8 Hilarious Wrecks Bakers Want Us To Believe Are Football Helmets
September 17, 2015 I'll be the first to admit that a football helmet is not the easiest thing to draw:
;)
It's all round and confusing and stuff.
BUT STILL.
;)
But still.
;)
Really, bakers?
;)
REALLY??
If you had no context, tell me you wouldn't think this was a cheese grater:
;)
And this was a happy whale:
;)
Here's a couch in front of a window:
;)
And a, uh...
;)
...demonic hacky sack?
Eesh, how sad is it when this is the best one?
;)
If only bakers had a helmet shaped PAN, you know? Something that locks them into the right shape, so they absolutely, positively, could NOT mess it...
;)
*headdesk*
Thanks to Bruce B., Manda, Matt M., Anony M., Brielle R., Kristin N., Heather F., Rachel K., & Anna E. for finding a reason I might actually need a helmet. (Or possibly a padded desk.)
*****
Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.
Reader Comments (43)
A cheese grader! If only my teachers had given out cheese instead of bad grades... (sorry, couldn't help it. I'll go stand in my corner now.)
These are some of the worst wrecks I've ever seen, and that's really saying something. That first one looks like a drunk zombie.
[Editor's note- Bwoops. It's my job to catch those mistakes. Of course I also overslept today and woke up to 2 emails and 22 comments telling me about it. So, thanks everybody for letting me know. You guys are grate. -john (the bad spell checker for Jen)]
The seventh wreck down is a Borg badger climbing out of its sett on a dark night with flames behind it. I'm surprised you didn't realize, Jen.
You cannot make a CCC (ptooie!) look like a football helmet. Not gonna happen. Please (PLEASE) bakers. Stop trying.
I'm very surprised at how many of the cakes are Broncos cakes and yet I've never seen any in person.
Congradulations [sic], Jen.
You've completely crossed over and become one!
A cheese grader?
Is that a student in the year between 6th and 7th grades?
Or like on the Cheez-it commercials, the person who determines if the cheese is ready to become a cracker?
Keep up the hilarious work!
Now they're just messing with us...
Most of them look like alien heads.
I think the "cheese grater" looks like the shape and color of a bathroom hand dryer. Super appetizing!
Yeesh! The first and last ones resemble death's heads. The rest - your guess is as good as mine. (What's a cheese grader?)
All My Wrecky Friends Are Coming Over Tonight
I got evil chompin’ monsters, a thing to grate cheese
Jen, it’s hard to see a helmet in these
I got whales that are cute, I got a nice couch
Looking at these things make my eyes say, “ouch”
I think the seafoam igloo looks cozy - am I right?
All my wrecky friends are coming over tonight
I find the lyrics to the original a bit misogynistic, but I used it anyway. Does that make me a bad person?
If it wasn't for the plastic footballs and the roman numerals, I'd have thought the "best" one was a spider flinging a web while surfing a tidal wave.
Is the last one Barneys evil green brother?
The problem with most of these wrecks is that they're arranging cupcakes into clusters that are SUPPOSED TO kinda sorta vaguely resemble something other than the cupcakes they actually are. As they say on Mythbusters, "well, there's your problem right there!".
The rest were obviously drawn/decorated/wrecked by someone with no concept of what a helmet is supposed to look like.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
WTF that is the worst use for ccc's ever
All I know is that I wouldn't want to see that second one coming at me in Mario Kart.
Demonic hacky sack! Bwahahaha!
(That one could almost NOT be a Wreck if you've ever gone past the Denver airport and seen Blucifer...)
I'm not sure why it would be so bad to sell a group of cupcakes decorated as a group of cupcakes.
Also not sure when Gary Busey was reincarnated as a whale.
Don't you know anything? The "couch" is obviously a recliner chair. Can't you see the black dot for the recliner handle? :)
I'm sort of OK with the last one. I think they on-purpose used a helmet pan to make a zombie cake. They were way more successful in making it look like a zombie than anyone was in making it look like a helmet, at any rate.
Happy whale? I saw flamingo headstand! And the cheese grater? An aborted attempt at yin-yang. I love playing this game every day! Thanks wreckerators! Keep up the hysterically awful work!
p.s. Pray for me- as mother of the bride, I'm ordering THE cake tomorrow. I've approached major surgery with less dread of an unfavorable outcome.
@s.marie: good luck! What's the worst that can happen? Oh, wait...
Bwah! Jen made my day, as usual.
I didn't think the second one was actually that bad. The "Bronco" on the third one, however, looks like a delinquent hand puppet with a mohawk!
The third one from the bottom is totally a polar bear, and he is furious for being mistaken for a helmet! Behind him is of course the night sky, complete with Nordic lights.
Hmm, I like the second one. It's neatly made and attractively colored. Of course it resembles the hood of a fifties' car or some new sort of diving helmet far more than a football helmet, but I'd buy it just as a pretty objet d'art. If we did make teams play in helmets like that one the game would be different. Lack of peripheral vision would make the quarterback highly vulnerable.
Well I'm glad to see that the Grinch loves to celebrate Halloween. It's great to see him expanding his interests to something other then stealing Christmas.
Anyone who'd pay $11 for a giant cookie deserves all the wreckin' they get.
I think the cheese grater looks more like a bottle opener. And you have to admit, that last one makes a better Halloween monster head than any of the others make football helmets. I did find it amusing that the pan not only is vaguely helmet shaped, but the lid even has impressed details in case the wreckorators need a guide.
Hey-- no fair! Just because I'm on the west coast I don't get to make fun of the cheese grader?
But now that you brie-ng it up, that last one is a pretty good münster!
Both the reddish curved cakes looked like flamingos with muzzles to me.
I'm not really into football or sports.... could someone tell me what team the flaming polar bear and the T-rex are on? Because that game actually sounds interesting. I lost all sense of what anything was after the cake that looks like a half of a decapitated ying yang... Props!
The more of these cakes I see the more glad I am I don't eat cake.
I use the formed helmet pan. It makes it easy not to mess it up. At least for me!
The first one would be good for a Dia de los Muertos celebration.
The first wreck at first glance appeared to a tape dispenser. I then looked at it again and decided that it looked like a monster's head from Scooby Doo. The second a second rate, cheap, knock-off Dallas Cowboys licensed cat house.
They came full circle. The first one looks like a weird skull they tried to turn into a helmet and the last one is a helmet they tried to turn into a weird skull.
Oh man. Hilarious that not one wreckerator even came close to a helmet. I wonder if they have even seen one before. These have me laughing so hard..
Words from the 4-year old: the last one is a One-eyed Lizard. With centipedes and ants crawling on it.
If you turn the "cheese grater" upside down, it's a dismayed pac-man.
That last green is supposed to be an alien/monster head.
I don't see a cheese grater, but I think they did a pretty good job if it was supposed to look like one of those clear tape dispensers.
That yellow one is a roll of tape. Can't unsee it.
The last one's a green skull guy, smiling and saying, "Hey-yee!"
Oh, guys, stop hating on the poor Gorn.
The "happy whale" has been reviewed by our kids and they 'know' that it is a road kill platypus. But not Perry.