Vehicular Cakeslaughter

Every now and then - and I'm not saying this happens often - professional bakers have a little trouble making cakes that look like...well, anything. (See examples here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here .)

Perhaps hardest of all is the vehicle cake. There's just something about all those shapes and circles and squares that drives even the most hardened Shop-a-Lot Davinci to edible clip art with the watermarks still on:

Now, if only we had a picture of chocolate drizzle and sprinkles...

So let's say you want KITT from Knight Rider on your cake:

Binka binka binka binka dinka binka dinka binka...

[That was me singing the theme song. Obviously.]

Rather than attempt the entire car, your baker might try to home in on KITT's most distinguishing feature:

The ketchup-and-mustard smear under his seat.

Or how about this tractor?

At first glance, you might think this could be broken down into a simple drawing of two boxes on two wheels.

BUT YOU WOULD BE WRONG.

It's an extremely complicated design, and rendering it in icing is so unbelievably difficult that the finished product would be far beyond the bounds of mere mortal comprehension.

Yeah. Like that.

And finally, let's say your child wants a school bus cake:

(Oh, you know this is going to be good.)

You might end up with this:

It's not short. It's "fun sized!"

Thanks to Andie K., Brooke & Mike K., Lea B., & Pete H. for keeping us on track today.

Comments

[jeliecam]

The bus is for Clown School.
It's much bigger on the inside.

wv: sphift - that tractor didn't look very sphift, but then nothing runs like a deere

[Anonymous]

Maybe they should go back to cooking school or something.

[Kirk]

love your posts. nice cake pictures!

[Isolder74]

@ Craig

What makes it worse is I make mine as a hobby. These are expected for people to actually PAY for!

[Anonymous]

"Michael, this cake is not an accurate representation of my laser sensor. I believe it more closely resembles a belt with a huge buckle."

Bwahahahaha!!!

[snuzzle]

Love the last one! "It's a school bus, duh! See? It even says so RIGHT ON THE BUS."

When in doubt, label it out!

[Sarah]

Just for kicks and giggles, I went and read every link at the top of the page in "here, here, here...and here" and I'm so disappointed! The second half of them are just repeats. :( Well, that's what I get for being curious. xD

[Lori]

Just when I think I've seen it all.... the watermark. THE WATERMARK, PEOPLE!!!! how d'ya... i mean if you just stand back... i just.... but you see....

sigh.

[Haiku Joy]

Happy birthday, Mike!
We couldn't afford KITT, so
next best! Slap bracelet!

[kayk]

I thought the KITT cake took an intereting minimalist approach -- if you were a real fan, you'd probably know what it was supposed to represent!

[telecomladyj]

I am *shocked*
SHOCKED!!!
You didn't think I'd click on all those 'here' links did you? DID YOU????
Surely not or you wouldn't have duplicated the same few over and over and over.
I give and I give..... *SOB*

[Bob the Skull]

The tractor cake isn't messed up. It's Cubist.