Keep It Simple, Keep It Safe

Much like land wars in Asia and dealing with your in-laws, ordering a cake is all about keeping certain information to yourself.
You don't leak state secrets, you don't say you hated last Sunday's casserole, and you never, EVER, tell a baker what size to write the 75:
BIG MISTAKE.
In fact, try to avoid giving your bakery any information you don't have to. Too much information just gums up the works, you guys. It's confusing. It's risky.
For example, does the bakery need to know WHY you want Kelly's cake in orange and blue?
No. No, it does not.
And if you don't want a name on the birthday cake, it's really not a good idea to ask for the icing to be "Tiffany blue."
A rose by any other name may smell as sweet, but your-friend-who-isn't-named-Tiffany's gonna be pissed.
Hey, speaking of names, did you know there's a singer named Yolanda Adams?
I didn't. Neither did this next baker.
So saying, "Like the singer Yolanda Adams" might not be as helpful as you think:
Boops.
And finally, minions, if you provide a photo reference for your cake order, like this:
Then let the photo do the talking, so to speak. Don't add more. Don't go on to say that you want the bakery to "make it as Mexican as possible."
Because you know what's really, REALLY Mexican?
(This is not the set up for a racist joke, I swear.)
The Mexican flag.
(The green pitchforks, not so much.)
Thanks to Sarah M., Morgan W., Mary P., Sandra G., & Mar O., who Sauron what I did there with the title.
*****
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Reader Comments (29)
That's an awesome Mexican flag! Believe me, I would know.
The clarification on Kelly's cake was helpful. I saw the orange and blue and assumed she was a Met's fan, although the blue was not quite right. Just as Tiffany's blue is not Tiffany blue.
I personally appreciate the fact that the last baker just had to put those roses in the corner of the Mexican as fudge cake because every cake they ever made had roses in the corner. CADA torta.
WHAT kind of fan is Kelly? I swear her cookie cake looks like it says "She is a ailriss fan", which doesn't really make sense.
Then again, what site am I on? I should know better than to hope for sense.
If I was Kelly, I sure wouldn’t complain! Anything that got me more icing, I wouldn’t care what it said!
Hmmm...I gotta say, my husband is Mexican. He definitely looks more like the second Mexico cake than the first. However, he's not a cake. As cakes go, the first one looks like what we expect from Mexican decor, but the second one definitely looks more authentic.
What am I saying? Creative license...yeah, that's it. The first one is certainly a better looking cake, even if less authentic. We want beauty, not authenticity.
As a side note (to add to this whole side note of a comment) my granddaughters asked grandpa if he ever wore a sombrero. He didn't except for a picture once. He does like tequila, though.
Maybe it's because I'm not into sports? But I can't make out what kind of a fan that she is, the writing is so thick.
Heh
I like the bonus Princess Bride reference!!!
to answer the comment questions- Kelly is apparently an Auburn fan :-)
Kelly's cake looks like it says she's an Airbus fan. Ok, then...
The recipient of Cake #3 is going to be nicknamed "Jiffany" forever.
What's wrong with the cake for Tiffany? The T looks like a J, is that the mistake?
[Editor's note- They asked for Tiffany blue icing to say Happy 30th! Instead, they wrote the name as Tiffany. -john (thoJ)]
Someone knows the singer Yolanda Adams and made a cake for her? You wouldn’t think celebrities accept cakes from fans.
Nice writing, nice edging, nice flags... nicest blog here in a while that's not a Sunday.
I'm pretty sure Kelly is an AUBURN fan, aside from that where's the Princess Bride reference? I missed it? Explanations?
Is the correct spelling for the last cake Wrecksican or Wrexican?
At least it didn't say," Happy Birthday Jiffany Blue."
That sounds like a song title.
Nathan R: Land war in Asia ;)
*Shrugs*. I like the Mexican flag cake more than the more festive version. Hopefully it cost less since it didn't have the mini sombreros & tacos. 😜
It's too bad Kelly's cake didn't have a tiger. Trying to read that message was an eye scream. 😨
Hmm these cakes lol. Gotta laugh and then wonder where they find these people to work for their bakeries??
@Lisa when was the Princess Bride talking about a land war in Asia?? I'm even more lost then before.
Nevermind, I found it but the 'land war in asia' was considered a 'classic blunder' never said anything in there about keeping info to yourself but that's neither here or there.
"They asked for Tiffany blue." Is that the same they in "they wrote the name as Tiffany?"
For those that can't read what type of fan Kelly is... She's an Auburn fan! War Eagle!
I was just having a discussion about how weird it is that the Auburn colors do not include auburn.
Also, is anyone else annoyed that the dots over the letter I in "birthday" and "is" are different than the rest of the writing. It's already hard to read, and the dots look like sprinkles or frosting accidents.
"Tiffany Blue" is the color of the gift boxes and bags from the Tiffany stores.
The Princess Bride reference is when Vizzini is talking to the Man in Black: Vizzini: You only think I guessed wrong! That's what's so funny! I switched glasses when your back was turned! Ha ha! You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders - the most famous of which is "never get involved in a land war in Asia" - but only slightly less well-known is this: "Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line"! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha..." *drops dead*
Yolanda Adams is a wonderful gospel singer! Her music has blessed so many peoples lives and brought so many people to Christ. She has a beautiful voice and a beautiful message and I encourage a hold of you to check her out! Go on iTunes and look up Yolanda Adams. I promise you, you will not be sorry. CHECK HER OUT JEN!
Tiffany Blue is my new Drag Name.
Cheers!
Storm