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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Jul202012

10 Oddly Specific Apology Cakes

Far be it from me to ever condemn an apology made with cake.

However....

Today's cakes do make me question being quite so specific about it.

Hey, I just realized this should have been the #1 apology cake for my Go-Go song!

 

And maybe these were the accompanying cupcakes?

(It says, "Sorry you fell in my pee.")

 

Now I know why most funeral receptions only serve pie.

 

Anyone else getting a passive-aggressive vibe here?

 

Very funny, Dad.

 

Oh, sure, THIS you can spell. Forget "congratulations," forget "birthday," "GONORRHEA" is the word you get right?! I just...I can't...I don't even...

 

And what are you smiling about?

This is actually adorable. Assuming it's a joke, of course.
If not, then it's adorable *and* hilarious.

 

This was a dispute between two chefs, kids. Chefs who are overly fond of their cookware. Honest.

 

Gentlemen, you know how sometimes you know you need to apologize, but you don't know what to apologize FOR?

This works.

 

And finally, my favorite apology cake EVER:

Although I can't help imagining the cake exchange going something like this:

"I am a woman."

"Then I'm sorry for second-guessing myself."

...Just because it makes me giggle.

 

Thanks to LW, Jacqueline P., Michelle B., Michelle M., Andrew C., Andrew F., Heather, Ian S., Anony M., Sara W. for taking the lower high road.

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Reader Comments (69)

Does No. 3 actually say "sorry about your dead dud"? What can that mean? I think we should be told...

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterdocbanger

BWA HA HA HA HAHA...i have never laughed so hard at one of these posts until I saw the "sorry I thought you were a woman" cake. I can barely breathe I'm laughing so hard!!

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterShannon

Sung to “It’s the End of the World as We Know it (I Feel Fine)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jVmB3lRjCmc

OK, it starts with a bed cake, I had too much to drink and, yes, I peed there, I’m afraid. I was in a hurry see, it started to burn, so I served my own needs, then you fell in my pee. Feed yourself a cupcake, oops, dead dad, but hey you got a cake so it’s not too bad. Walking all around me, and you all lame, but I wrote you an apology on cake so white. Sure I slept with your Mom but she’s really pretty hot so I thought “What the Heck?” You got gonorrhea, baffled, dumped, booted, dropped. But your cake has curling ribbon. Fine, then. Uh oh, here we go, copulation, pretty good, ‘til you got crabs. Here’s a cake, serve yourself. I needed to make soup so I took your pot, geez, yummy it was rapture, but it was also stupid, right, right? Sorry that I thought you were a woman, don’t fight, here’s a cake to make it right.

See, I got the last word and you know it.
See, I got the last word and you know it.
See, I got the last word and you know it, so I feel fine.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Funny! I think the "I'm sorry I peed in your bed." one may be my fave, but they are all pretty wacky. I can't imagine apologizing for those kinds of things via a personalized cake. haha

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSheri in Reho

The chocolate " pot " cake looks really delicious lol.... i wonder if they um... returned the pot - with the cake - wink wink.


Disclaimer to anyone that knows me and reads this hilarious blog ... i have never in my life smoked pot not even a cigarette

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDiana

Actually, I think the last one says "Sorry I thought you were a women". Plural..maybe a really large man/woman?

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterfuturemrslittle

Oh, good! Now I know how to apologize the next time my potty-training toddler pees on someone's floor. This makes my life SO much easier.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCarolynn the Dyer

I'm pretty sure that last cake says "I'm Sorry I Thought You Were a WomEn".

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMargaret

Do I see two spelling errors on the final cake? "Sorry" looks like "sorey" to me. Also, as an English teacher, I harass the heck out of my students for repeatedly confusing "woman" and "women" - a mistake they NEVER make with "man" and "men"??? This cake may just become one of my examples since that last word appears to be "women" instead of "woman." I love all of them!

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTracey

That last cake would have to be given to someone you just met, right? So the person who gave it must have felt really, really, bad to think an apology cake was necessary.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSydney

HAHAHA Oh dear. Humanity's ability to spell gonorrhea right and congratulations wrong is both ironic and just as disturbing!

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterStoich91

Having been peed on twice in the past week (I hasten to add I work in an infant school) a cake saying sorry would have been much appreciated......

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

I imagine the first two confections in a hospital setting. Nurses and orderlies would probably love it if they got cakes every time they had to deal with someone else's bodily fluids.

Too bad we can't see the rest of the writing on the chocolate ganache cake. The whole thing says "Sorry I Stole Your Pot And Ate Your First Apology Cake When I Got the Munchies."

Serry I slep* witb yair man, whatever that means.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

Bwahahahaha XD XD XD Those are so funny. I agree, if the crabs cake was a joke, it's cute and well done :D. Lol@Sharyn. 8D

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

"Not a woman! Not a woman!" if you don't get that quote, watch this:
http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=willow+not+a+woman+scene&mid=EF197857E23D88C590FCEF197857E23D88C590FC&view=detail&FORM=VIRE1

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDena

Is it just me or are the green roses on the last cake just kind of disturbing? I can see it now, the baker is trying to figure out how to decorate the cake so it will be nice without making it girly. So there have to be roses, but they can't be girly colors. Yeah, that kind of greyish green will do just fine.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBeesMom

I'm sorry I never received an apology cake from anyone...

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Yup, cake #4 definitely has a passive-aggressive vibe.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterFiona

I admit it, I make at least 2 visits to CW every morning. The first is to see the hilarious wrecks & accompanying commentary. The second is for Sharyn's Sing-a-Long :) As usual, I was not disappointed.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

1. I think yellow airbrushing on that cake may have been a mistake...."I'm sorry I peed in your bed, and possibly on your apology cake".

2. I'm sorry I can't read chocolate scribbles. Thanks for the translation.

3. The dead dad cake is way too cheerful.

4. Cake accepted. Apology? Not so much.

5. Hehe. "Very funny, Dad" Heehee.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

I scrolled past that last cake a little to quickly and somehow my brain read "I'm sorry I thought you were a unicorn"....

Dang, these are funny!

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKathleen

I think that there is a misprint on #8.
Shouldn't it say "Sorry I SOLD your pot?"
Because if the pot was stolen, don't you think the cake would be half eaten?

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJack Wire

I'm somehow usually able to stay fairly composed when reading cake wrecks (I try not to draw too much attention to myself at work), but I about lost it on "Sorry you fell in my pee." Oh man, those are awesome things to have to apologize for! (And I'm pretty sure the last cake was made in Canada, as evidenced by the use of "sorey"--you don't get that long "o" sound with the traditional spelling.)

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHeath

Hehe, the last one made me think of Austin Powers--"It's a man, baby!"

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea H.

Hey I have a favorite stock pot and if someone lifted it I'd go on a hunt with my meat cleaver to get it back.

On a serious note, why do cakes like this happen. You'd think decorators would not want to write such things on the top of something to be eaten....Then again we get ultrasound tummy and dead baby operation too so meh.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterIsolder74

So, I'm trying to figure out if there is some sort of hidden message in the color choices of the 4th one. Why are "around" and "bad knees" in purple, while the rest is in green?

I love that the "Sorry I slept with your mom" cake (if you give them the benefit of the doubt with that iffy writing) also has the happy "Thanks for shopping at Ralph's" sticker on the outer plastic shell.

This is one day I feel for the people in the bakery who take the orders and have to write this stuff. "You want the cake to say WHAT? Okaaaay...."

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTwinMom

Hey, I was wondering if anyone had seen this 3d food printer on Youtube. It really opens up a whole new world of Wreckiness, with TECHNOLOGY! I( put it as my personal URL if links aren't allowed in comments.) It's pretty cool anyhow.

youtube.com/watch?v=2GcC2vcFiQw&feature=player_embedded

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterpinkfizzy

The first two are obviously from dogs.

I can't begin to think about what to do with #3.

#4 What's with the different colors -- is this a fill-in-the-blank cake? A cakey Mad Lib? "Sorry to make you walk sideways looking for me, what with your fear of crustaceans, and all." Odd use of the Oxford comma, though.

#7 Speaking of crustaceans... It's always nice when the fishmonger apologizes for messing up the order. Maybe next time, he'll remember the lobster.

#8 Perhaps this is a companion to the cupcakes.

#9 should be in every wreckorator's catalog.

#10 Another example of how a missing comma creates a subtle change of meaning. Not, "I'm sorry, I thought you were a woman," but "I'm sorry I thought you were a women." Which doesn't really make sense, in any event. Of course, the precise way to mollify a male victim of gender misidentification is with a frilly cake. Unless as Jen opines, the recipient really is a woman, in which case the sender takes snark to a whole new level.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

I hate to admit it, but I think I understand the pee cakes. I'm pretty sure a human purchased them on behalf of a pet with a weak bladder. It's the kind of thing my mom would do.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKristin

All I gotta say is...I wonder how the decorators felt when they got those cake requests... o_O

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDenita TwoDragons

I am trying unsuccessfully to imagine what it would be like ordering one of these cakes. What would that conversation be like?

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterVicky A

The "Sorry I thought you were a woman" cake reminds me of Emily Howard from "Little Britain". "But I really am a laaddy!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXPGwqPiR0k&feature=youtube_gdata_player

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAudrey

The "Sorry I Peed In Your Bed" Cake is awesome. I am laughing out loud at my office looking at it.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterer

I have a friend that drank a little too much one night, passed out on a guys bed we went to school with and peed in it. I still LMAO about it to this day.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAngyla

Those first two cakes concerning pee could be from my small daughter! LOL! And the pot cake looks yummy!

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPam

@Sharyn, I love you.

The crabs/birthday cake could have been for my friend, Dana, who is deathly allergic to shellfish but loves sweets. And has a birthday.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRobynR

I'm sorry I slept with your Mom?

I think you're right. It's a cake from Dad and it's the best birthday cake slogan, ever!

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRhissanna

"Sorry I slept with your mom" is my favorite, but why is there a heart on the cake??? "Sorry I slept with your mom, but luv ya!"

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterFlower Girl

sorry i'm so stupid or i was so stupid is the universal apology.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterjane lewis

I agree with Craig. Although, I am also thinking that other than the STD cakes (Dear god I cannot believe I just typed that), they are ALL from a dog.

Dogs are great.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

Why is "Sorry you got gonorrhea!" so darn perky about it? Shouldn't it at least be a frowny face among all the sprinkles and that curling ribbon?

And who is that from? It could have been "Sorry I gave you gonorrhea!" but it isn't. Is it a cheer-up cake from a friend? That would have to be one really close friend. Maybe it's an informational cake from the public health department and there's a comma missing after "Sorry".

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDee Ann

Once when we were kids, my brother (who sleep-walked a lot) overshot the bathroom and peed in my bed. I woke up to find him standing by my bed, and suddenly I noticed to my horror that my bed was getting really warm. I'm still mad at him. I think he owes me that first cake.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJeanette

I think the best part is the exclamation point after "i'm sorry about your dead dad" It just seems...cheerier that way.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterthe_din

I really can't choose between my favourite of these beauties.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenteranne

Look closely at the last one. It says: "I'm sorry I thought you were a women". So the person who ordered the cake thought the person he was apologizing to was MORE than one woman? Women? whatever? Now I've confused myself.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergabsmom

Cake # 11: "Sorry I told some Baker about all of our personal problems an you'll never be able to buy a glazed doughnut again."

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

There has to be a follow-up apology for all of those, "Sorry I gave you an inappropriate cake." As a side note, Apology Cake would be a good band name.

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterClip Snark

What cracked me up were the curly decorations on the STD cake. They are reminiscent of spirochetes, which are characteristic of the bacteria that cause syphilis, not gonorrhea. A for spelling, D for biology!

July 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermamagotcha

My kids owe me those pee cakes. Not that I would eat something called a pee cake.

I have heard the two chefs have reconciled. After smoking a peace pipe, of course.

July 21, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterpikkewyntjie

'Sorry I slept with your mom' sounds perfect for a soon-to-be-ex stepchild.

July 21, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMarkM

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