Eat Your Heart Out, Shakespeare
September 3, 2013 [walking into spotlight]
[striking dramatic pose]
Poo bee...
;)
... or NOT poo bee?
;)
That is the question.
[raising fist to the heavens]
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
the slings and arrows of outrageous fortunes,
;)
Or to take arms against a sea of tribbles!
;)
["Meep?"]
and by opposing...
END THEM.
;)
["MEEP!"]
[raising both arms and bellowing]
Tie dye!!
;)
To seep no more!
And by a sheep,
;)
today we end the heartache
;)
and the thousand natural shocks...
;)
... is that a hair?! EW!
[Ahem.]
'Tis a consummation devoutly to be wished.
;)
Tie dye, to seep, perchance on buttercream!
;)
Aye,
;)
There's the flub.
Blow, winds, and crack your heartfelt thanks to Jennifer T., Janet, Carol F., Lilly P., Amanda M., Alli S., Christy L., Sarah F., Sarah Jane, Brittany B., Paige H., and Karyn T, our Shakespearean pros.
****
PS: Been a while since English Lit 101? Then here, let me google that for you:
"To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether 'tis Nobler in the mind to suffer
The Slings and Arrows of outrageous Fortune,
Or to take Arms against a Sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them: to die, to sleep
No more; and by a sleep, to say we end
The Heart-ache, and the thousand Natural shocks
That Flesh is heir to? 'Tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished. To die, to sleep,
To sleep, perchance to Dream; Aye, there's the rub."
Reader Comments (90)
MEEP!
(I've been lurking for years, but I must admit, this might be my favorite post ever. Great job!)
Ah. Maze. Ing.
Made my whole day.
Who CARES if it's bee "vomit"? It's sweet and pretty, and good for you. Of course, they didn't set out to make it for US, but that's beside the point...
EP...IC...Epic!
Started giggling before I even SAW the first wreck -- POO BEE ... then lost it at MEEP! My little one is impressed that you included Phineas and Ferb, Star Trek AND Puffles from Club Penguin in this post! Amazing job, thanks for the smiles!!
There is nothing either good or bad, but frosting makes it so.
Ah, now I'm thinking of Jean-Luc Picard. I'm okay with that.
Off Topic: The Firstborn has sprung the nest. *sniff*
I'll venture off on to read the past week of comments at some point, but not today. First day back and I really should do some work.
Ha. Perhaps I should have said, "Cake is neither good nor bad, but frosting makes it so"?
I like the Oscar one. Yes that does look like a hair. Maybe eating the cake blindfolded would help.
I came to say the tribbles are adorable, but I see many others beat me to it.
Granted, they are a bit strangely colored, but cute!
Is the cake with strawberries really just a fruited-up Tap Light? It seems like it's ... glowing.
Someone said "well done, Sharyn" so I go up & look for the song...and look...and look again...then realise she wrote the post...*facepalm*
So yeah, well done, Sharyn!
}:)
*Knock Knock Knock! Bang! Bang! " Uh, John? Jen? Anyone? Are you there? I KNOW you are--you OWN the joint! Look, it appears that I'm a sort of "Typhoid Mary" when it comes to making friends around here.That "Will" seemed like a nice (and funny!) guy, and it's MY fault that he left. I feel guilty! I'm willing to (sadly) pack up & never darken your doorstep again if you could talk him into coming back. No one should have to put up with my shenanigans/abuse/idiocy/lovable zaniness...What say you? =^O.0^=
You've heard it so many times today, but- Brava!
(and I also heard it in a masculine British voice. Or maybe that's just because the fall pollen count has risen and I like to put on fake accents when I read Shakespeare in my head.)
I think I need (allergy) drugs.
0o
---
(stunned, awed, amazed silence)
Brava, lady! Wooooo HOOOOOOOO
I've called honey "bee spit" ever since an episode of "Cheers" eons ago where Carla said that to Diane. ;D
@Just Andrea Congrats on getting one out of the hive- er, nest!
@Just Andrea ("Ah, now I'm thinking of Jean-Luc Picard. I'm okay with that.") Mmmm....move over, and I'll be okay with it right along with you! He could read me a bedtime story any night! =^-.-^=
@Just Andrea: "Cake is neither good nor bad, but frosting makes it so"? Nope--that isn't quite doing it either, for me. The syntax is a little "off". How about this: "Cake is either good or bad, and frosting can't hurt." =^0.o^= (Because frosting.)
[striking dramatic pose]
^ I MUST take issue with this. What, pray tell, did the dramatic pose ever do to you, that made you feel compelled to strike it? Poor dramatic pose... :-( (There, there...)
I thought the rainbow tribbles were cute lol. I wouldn't eat them due to the sugary rainbow rush I would get but still kind of adorable. That break up cake would have probably ended up in the givers face if that happened to me. Evil lol.
Sharyn!!!!! Awe. SOME! Love it!
Sharyn, once again your genius knows no bounds!
Now, can we please get Patrick Stewart to read this aloud?
Parody, thy name is Sharyn!
I just finished listening to Hamlet a few days ago, so this was not only perfectly done, but well timed. Thank you.
Anyone think the pink one was trying to be a razorback before its eye fell off?
Oh, and I do like the puffballs, both green & rainbow-colored, although I kinda want to punt the day-glo ones across the room. Koosh ball, anyone?
OK, what's up with the puking poo bees?
The rainbow tribbles are adorable! :-) I showed my 10yr old and he asked where we could get one.
The poo bees however, freak me out! Well done! ;-)
Wow, thanks Sharyn, that was indeed awesome. Or awefull - I am full of awe!
Oddly, I was running this through my mind last night for no particular reason.
BUT You forgot the rest!
To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether 'tis Nobler in the mind to suffer
The Slings and Arrows of outrageous Fortune,
Or to take Arms against a Sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them: to die, to sleep
No more; and by a sleep, to say we end
The Heart-ache, and the thousand Natural shocks
That Flesh is heir to? 'Tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished. To die, to sleep,
To sleep, perchance to Dream; Aye, there's the rub,
For in that sleep of death, what dreams may come,
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause. There's the respect
That makes Calamity of so long life:
For who would bear the Whips and Scorns of time,
The Oppressor's wrong, the proud man's Contumely,
The pangs of despised Love, the Law’s delay,
The insolence of Office, and the Spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When he himself might his Quietus make
With a bare Bodkin? Who would Fardels bear,
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscovered Country, from whose bourn
No Traveller returns, Puzzles the will,
And makes us rather bear those ills we have,
Than fly to others that we know not of.
Thus Conscience does make Cowards of us all,
And thus the Native hue of Resolution
Is sicklied o'er, with the pale cast of Thought,
And enterprises of great pitch and moment,
With this regard their Currents turn awry,
And lose the name of Action. Soft you now,
The fair Ophelia? Nymph, in thy Orisons
Be all my sins remembered
To carry on the speech another line: "For in that sleep of death what dreams may come..." Suppose in Hell we were surrounded by all the wrecked cakes we've seen on this blog all this time ... DON'T DO IT, HAMLET!
@Marv: I do NOT understand the writing 100%, word-for-word, and may not be capable of that. It's almost like a foreign language to me. But LISTENING to it, it can move me. Go figure!
You are a genius. My sides hurt. And now I desperately want my actor friends to use this variation of the monologue in auditions.
O wonderful, wonderful, most wonderful wonderful, and yet again wonderful, and
after that, out of all whooping!
It dates me, but when I read it the voice was Lawrence Olivier.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ks-NbCHUns (he starts speaking after the first minute)
@Barbara Anne: Teehee! Thanks.
@sendingtheclowns: LOL! : - D
BRAVA!!!!
One question: Is that a sheep or Marie Antoinette???
@Just Andrea ~ My first born flew the coop this year but it was more of a traumatic experience for all of us. My youngest started school today. WOO and two HOO's!!!
Genius! You had me at "poo bee."
Apparently someone at the Folger Shakespeare Library in DC is a fan of Cake Wrecks, as this post was linked in their E-mail to subscribers this week: https://www.magnetmail.net/actions/email_web_version.cfm?recipient_id=730884476&message_id=2923016&user_id=folger&group_id=59901&jobid=14986162
This is. My favorite Sharyn Post. EVER. EVAR. I mean, seriously. creativity and hilariosity off the charts, here. If you did an entire cakewrecks book in shakespere/literary mock ups, I would totally buy it! :D
There are soooo many funny moments in this post I don't even know where to begin! MEEP!
I love it! And I love the rainbow tribbles. I would totally have those. I also like the green tribble "underneat" them, but that's for the expression on his face!
I have to say...I love the "traditional" sticker on the sheep cake.
Brilliant! Beyond brilliant!
Still one of my favorite posts. =-)