John tells me our readership took a hit this past month, and he couldn't figure out what had changed until someone mentioned everyone's back in school now. A-ha! Of course.
So just to show that Cake Wrecks is nothing if not educational, I've whipped up a handy lesson guide for all you teachers out there. Now you can take the night off and catch up on the wreckage! Then tomorrow just fire up the overhead projector, and allow me to educate our future leaders. (No, no, don't cry; I do this because I care.)
An Educational Overview from Cake Wrecks
Grammar time! (Can't wreck this! Whoah-OH!)
Students, today we're going to look at how your lessons apply in the real world. Pay attention, because the pop quiz starts...now.
It's quite common for people to confuse "you're" and "your." Here's a simple way to remember which is witch:
This is correct:
Although it should be noted that owning an old Kurt in this day and age will never be "right."
Next, this rhyme can really come in handy for your spelling skills:
Quotation marks are vital for indicating when you're quoting someone verbatim or just being really, really sarcastic:
*Asterisks often denote footnotes, albeit sometimes invisible ones. Invisible footnotes are the work of the Knights Templar, and should be reported to Dan Brown "immediately."
A homonym (n) is each of two different words having the same pronunciation but different meanings, spellings, or both.
For example, "here" is where we are now:
While "hear" is what we do with our ears:
Next time we'll also discuss properly distinguishing your cursive "w"s from your "m"s.
Luckily, putting the proper endings on number contractions like first, second and third is as easy as 1th, 2th, 3th!
Well, I'm sure this lesson has been super helpful, students, so for your homework I want you all to show your teacher what you've just learned with an informative drawing. Bonus points if you use sprinkles. Or bring cake to class. Or write a sonnet entitled, "Why Jen from Cake Wrecks Deserves an Honorary PhD and also a Working Proton Pack, If Possible."
Now, chop chop!
Oh, and next week: biology!
Thanks to Ruth, Shane S., Gal N., Beth N., Brandi H., Amy S., Carla D., Margaret J., Maria R., Sarah R., Christina M., Nicole S., Michele T., & Jess for believing the children are our future. And for teaching them "well" and letting them lead the weigh.
PS - Believe it or not, I actually DO hear from a lot of teachers who use CW in the classroom. Here's a fun example. Now, don't you have a sonnet to write?