Nah, These Won't Traumatize the Kids at ALL
September 25, 2014 These cakes are all quite nicely done. I'm sure that will be of some comfort to the kids when they're in therapy.
Sock-hop it to me, Audrey R.!
;)
Yes, happy birthday, girls, from Headless Flo and her Tinker-Toy Poodle Skirt of Probable Misfortune. ("Doom" was taken.)
Now, who wants ice cream?
"No, no, Patrick, the dinosaur isn't trying to eat you. He's here to party!"
;)
See? Look at that cute little party hat! It really bring out his razor sharp teeth, don't you think, Selah T.?
Speaking of teeth...
;)
This looks like the aftermath of a fairy-tale massacre, or in other words, a-DOR-able! [sing-song voice] Say, Arloe S., is that middle pig coming or going?
[announcer voice] "Hey parents, are you tired of boring, peaceful birthday parties? Want to add a little more excitement back into the one-year celebration? Then ask for the Dead Elephant special!"
;)
[Kids yelling] "Yay! Dead elephants!"
[announcer] "That's right, kids! Yes, these delectable globs of deceased pachyderms tell the world: this party is gonna be killer!
"Side effects may include screaming, crying, thumb-sucking, sweating, itchy palms, irritable bowel, and a life-long fear of blue animals. Not recommended for children with nervous constitutions or sensitive bladders. Dead elephants are not responsible for any damages - real or imagined - done to your children. Void where prohibited, all rights reserved."
You've got a killer eye there, Andrew C.
*****
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Reader Comments (60)
Wow two elephants look drunk and the other two are dead lol. Ah so glad one year old won't recall this cake. That dinosaur cake was neat. I am sure the kid loves dinos even if they want to eat him .
The lines drawn between the tufts of fur on Headless Flo's poodle make it look like a constellation map. The Poodle - it's slightly to the left of Orion's Belt.
I imagine the elephants are blue because the cake is for a boy.
Except for the feet, Cake #1 looks like an outfit on a dress form. Which is probably what it was intended to be, but the wrecker has never seen nor heard of a dress form before.
Cake #2: Patrick's mom requested Barney. Baker said, "$#%^ that! I'll give her a REAL dinosaur!"
Cake #3: "I like pig butts and I cannot lie, you other wolves can't deny . . ."
As for the "dead" elephants, they were supposed to be pink, but then the baker noticed that there was a boy's name on the order form. Can't have pink on a little boy's cake, can we? So . . .
That first cake is just odd. I can't see it having appealed to me at any age for any reason.
The second cake I would have really liked as a child and I know my little niece would like it now.
The last two cakes I would have refused to eat and there would likely have been tears involved...especially after the other kids heard me declare "They're dead!" and possibly blame the apartheid. I was an odd child.
@Dolphin; Phillipas is the Greek version of Phillip.
As for the headless one, you guys, AH is for the cake recipients, Anna and Haley. :-)
Wrecky Replay, good post but Wrecky Replay noted
[Editor's note- Yup. We usually do them on Wednesday but we had a new post for National Punctuation Day so we moved it forward a day. -john]
So this is weird... this was the post from my birthday, 9/25. And like the child of one of the earlier commenters, I would also have loved the dino cake when I was four. AND, like the person who posted that comment about her kid, my name is ALSO Dana.
I think what it adds up to is the universe requiring a dino cake for my birthday next year.
Time to note an unambiguous wreck. At a funeral for a child, I saw many floral arrangements which included stuffed animals. One stuffed animal, however, had Xs for eyes.
After reading the thread, I find myself in love with mel. Darling hilarious mel. Yummy delicious mel.
Are you taken yet precious?