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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Jan292016

Playing The Name Game

Sure, names are hard, and with folks naming their kids Kyd and Blendrr and "Jennifer with one N", you can't really blame the poor bakers for getting it wrong.

Unless it's really funny, of course.

 

Think "Eva" is easy to spell? Well it is. Almost... [eyes narrowing]... TOO EASY.

I guess the "Balloons" is silent.

 

For Michael:

"I C what you did there."

(True Story: I only included this one for the punch line. WHUT.)

 

For Avery:

Each and Avery time.

 

Here's the trouble with sounding out "Jose":

 

A new nick name for Stacey:

 

And for Brooke!

 

But Christie Lynn gets a promotion:

 

And finally, the always classic, "Stephen with a 'ph'":

via

 

Thanks to Donna M., Alecia W., Anna B., Cap, Michelle F., Jennifer C., Christie G., & Steph D. for the phuper phweet phpelling.

*****

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Reader Comments (40)

Forget about spelling Eva. What's with the "Happy…spaghetti mess" that they tried to wish on her?

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterShirley

I love the last one the best! Hahahahahahahahaha!!!!!
Lovely roses on that last one, also, but a little unusual for a man's cake, isn't it?
Thanks for these Jen!

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen S

Another hilarious one Jen! I sphit tee out at avery wreck. I can't phteven imagine the looks on the cake buyers faces. Priceless! My fave way to add laughter to my day, averyday, is Cakewrecks!

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCookiemama

The "new nickname for Stacey" one reminds me of a cake my aunt got when I was a kid. My birthday is very close to my mom's, aunt's, and grandma's, so it was a cake for all four of us. It said "Happy birthday Charlotte, Sandra, Mary, and Larry". My name is Lacey >_< No one else noticed until I pointed it out.

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLacey

OMG that last one bwahaha XD

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

This was a super funny post! I was crying by the last one, Phteven.

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

what is this I don't phteven

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

I should have seen that last one coming, but didn't, so I had a huge belly laugh about that! Why are my coworkers staring at me?

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

Is that "Happy Birthday Everyborg"? Not sure how you'd determine what the birthday was, but I suppose they want cake too.

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJoel Polowin

The last made me laugh out loud! (That's right, I spelled it out) Just when you think there are only so many ways to screw up a name....

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterErica

If your name was Crooke would the "e" be silent? I can't decide which would sound better, but I am leaning towards keeping the "e" silent.

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAnonyMe

From what planet are these decorators coming?

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterColin M.

I now want to make friends with someone named Jose just so I can send him a cake.

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterTriciaL

Phteven! (no more words needed)

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered Commenters.marie

Poor Spacey. The cake is well done, and the writing is lovely. Shame about her name.

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

My son's name is Stephen (with a "ph"). The struggle is real.

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterGinger

I am never disappointed when I go on to your page. Always brightens my day. Still hard to believe someone actually made these mistakes.

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJoan

I am not a Crooke!

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterexactlywatt

Fonetically, wouldn't Jose be Josay?!! Josay can you see? By the dawns early light.

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSue W.

Have to read that last one as Sylvester the Cat.

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterChazz

I just sat here trying to say "phuper phweet phpelling" in my head, but couldn't get my mind's tongue to untie. So I resorted to saying it out loud...now my coworkers wonder what is going on in my cube...

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterRuthie

My son is Steven; the struggle is real on this end, too.

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBookish

Not only is this post hilarious, but it seems to have stimulated commenters to their very best! Thanks Jen and everybody else for the laughs! Poor Phteven and Spacey... and Crooke is awful. Time for a "NOCSMyN" (No One Can Spell My Name) Support Group?

Shirley, I think I will request that, once I have reached a "certain age," people wish me a "Happy Spaghetti Mess" so I don't have to actually face another birthday.

Cookiemama, did you mean to say, "Phriceless"? Speaking of which, is the "E" silent or not if your last name is "Cooke"?

Joel Polowin, I think that, oddly enough, "Happy Birthday Everyborg" makes a certain kind of sense. It *is* cake, after all; resistance is futile!

And, Larry--er, Lacey--I'm sorry about your cake. Maybe it was dreadful penmanship--er, frostingmanship?

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJMixx

I'm back visiting after a long absence of hard work--too hard to have 5 minutes on CW. I love these mythspellings! I laughed so hard my stomach hurts! Thank you, thank you!

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCloudy

http://i3.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/014/409/phteven.JPG

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKris

I wish MY name was Spacey... Cause that cake is GORGEOUS!! Love the script!! :)

Yeah, we've had Stev/phen trouble in my family, too... Pop is Stephen, junior is Steven, and Grandma was NOT happy!!

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterK Michelle

Wow. I pity any poor soul who ever gets me a cake and has to ask the baker for 'Siobhan with a bh'

January 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSiobhan

I think Eva should be happy the baker didn't try to make balloons. We all know how wrong that can go.

January 30, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNobodee Home

Great, now I've got a mental picture of Tuna (aka Phteven), the dog with the massive underbite, complaining about the terrible phpelling...

January 30, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterDr Handle

Oh man those were priceless lol. Especially the happy birthday everyone for Avery.. sheesh at least that looked like everyone to me lol.

January 30, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

On cake #5, maybe the wreckorator had just finished watching "American Beauty" or "The Ususal Suspects" or "K-Pax", and had Kevin Spacey on the brain. (He IS pretty unforgettable! <3 )

January 30, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCali Kath

Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl...and PHTEVEN!!!!

January 30, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterTheCreepyTribble

OMG, Phteven made me laugh like a donkey. :D

January 30, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle A

I defy anyone to try pronouncing Phteven out loud a few times without laughing.

January 30, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMr bumblepants

Either Eva's cake is really tiny, or those strawberry halves are enormous!

January 30, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterkayk

For Siobhan: Would that be, Siobhan with a Beeyaich, Beyatch? I have the shudder-giggles, (is that, shuddles, or gudders?) when I envision what YOUR Cakewreck will be like!

I was thinking about poor Phpacey, that poor child. It's not bad enough that you'll soon grow up to be a short, prematurely balding, murderous psychopath running for the highest office in the land, (or murdering your way there), but possibly--the CAKE DROVE HER TO IT! All those years of being taunted..."Phpacey, Phpacey, your name is doo-doo too, you're all cray-zeee, and your cake sure is too..."

Oh, I spit water all over my new keyboard with Phteven. It's freaking precious.

January 31, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterHitch

You know, I'd always figured most of these kinds of wrecks came about because the decorator wasn't a native English speaker or something like that. Until I saw "Hosa", that is. That is clearly the work of someone who knows English, but has apparently never been exposed to Spanish in their entire life.

February 1, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterWildaBeast

Well, obviously 'Eva' is just her nickname... they wanted her full name on the cake!

February 8, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterccrow

I have a confession... I DECORATED THE SPACEY CAKE! I feel horrible! To be fair though, "T" and "P" sound very similar when taking an order over the phone, and we always spell names back... especially unusual names like "Spacey!" I would have fixed it had they said something at pick up! Sorry Stacey!!!!

March 9, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterjparke

My son is Christopher, so he's been promoted to Christ on occasion! Also Christo, Christop, Christophe (I like that last one because it's French). And then I also get the joy of specifying "with a ph", so now I'm looking forward to seeing "Phristofer" eventually!

March 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

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