Friday
Aug092013
Expect Less. Laugh More.
August 9, 2013 Have a heart, bakers.
;)
Don't do this:
;)
And never promise the bride this:
;)
When you're going to deliver this:
;)
Hey, while I've got you here, let's talk about zebra stripes:
;)
THESE ARE ZEBRA STRIPES.
These, on the other hand ...
;)
Well, I'm pretty sure those are zebra sperm.
But then again, things tend to be pretty black and white with me.
And finally, bakers, just because you might question a couple's choice for their wedding cake order:
;)
... that's no reason to punish them further!
;)
("Hey, you with the shotgun. Put this cake out of its misery.")
Thanks to Anony M., Courtney T., Michelle T., & RT for the bang-up job hunting these down.
Reader Comments (58)
@KarateLady ~ I'm 5'5" also. I KNOW you're not really tiny just like I KNOW Craig isn't 7 feet tall. The image in my head still makes me giggle tho.
@Just Andrea ~ Very politically correct ;-)
So I know the Zebra stripes look like sperms...but in the decorators defense....those squigly black lines are what the cake design calls for when it is ordered out of the book of designs. I personally have made that cake at least a dozen times at work. And that picture is exactly how it should look.
Ah-ha! My cynical mind just awoke to the connection:
The link to the Cake Craft Shoppe discounted cake decorating supplies virtually guarantees the unlimited supply of Cake Wreck examples!
Way to go, Jen! :)
As a very proud cake decorator, I am appalled at some (almost all) of these creations... but, as far as the zebra "sperm" cake goes, I would like to come to the decorator's defense: it is a design in a book that a customer chose for them to recreate and it is almost exactly like the picture. It was done fairly well. I have had to do a cake like that one, and I, too, referred to it as the zebra sperm cake, but it's not fair to the decorator to insult them for doing what the customer asked. Thank you and that is all. :)
Omg. I seriously believe that the "zebra sperm cake" is a cake I personally did at walmart. Although that cake is in the book of cakes that walmart bakers do, I ALWAYS made sure that my polka dots were flat, with no point from the tip of the icing bag. However- it is exactly what the costumer wanted. There IS a zebra design which I had done before, however we make sure when they picked out that exact cake ( the one pictured) we ask " do you want it as shown, or with zebra stripes" " no I like the squiggles" okay. That cake looks EXACTLY as shown in the booklet of creations walmart has. Check out my other cakes on my Facebook- who got tips as a walmart worker? This gal!! https://m.facebook.com/bridget.smith.1426?v=photos&psm=default&album=a.10152504295365408.946244.547510407&__user=547510407 all of them were done @ walmart by me.
I totally can relate to the white wedding cake. Mine looked horrible and tasted even worse. :( It was supposed to have lovely scroll work and fresh roses. We were given a joke. The scroll work was not elegant, it was choppy, you could tell their was loads of air in the piping bag and she sprinkled the lopsided mess with fake rose petals that stained the icing. :/ The scroll work on the grooms cake was awful as well, but his still looked and tasted better. :/ $300 for a small groom's cake and way more on the crappy wedding cake. :( If I ever get married again, I am totally having my friend (we became friends years after my wedding) make it. She owns her own bakery and knows what she is doing. ;) I will say, she couldn't help but laugh when I showed her the photos of my terrible cakes. HAHA! She could tell me EVERYTHING the lady did wrong. HA!
I'd just like to say, in regards to the two-tiered, sweet sixteen cake, that cake is not the decorator's fault, it's the customer's. The finished product is exactly what the cake looks like in the book, designs that the decorators don't come up with. It is a Walmart cake, and a customer cannot come into Walmart with a picture of a cake all decorated in fondant and expect Walmart to replicate it exactly for $48, especially when Walmart doesn't even work with fondant, and the cake was ordered with whipped icing.
I lost it at "zebra sperm".