his daughter's favorite cartoon character, and the other, a Power Point flow chart from his company.

I'll give you two guesses which one the bakery used.

Aw, you guessed it, didn't you? See, I just can't surprise you guys anymore.


Thanks to Matt M. & little Gia for proving a Communication Network Decision Tree can be just as magical as Disney princesses, only the exact opposite of that.


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« AND DON'T CALL HIM "PATTY" | Main | With Apologies To Julie Andrews »

Reader Comments (33)

Holy moley! I'm always surprised at people's derpitude. It IS boundless. ROTFLMAO. Nice job on the chart tho'.


March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterMaryo1230

People this dense should not be allowed to walk around freely without help :P

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

That's hilarious.

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterLynne

I'm guessing there was no way on earth to contact Matthew and the decorator was left with a difficult decision. If he/she had chosen the cartoon character and Gia wanted the flow chart, they may have been accused of treating a brilliant five year old like a mere child. The next time something likes this happens, they should drive to the customers house and ask what they want on the cake. Or perhaps place an ad in the local newspaper requesting clarification.Or make two cakes. Otherwise, there's no way of really knowing.

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

The baker just wants an office job and figured they'd get a head start on the office birthdays.

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterEagle

No, you didn't surprise me, but you did make me laugh - and out loud, too! :-D

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSusanD

According to Randy Cassingham, over at "This is True", the correct name for this wreckorator is not "derp", but "obliviot".

Aaannnd, we have a winner!

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

So who is his daughter's favorite cartoon character?

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterTiffany

They must have thought that was one smart 5 year old!!

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterDebbie

The bakery maybe had an ancient computer that couldn't open the image file? But could open a PPT? Seems unlikely.

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterblue

Yes, the bakery did a very nice job -- good writing, tidy, precise, and colorful powerpoint. Sure, it's the wrong job, and you need to have the IQ of a wilted radish to have made this mistake, but still, the execution is much superior to most of the scrambled glop jobs we see here.

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterzeph

Wow, a wonderful job done on that flow chart, nice crisp clear lines and carefully done boxes with text in them, no less, a real tour de force! - what a great addition that would be to an office party. But, unfortunately......

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterAlison in Indiana

Is...uh.... anyone else curious to know what his daughter's favorite cartoon Disney princess character is? I'll bet it whatever it was had to be a bit more "entertaining" than poor Gia's....
On the plus side (Pollyanna, here), the script/piping was nicely done....
That's all...except it made me think of the Karmann Ghia, and how I never got one.
... =^-.-^=

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

That's good but...what does the flowchart say? Nevermind, it's still funny.

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterNathan R.

I really hate flow charts. Used to have a boss that wanted a flow chart for everything. If he could have forced us to use one for determining when to go to the bathroom, he would have. Flow charts are so confusing and don't make sense to me. But a flow chart in CAKE? I might have to take a second look at that.

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBluebonnet

Edible printing used nearly correctly, for once!

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterkayk

Derpitude is my new favorite word!

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterRRWalker

Would the opposite mistake have been worse?

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

In the words of Hicup "why would you do that?"

This is just plain stupid

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterGoblinPrincess

LOOK, at least we have to admit that the did a pretty good job of technical wrecking, there. Stayed true to the genre....proved themselves worthy ....
And, the pink piped script was actually quite above the norm (for many)....
The only qualm I have is that little Gia will be wondering where the playing pieces are.
=^-.-^= ("Toss me the dice; it's MY turn!")

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Derpitude... heh heh

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterWannek

Apparently, his daughter's favorite cartoon character is Flowy McFlowchartFace. I never miss that show!

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterFM

One possibility is that they couldn't print the cartoon due to copyright restrictions, but if they paid that much attention they likely would have realized a flow chart isn't a good fifth birthday image.

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSara

I will now make it my mission to incorporate derpitude and obliviot into my regular vocabulary.

This is the hardest I've laughed all week!

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterakathleen

To be fair, putting an image of a cartoon character on the cake would've been a violation of copyright law. So maybe it isn't an issue of derpitude so much as smartassiness.

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterKerry

Did you order cake?→NO→Too bad.

Was it a wreck? →NO→Good for you, too bad for us.

Did you submit it to Cake Wrecks? →Please do!


March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSeabird

To elaborate on @ClassicSteve's post above:

(Scene: 8:30 AM on Thursday morning. Matt's office.)

Ring, ring.."Uh, Matt, could you come to my office? Right now?"
Matt: "You wanted to see me, Bob?"
Bob: "Please take a seat. Matt, I was preparing for this afternoon's presentation to our new account. I started reviewing -- you know -- the communications network design..."
Matt: "Yeah. I've been working on it for the past month. Did you have any questions I could help with?"
Bob: "Uh, yeah...who the heck are Anna and Elsa?"

(Uh, oh...)

March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterNeeta

One tiny point of order: This is a Visio flowchart. Probably inserted into a PP slide.


March 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

Oh man well the flow chart looked nice at least lol. I hope the cake was at least edible cause with all that trouble wrecking it I would hope they ate the darn thing lol.

March 17, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

This is truly epic!

March 17, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJudy


March 19, 2017 | Unregistered Commentersugarmilky45

ROFLMBO. I seriously lost it when I read this description. Happy 5th Birthday, here's your Power Point Presentation!

March 20, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterChristine

I keep feeling that there's an unwritten joke in the comment about a "Flow Chart to determine when to go to the bathroom." And I keep snickering like a nine-year-old boy.

March 21, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJMixx

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