Weekly Wreck Up 2/20/14
February 20, 2014 Some of my favorites that came in this week:
I've had some time to think about it, guys, and I've finally decided:
;)
I'm really NOT ready for some football, thanks.
I'll also pass on these:
;)
Something something TOOT SWEET. Haha!
(Let's see, so that's 4 fartlets to a toot, two toots to a squelch, and three squelches to a change of undies, am I right?)
One of the best patch jobs I've seen in ages:
;)
LIKE A NINJA.
Ah, look! The Great Poo-Nugget Migration!
;)
Really moving, isn't it?
We've had a bunch of late Valentine cakes come in, and I have to say, you wreckerators had a red-letter year! In fact, you could say...
;)
Torn between disappointment and relief there's no nekkid Miley on there.
;)
This and "Huge Me," man; they just never get old.
;)
"Drat, there's only room for one more letter, and I need to spell "YOU!"
[head tilt]
[Jeopardy theme playing]
"Guess I'll go with the Y, then."
Thanks to Angie T., Mindy M., Lisa R., Martina T., Rebecca C., Esmeralda O., & Stacey for making my week.
*****
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Reader Comments (41)
Sung to "What a Wonderful World"
I hear footballs scream
While fartlets spew
See ninja stealth
Follow the poo
And I think to myself
These are wonderful wrecks
There's a ball for you
VD on white
Y doesn't need
OU tonight
And I think to myself
These are wonderful wrecks.
That first cake looks more like the rotisserie chicken advertised on the sticker than a cake/pie/baked good thing.
The "fartlets"? Well I almost fell off my stool! HA get it? Yeah, I know, go get some more coffee, Heloise.
Did you notice that the football was planted in a deli rotisserie chicken???
Sung to the Jeopardy Thinking Theme:
Take the football, leave the cake
Key lime fartlets: silent, deadly, great
And when it's [ ] [ ] birthday time
Watch Poo Nuggets make that climb
It's quite moving, that's not all
Here's a charming cookie wrecking ball
VD's funny, that's still true
Truer still is I -- Love -- Y
That first....cake...is that a cake with a football embedded in it, inside a rotisserie chicken container? Is this a cake so badly done it can pass for meat? I did see a pudding cake label on the left. So bizarre!
1st photo: Burnt, broke, and rubbery isn't quite the way I like my chicken served. (The sticker reads: "PUDDING CAKE TRAY".)
#4: I can almost hear David Attenborough's voice whispering that one! ("uglypooflowers", according to the actual photo credit!) =^e.e^=
I lost it at the "Fartlets" and the accompanying commentary.
Also, bravo to Sharyn and SuBee for the hilarious song parodies, as always.
Oh, my gawd! My face aches from smiling so hard.
Pure brilliance again! Don't know how you manage to match such hilarious commentary with such perfectly wrecked cakes day after day, Jen, but I'm SO grateful that you find a way!
Oh dear, Jen. What wonderful, witty, funny commentary today!! Thank you for many many belly laughs.
Suebee and sharyn thanks for the laughs. As for the cakes O.o
I love y Cake Wrecks!
@Stephanie - exactly! And I had just the other day watched the movie of "Shrek: The Musical" -- how appropriate...
Not only does the first cake have the Rotisserie Chicken label AND a pudding tray label...do they NOT know English? But the words above Rotisserie Chicken looks like why CO¢K tonight? I KNOW it says COOK, but that second "O" is a bit too close to the "K", mmmK? Sharyn and SuBee, brilliant as always. I love coming here in the morning, it sort of sets the tone for the day. Yesterday I found my self doing laps in the pool and laughing while remembering CW. Other swimmers looked a bit worried, and NOT AMUSED...At least I didn't guffaw in the pool, the lifeguard would not have been happy to rescue a laughing maniacal swimmer...have a great day all!!! :+)
That first thing is...nauseus making!
Why are the poo nuggets bringing salad along on their trudge? Do poo nuggets get hungry? (What are those things actually SUPPOSED to be? They confound me!)
A chicken-flown coop.
In dinner's place, all we have
is a leather egg.
Those poo nuggets scare me. A lot! O.O
Thanks for helping with my diet. I haven't eaten much in the last week and I'm feeling a little queasy now.
Those last ones look like treats that Thurston Howell III would give his beloved.
And I'll bet those confections in picture #2 have an AMAZING aroma.
Haiku Joy-- Lovely!
As for the first entry today; I believe it is a pie (and you cannot shake my belief) with a plastic football smashed into it's middle-ish. The label says "Why cook tonight? **Deli Rotisserie Chicken**"
They want you to buy the unappetizing smush and get a chicken from the same store to round out your dinner. If this is the mess they make of bundt cake (yes, I see that it is an assortment of bundt cake slices), I'd hate to see what they do to the chickens.
The container with the words "Deli Rotisserie Chicken" is advertising rotisserie chicken on the Baked goods container. A certain grocery store chain does this. It had me puzzled when I bought turnovers, but the first thing I saw on the lid was something about baguettes.
Having said that, it does look like the football is inside a [moldy] roast chicken! Or something equally unappetizing!
You've got it all wrong on the eclairs, the wreckerator isn't trying to say "I love you" but rather he/she is singing their own praises with the usual bad grammar, they are saying how beautiful they are "I lovely" except they can't spell, so they say "I lovey" Either that or she trying to tell the public that she is Mrs Thurston Howell III. Or isn't there a football player or coach with the first name of Lovey? So many options, but still hilarious, thanks Jen for the gut busting laugh a day posts
Bravo! Haiku Joy. Another stellar work of poetry.
A week ago today, I was introducing the pilot of the plane I was flying in to the joys of Cakewrecks. Why you ask? He'd bought a supermarket cake for his wife for Valentine's day, and the decorator did a HIDEOUS job inscribing it. Was I surprised? Of course not. He was impressed with the CW website, and we didn't crash, so all is good. Perhaps we'll see his cake posted here soon....
One last attempt at "something-akin-to-sense": MAYBE the first offering was supposed to be a sort of party platter thing for the Super Bowl? ? Think about it! It has all the mostly-guy type of stuff (you know, burnt and probably tripped-over food, and that football toy to toss around during halftime)...What do you think? Anyone?
A trail of slime or poo. I can't decide which. Now I want donuts. Nothing says I love you like a cake with a wrecking ball on it.
When I was little, my nickname was "Lovie" (which I grew to HATE) can also be spelled "Lovey." I may have said "I Lovey" when introducing myself before I knew how to use the be verb.
After a perfectly horrendous day (ex.:I got rearended in my work truck-my 2 day old 313 miles on it work truck!) I sat down at my computer and said "I need CAKEWRECKS!" Thank God for all of you on here----a smiling end to a crappy crappy (but not as crappy as these cakes!) day.
Just so's you know: the braille contraction for the word "you" is the letter y (it's an alphabet whole word contraction). I'll bet the baker was simply trying to be inclusive.
Or something.
We could use the "I Love Y" eclairs over here in Tampa for our new head Bucs football coach, Lovey Smith! I bet he'd appreciate them.
The eclairs were for an algebra class. That is my theory, which it is, and it is mine, too.
My favorite is the eclairs, because it requires commitment. The wreckerator wrote "I love y" and was out of room. A normal person would think, "maybe there is a better way to do this, like with a u or a heart instead of 'love.'" But not this wreckerator, they want them all the same. So if the first one is wrong, they will all be wrong. I wonder how far the commitment to this wrong goes. If I go and ask for an eclair that says I love you tomorrow, will I still get I love y?
I love the fill-in-the-blanks approach to the third cake. I'd guess the bakery has a sign like it that says "[BLANK] days since last wreck."
Those look like arrows on those eclairs. Maybe the wreckerator was inspired by his/her love of cream filling???
Those little tartlets are so breezy.
"Like a ninja." Best.
Oh man I honestly hope the fartlets were not at someone's wedding lmao. I could only imagine the bride's reaction if they were. I also love Y so I am happy to note that there are donuts to celebrate this occasion. Lol I can't stop giggling.
It hurts! Both from laughing, and that fact that 3 of those monstrosities came from the company that I work for (not my store mind you, we have standards! lol) Will definitely have to show these to my girls.
No, Excentricat, you will get an eclair that says 'I love you tomorrow'. Or possibly "I love y tmrw", given the perpetrators problem with spacing.
That's not a 'Y', it's a Hebrew 'tsade' (צ). Which is an abbreviation for "North", apparently. So those eclairs are simply expressing their primal desire to migrate...you know, the way pastries tend to do.
"I love y" is indeed a contraction, but not for "you." The Wreckerator was trying to express his/her deep philosophical thoughts on the agonies of love: "I love. Why?"
Glad I'm not the only one who's confused about the football nestled in coffeecake in a container marked Rotisserie Chicken.
As for the fartlets... I don't even know.
for the keylime.... things, i suspect a prankster with a pen.
The treat that's so tweetable,
lusciously eatable,
with that unbeatable sound!
Keylime Fartlets?..................................O.o.....
And the great Poo-nugget Migration?..............................................................O.o O.o O.o O.o O.o O.o...