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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
May042011

Class Acts

Hey there, teachers! This week is for you! So, in honor of Teacher Appreciation Week, we'd like to say thanks to all teachers, past and present, the only way we know how:


With embarrassingly ironic school cakes.
It's the least we can do for you, teachers. After all, you've taught us so many invaluable lessons.

 

 

Like punctuation...
Read this out loud. You'll sound like "William," "Shatner."

...basic math...
I'm guessing the flux capacitor costs extra.
...and creative writing!
This is why you don't submit cake orders via Twitter.
Yes, teachers, if you hadn't taught us these basic skills, we might end up looking like total boobs!
And just think what would happen to our stick-figure drawing skills!
You're responsible for molding us from the very beginning...
Sure, just put those letters anywhere.
...all the way into adulthood, preparing us for the outside world!
I gradulate this wreckorator for making me water the keyboard. Through my nose.
So, teachers, we salute you - because even if I broke the safety scissors, slept through class, and skipped most of Senior year...
...I don't think I turned out so bad, after all.

 

 

Thanks to Aimee S., Anonymous 1 & 2, Cassandra B., Cassie P., Holly H., Jennifer C., and Sarah F. for these school house wrecks.

 

Say, have you thanked a teacher today?

 

« I'll Drink to That! | Main | Dear Go d, the Irony »

Reader Comments (107)

I love the Kindergarden Grad one

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBillyBites

Do people really get kids cake for graduating kindergarten? I didn't get cake for that.

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

I love the stick-boob cake. (What else do you call that anyway?) But I AM envious of the wreckerator's penmanship. It looks really good!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

I thought it was so odd the first time I heard of a kindergarden or elementary school that had a full graduation ceremony. I mean, really!?

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

it is a shame about that one cake, because the writing on it was soooo nice... and, on another note, I'm pretty mad at my mother now! She never threw me a Kindergarten grad party and got me cake!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSara

Does that stick figure have boobs?

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJoy

That's awesome. My finance and I are both educators, and I can't wait to show these to him when we're together again. :-)
Rachel

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHistorian

#5, beautiful writing. I guess if you attend 'Kiddie Kollege' the best you can expect is to be a 'graduit'.

And poorly Harlie Jo on that last cake. Poo-colored flowers!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The writing on the Kindergarten College cake is really fantastic - too bad icing doesn't come with spell check...

WV: prending. These wreckerators were only prending they knew how to spell.

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda Mac

It's almost as if the person who decorated the last cake, with the perfect straight line and even decorations, was not the person who added the "amazing" lettering. Whew!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbassgirl

Reads like William Shatner...Bwahahahahaha!

Love it!

I cringe every time I see someone spell Congratulations wrong.

Sharon's Edible Art

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

Spelling 'congratulations' correctly and then misspelling 'graduates' on the same cake is like scoring a goal for the other team. Googly moogly.

Our teachers would order cakes for faculty and make bets on whether or not it would arrive correctly punctuated and spelled. I have to order a cake for my little one's birthday today, I was toying with calling it in. You made my decision for me!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Spelling 'congratulations' correctly and then misspelling 'graduates' on the same cake is like scoring a goal for the other team. Googly moogly.

Does The cryptic Twitter cake have a translation?

H B-day = Happy Birthday
At Got Wait = And Graduation
At Mk At DSb = And may you get all you Deserve

Didn't know Nell was a cake decorator. Good for her!

WV: antskst " it was with great antskst and a mild eye twitch that I decoded the writing on the cake."

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSusana

I think the flowers/lettering on the last one are supposed to be "dusky purple" rather than "excrement brown."

If it weren't for the colors being an exact match, I'd suspect that one of poor Harlie Jo's "parents" added the "inscription" later.

(Yay for gratuitous "quote marks"!)

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterpoisonheart

I can't wait to show these to my son when he gets home from kimderten this afternoon.

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm glad I'm not the only one who took note of all the celebration for kindergarten graduation. Back when I was in kindergarten, we got a party on the last day and snarky comments from our parents about going into 1st grade. LOL

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRoseAnn

Does anyone have a translation for the "Twitter cake"? I cannot parse it into any coherent thought!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterflying gargoyle

No Star Wars wrecks for May the 4th?!? I'm shocked! Not that these weren't wrecky greatness, though!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

VW - It seems these cakes were decorated rather uncerly.

Um, ok, you've made it through Kindergarten - get on with your life ok? :D

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

In the wreckerator's defense for the 1976 cake, it doesn't say 40th ANNUAL Reunion. It is very possible this is the 40th time they're reunited as a class since 1976, we'll just never know...

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRenny

The Kiddie Kollege cake (kake?) is beautiful, other than the unfortunate misspelling(s). I dislike when words are purposely misspelled to be alliterative, especially on something that's supposed to be educational.

My kids all had kindergarten graduation, but it was really just a performance of rhymes and songs, and we didn't have cake. The sad thing is, I remember very little of them, other than every class sang "Allison's Camel," and in the "A is for..." recitation in my oldest son's class, 21 years ago, I can remember the little girl who had, "U is for underwear!" but I have no idea what my son's letter was. I am an awful parent. :-P

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMelinda

LOLOLOL but the kiddie kollege might have been spelled that way on purpose-people tend to be cutsey with kid's stuff

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I wonder, are the wreckerators this bad at spelling or is it the people placing the order? and the wreckerator doesn't bother to fix the mistakes or doublecheck the order, they just pipe what they see on the order form? (since they're not paid to think, but to fill the orders on time for minimum wage)

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjo

I'm missing something on the 40th reunion one ... where's the fuzzy math?

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

After 40+ years in the teaching profession, I am deeply moved to see these fabulous cakes.

That's because I teach music, not spelling!

;-)

wv - bozoatin

See the bozoatin that cake? He's a wreckerater trying to hide the evidence the only way he knows how!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEllen

Those round circly things on the "boob" cake look a bit low for boobs. I think they're something else and I think that's a dude.

I am a part-time instructor for a large for-profit university (the one named for a large Southwestern city that runs TV ads constantly - believe me, that tuition ain't goin' to the teachers!) It's an open-enrollment university, which means anyone can get in. Anyone. Now, imagine those cakes in the form of a five-paragraph essay and you'll know what I deal with, but only if the cakes were plagiarized. [Sigh!]

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterpikkewyntjie

Yes, these cakes are just more proof of the silliness of "kinderten" graduation ANYTHING! Puh-leeze.

On the bright side, it's nice to see there are still employment opportunities for those who DON'T "gradulate" from "kinderten."

(Going off to cry now...if you think this is bad, try teaching the kiddies a different language.)

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFlartus

Maybe these wreckerators should go back and "gradute" from "kinderten." Dahaha.

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGoosey

What's with all the people spelling "kindergarten" as "kinderten"? Don't they remember there's a "g" sound in there? Oh, yeah, these are wreckerators we're dealing with....silly me.

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

OMG! I cannot keep from snorting with laughter when I see the latest wrecks! "Stick-boob" cake...priceless!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLabgoddess

I'm surprised you didn't put any Star Wars cakes in today's post. Today is "Star Wars Day" (May the fourth)

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEsther

Now there's a conundrum: two of those cakes say "kinderten", but if they were to add "gar"s, they'd be fish cakes...

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNyperold

Wow. I came in expecting May The Fourth Star Wars goodness. I am disappoint.

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKatjaMouse

HAHAHA! These are sadly hilarious like when my two-year-old falls down hard after spinning in circles and I'm shaking with silent laughter while trying to comfort him. I'm shaking with laughter at these cakes while tying to justify my laughter with the thought that there are still enough smart people in the world to fill 3 spots on Jeopardy! every night. Right? RIGHT???

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

LOL "Graduit" (pronouncing it in my head makes me really laugh)

On a totally unrelated note:
Happy Star Wars Day - May the 4th be with you! :)

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

The message on the fourth cake,

H B-day
At Got wait
At Mk At DSb,

is code! That's how they got Bin Laden!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

I am a teacher eating lunch in my classroom and another teacher came in to check on me I was laughing so hard...I'm just wishing I could teach Kinderten instead of second grade!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJessica S

Perhaps the 40th reunion cake people just like to plan ahead...far ahead....with all that shellac-icing, the cake will probably look the same when 2016 rolls around...

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The Twitter cake gave me a headache and I still don't know what it says. Risking an EPCOT explosion, can anyone translate for a non-texter?

wv: stswit
(I could probably come up with something for that, but the headache prevents it.)

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

Inquiring minds want to know--what happened AFTER the day Julie was born? If I'm reading that cake correctly, that was the last good day and if I were Julie, I might be wondering what I did ;-)

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMonica

My daughter is finishing up kindergarten. I feel the need to order a cake to celebrate. Just to see if they'll mess it up. (Of course they messed up her name last time, so who knows what will happen.)

You missed Star Wars Day, I'm sad. :( May the 4th be with you.

wv: sadrad... what happens when something is so sad it becomes good again, like some of those cakes.

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermimi

@Anonymous at 10:49 AM, the year 1976 was only 35 years ago. By the time the 40th anniversary rolls around, the cake will be quite stale.

All of the cakes are great, but I think my favorite is the first one - how do you screw up "ABC"?! Unbelievable.

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMallie

Kinderten. HA HA HA HA...awesomeness that more than one person got that wrong in the exact same way!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterShannon

Jackson 5 song rewritten:
ACB, as easy as 1,2,3.
As easy as Do, Re, Mi, ACB, that's how easy love can be.

Still rhymes.....

Sharon's Edible Art

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

Classic wrecks! LMAO!!

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

Kids graduate from kindergarten these days? With a cake and everything? Mr. Incredible was right.

wv (before what I was GOING to post vanished into the ether, anyway -- thank you very little, thou demons of 'unable to complete your request', whomever you may be): chymp.

I'll resist temptation and let others insert their own jokes. (Mutter, mutter, new-fangled inventions...consarn blankety-blank computers...)

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

It's May the Fourth, as is, "May the Fourth be with you!"

How in the world did you guys miss "Star Wars Day?!?"

Oh, well, the glories of pathetic spelling always make me laugh (and cringe) anyway.

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterwinsomebulldog

I want to know what the plastic hat in the last picture is covering up on that cake? There is clearly a frosting drawing of something under it! lol

wv: moryl
The moryl of this post is that most of these wreckarators obviously didn't graduate kinderten.

May 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDiane

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