A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.
Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)
November 19, 2015 ;)
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A wedding dress:
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A paw print:
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Another paw print:
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A... butterfly?
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And lest you had any faith in humanity left,
A balloon:
;)
Thanks to Carol A., Dave K., Carrie L., Shari S., Anony M., Rosemary H., Pam S., Katherine H., & Kate J. for the latest reminder that CCCs (patooie!) are still an abomination.
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Reader Comments (41)
If there's one thing I've learned over the past few months, it's that one can be quite skilled at rocket surgery and still be a totally wacked out "cake decorator."
Now, drop the balloons...
Sooo, can someone who is familiar with the sportsball tell me what those four lines at the top of the play ball CCC (ptooie) are supposed to be? I'm stumped.
I gotta say, as CCCs (ptooie) go, that brown mitt is actually quite well done.
Is that last one frosted in pea soup?
They may be rocket surgeons, but they aren't the brightest tools in the shed.
To give the decorator of the wedding dress a bit of credit, as a decorator, every reference picture I see for that godawful dress looks exactly like that. It's horrendous, but people love it for some reason. Like rosette cakes, ugh.
Nothing says delicious like baby poop green cupcakes.
I don't actually hate the wedding dress of cupcakes - I think it would be cute for a bridal shower. IF ONLY they left off the crappy writing; which is on what appears to be sheets of plastic because...??? No clue.
As to the rest, I have zero artistic talent, but I feel like I could have done a better job than some of these so called 'professionals'.
Here's wishing the rockets a full recovery.
SuBee, if there's one thing I've learned over the past few months, it's that one can be quite skilled at brain surgery and still be totally wacked out.
The "wedding dress" would not be nearly as bad if they had left that wretched writing wreckdiculousness off of it.
Why on earth would they not have just made each individual cupcake into a baseball for that first cake?? Each cupcake is ROUND and WHITE, just like a baseball! So why arrange them into a not-round shape?? WHY???
The first baseball cake would almost look round if they used only 10 cupcakes instead of 12. Those red lines in the upper right are meant to indicate that it is flying through the air, I think.
That green balloon is probably the saddest cake I have ever seen. What is that extra bit at the bottom supposed to be? The weight that holds down helium balloons? If they had left it up at the top the cake still wouldn't look like a balloon but it wouldn't be SO awful!
And after seeing what writing looks like over top of rosettes I can see why the wedding dress text is done on smooth plastic.
OMG! That balloon made me spit my iced tea. LOL
@ AngelaS -- I agree with you on the baseball mitt--the only thing that made me sad about it is that it seems that the baseball is not a single cupcake.... that would have been better.
@tipsykit I thought the exact same thing!
Rocket surgery! Rocket Surgery! This sis my new favorite! That's as good as 'long walks in front of fireplaces"! Thank you!
The writing on the sheet of plastic just made me remember something about my grandmother: when she had a cake that was decorated by 'professionals', she insisted on saving at least one of the frosting flowers. (They were always flowers.) She kept them in her china cabinet, for years, nay, for decades. The china cabinet held many treasures but it was the pile of old frosting flowers, which NEVER molded or decayed, that I truly coveted as a very young child. Once, she actually let me have one. It was awful, and thus died one of my earliest dreams.
These cakes have have destroyed whatever dreams remained.
Is it wrong that I kind of like that butterfly? Yes? Darn.
#3 Y?
What in the world is that pink breast cancer awareness...thing supposed to be? A pair of overalls?
@jackwire-You best be careful, lest someone attempt to stab you in the belt buckle with an offset spatula.
Am I the only one that thinks the wedding dress looks like a Dalek?
A balloon? Um. Okay. Uh. Just not seeing it.
Haven't spent that much time staring at a photo since earlier this week when our local state park posted a photo with no caption on Facebook. Spent a good 10 minutes trying to figure out what kind of bird was sitting in the hole in the tree. Later discovered it was some sort of furry mushroom.
How much frosting do they have in some of these ccc? Its like Spackle.
Isabeau--I didn't see it before, but you're right -- it does look like a Dalek! LD
Just wanted to say as a professional cake decorator at a bakery, I've done numerous "wedding dress" cupcake cakes, they all look pretty much like that picture (which isn't all that bad). It's just an awkward design, but super popular.
Finally! A cake balloon that doesn't look like sperm!
When I looked at #4, I thought it was kinda mean to hit Don King in the back of the head with a baseball.
I kind of like the wedding dress. A lot of dresses are kind of swirly and lumpy so that seems like a decent rendition. At least knew what it was. :)
Does anyone else see red skiing trails going down a white mountain on the first ccc? The butterfly isn't too bad but the balloon frosted with mashed peas is terrible.
@Isabeau - Nope, that was my first thought too!
Maybe the first one is a too-literal baseball diamond?
I too am liking the psychedelic butterfly but I'm off my face on my happy pills. If they left the green splodge as a green splodge you could pretend it was broccoli cake which seems quite healthy although it's probably safer to bung it in the nearest bin.
That wedding dress looks like every wedding dress from 1983. Still I wouldn't want to eat that mess.
@ Tipsykit
Because they are too lazy to bake a round layer cake to do the same job so go out of their way to use pre-baked cupcake to do the same job(or conversely take more time to bake a dozen cupcakes instead you pick). Think about it, if you make the actual layer cake you have to top it, divide it into layers and then frost it. Why go to all that trouble when you can just mash cupcakes together and then smash frosting all over the top without care or reason instead.
Taking the extra time to be lazy was never more apparent then when you see a CCC anywhere.
1. A ran over baseball
2. Patrick is that you?
3. Dowsing rod used to find breast cancer
4. At least it has the correct amount of fingers
5. Wedding dress? If you say so.
6 & 7. Broken feet?
8. Some sort of tie-dye creature from a nightmare
9. Why does that "balloon" have a testicle?
@Isolder74: speaking of laziness, is it just me, or is the second "paw print" (cake #7) frosted straight onto the cardboard box? Why bother with a cake at all when you can preserve the design for all time on cardboard?
Lmao. That wedding dress.. wow. Some of these are just plain frightening that they were put out in the first place.
1. cloud with red lightning
2. Abu ghraib in tricouleur
3. pink overalls
4. whomping willow
5. poodle puppy
6. OOOOO liberty bell
7. Disney monorail car
8. beautiful butterfly
9. contour map of islands for social studies projecct
@ Dalek: Considering how much frosting is on top of these things that is pretty much what they are doing already.
I still find it funny to see bakers spending more time to do thing "easier."
Ack! Mine eyes... they BURN!
I hereby request a proper disclaimer for the next time so many CCC's (patooie!) are going to be in one post like that. Now I have to eat a wedding dress or a baseball glove to purge my system.
#3 Seriously, Y? What is that? Why is that? y, y, Y???!!!!