Friday
Apr222011
The Yolk's On Us
April 22, 2011 I'll be posting my Passover greetings this Monday, but in the meantime, allow me to wish the rest of you a truly heartfelt...
And I mean that.All together now! Who are we?
W-R-E-C-K-I-E-S!
And what are we celebrating?
E-D-S-T-E-R!!
It's kind of like Easter, only for people named Ed who have an aversion to script.Of course, to many people Easter is the celebration of Christ's resurrection.
To others, it's the celebration of strung-out bunnies in search of their next omelet.Sometimes this can lead to Easter being accused of over commercialization, and focusing too little on its religious roots. However, when it comes to cake, at least, I think I can speak for us all when I say...
(Photo removed at the request of the baker. Please enjoy this lovely photo of Epcot.)*Let's just stick to wrecking the bunnies.
After all, the lamb cake is often said to represent either the Passover lamb or Christ himself. So with that in mind, look at this cake:
[shiver]Now tell me: which is creepier? That, or...
...this?
Ok, we'll call it a draw.
...excreted an egg.Thanks to Megan C., Kelley N., Lisa B., Byron K., Erin E., Kristy B., & Darla D. for cracking us up. Hard-boiled humor like this always goes over easy.
*The picture we removed was of a cross cake which was a bit wonky, had random decorations and was "decorated" (squirted) with white icing. Really quite lovely especially if you're a fan of king cakes.
Reader Comments (83)
That white plastic bunny with shiny white icing looks delish. Just delish.
Perhaps some nice church could start a fund to bribe Wreckenators stop decorating during this season. The hideous cross and the impaled lamb alone should bring in tons of money for the cause.
However, as an inoffensive heathen, I'm laughing my posterior off, so I wouldn't contribute.
Ok...that HAS to be a chiwawa before that last egg. IT HAS TO BE! CREEPY!
The first cake reminds me of "Smoove B." from The Onion (http://www.theonion.com/personalities/smoove-b,1022/)
Hahahaha...Easter...*sigh* you never cease to amaze... ;D
Egg puns are fun!
Happy Easter
Happy Passover
cc
You totally didn't go the route I thought you might with the " I need eggs" cake. me, I'd have been down a very insensitive path.....
Poor barren bunny. I'd be sad if I couldn't have babies, too.
A marzipan lamb! That's a bizarre Easter tradition that has been frightening children in my family for years! Still, I do think it's much better than the butter lamb. Or is my Mom the only person who goes on a multi-state search for the creepy butter lamb every year?
That plastic wreck looks like an insect--it has a 3-segment body like a white ant!
That pink cupcake plastic bunny thing looks like one of those aliens from Mars Attacks.
That last one is......special....
No, you misunderstand... "Edster" is simply the C&E compliment to "Festivus" for Seculars. ;^)
And those are some scary, scary cakes you have for this Easter Week. How do you sleep at night without seeing them in your dre--, er, nightmares?
As a former puppeteer, no really, I actually got all kinds of warm fuzzies from that scary white plastic bunny cake. The eyes were "peepers." They fit on your finger a bit like a ring to turn your hand into a bare bones puppet. We used to use them during warm ups.
As for religious roots, I would really like to see a zombie Jesus cake to celebrate zombie Jesus day. Really though, the Easter bunny came first {Easter, like Christmas are appropriated from "pagan" holidays).
Who knew there would be so many ways to make a lamb cake horrifying??? When I first saw this one I thought there were a few pieces of severed thumb around it...look, they're there...really.... What a wonderful week of Wrecks! Thank you so much, and, of course, to all who celebrate it, Happy Edster!
wv - canow: is able to, as in Billy canow tie his own shoes.
Is it just me -- and if it is, the therapy costs are going to be prohibitive -- or does that first cake look like it's made out of ham salad? Right down to the bits of pickle relish? It's like something a cannibal would serve, which makes the "Dang Girl, It's Easter" seem more like an explanation. "Dang, Girl, I'm sorry I killed you, but it's Easter and I needed some sandwich spread." Erk.
Oh, and "this" is WAAAAAAY creepier than "that" IMHO. The wet sheen puts it over the top.
Happy Edster -- or your holiday of choice -- to all!
Actually, the flowers on that cross don't look too bad. The cross, on the other hand, seems to be oozing. Ugh.
I'm completely surprised by the sheer amount of Easter wrecks there are! Is Easter even a cake-eating holiday? Who knows, but happy Easter, Good Friday, Passover, etc. More importantly though (or at least EQUALLY important), happy Earth Day! ;)
Ummm, I hate to rain matzoh on your cakes but passover ends next week. It began Monday the 18th.
Giggle. Snort. Best Easter post of the week. Nah--it was way better than that. Best of the YEAR! Snurfle (a stifled snicker).
WV: pilin. You just keep pilin on, don't you?
I am taking comfort in the fact that Mel also saw chopped off fingers in that lamb cake thing. I think I am going into culture shock, thanks.
Why oh why do I feel the cross "cake" is more appropriate for a funeral than the joys of Easter? It sort of looks like all it needs is a zombie hand raising up out of it.
Zombie bunny must... eat... eggsss....
Christ is crying in shame over how low the holiday has gone :(
Yeah let's eat the method of execution used to kill thousands of people including Jesus Christ next how about a guillotine
Awesome puns!! Wreckie cakes!! (Or, whatever THOSE were!)
I thought that third cake was ripped straight from the headlines: a bunnified Prince Frederic von Anhalt!
wv: aninc. They won't let me give blood; I'm too aninc.
Hoppy Edster! :D
mmmmmmmm executional device
Usagi said...
>> Poor barren bunny. I'd be sad if I couldn't have babies, too.<<
It's especially difficult for bunnies -- that whole fecundity reputation thing puts a lot of pressure on them.
Thanks for the nightmares I'm sure to have courtesy of that what-the-hell is it cake with the plastic, and the shiny icing that looks so deformed and just plain nasty!
wv: deddic, as in "I'm sorry, your rabbit was deddic on arrival at the bakery."
Isn't that cupcake thing a chihuahua? I've never heard of an Easter/Passover chihuahua before.
Am I the only one who thought the cross-cake was covered in umm... "manjuice"?
That cross is the KING'S cake. Or maybe the King of Kings' cake? Get it? Any Pentacostals out there with me? No? I guess we don't want to talk about King's cakes again.
Oh, and as a full blooded Christian, I am also laughing off my posterior.
Really, as the only cake that actually looks appetizing out of this bunch... I think I'm going to celebrate 'Edster' instead!
Does the label on that second to last one remind anyone else of "Beetlejuice"?
Personally, I hope the Edster is happy with his cake.
Number 4 must be one of those deep-fried King Cakes, doncha think?
The lamb looks like a llama!
@drumnate: full agreement. @mel: Anthony! Anthony canow tie his own shoes!!!
#1 belongs in the deli. I looked at that and immediately went to deviled ham with a potato salad border. There's something about this cake / cookie / open-face sandwich that really puts things in perspective.
#2 Edster! The Edinator! Ed-o-rama!
#3 Of course the wreckerator needs eggs, if s/he is going to scramble them to write inscriptions. Or perhaps the reference is to the lack of egg flotsam (which is frankly refreshing).
#4 Now *that* is deep fried! From a bakery in...some state where they deep fry stuff. One of the other 49, that is. Or 56.
#5 This must be a work in progress; not nearly enough flotsam yet.
#6 Now *this* is more like...the stuff of nightmares. Shiny nightmares.
#7 I can't decide if it is paved with sprinkles like the 'satellite' eggs or the batter contains sprinkles. Mmm. Crunchy.
I seriously thought at first that the second to last one was supposed to be Achmed the Dead Terrorist.
Am I am the only one who yelled " FOR NARNIA!!!" when they saw the lamb Cake? :-)
*twitch* okay, pet-peeve, but I have to make some mention of how Easter going all eggs-n-bunnies focused isn't being commercialized, it's returning to its original roots as a fertility holiday, which is was long before the Christians came around and decided just changing the meaning of the holiday and letting people still celebrate was easier than telling them to stop celebrating at all. *breath* I mean they didn't even change the name, it's still a reference to the fertility goddess Oestre, and its main symbols are obviously for a fertility holiday: baby animals, eggs, and *rabbits*.
Okay, sorry, like I said, just had to get that out. In any case, happy thank-god(s)-it's-spring holiday of your choosing ^_^
My 3 year old son was on my lap while I checked this post and kept asking, "what's that? What's that?" I can honestly said I don't know!!!!
I'm going to get the Edster cake for my father-in-law. We use that as his nickname. Of course, he doesn't know that, so the cake may come as a surprise..
#7: *blink,blink* THAT is a lot of sprinkles! I mean...just...wow..it's gotta be the highest "ssi" (sprinkles per square inch) I've ever seen!
Pretty, though...
Eek! I think I'm going to have nightmares from the lamb/sheep zombie cake.
The cross with the roses looks like a cross-shaped pan of cinnamon rolls, so the frosting is appropriate. However the roses aren't! Bleah!
Nearly pooped a pumpkin, Jen? Now that's a great trick for Halloween!
wv: gragist. I nearly gragist when I saw that creepy lamb cake!
The sad thing is that the EDSTER cake is really pretty, other than the glaring spelling issue... nice trim, lovely handwriting...
Customer wreck! :D
http://notalwaysright.com/congra-duh-lations/11237
To Anonymous at 12:09 PM:
No. It's not just you.
I was thinking that drizzled icing has far too much of a capacity to look like, shall we say, a not-very-well-piped-pearl-necklace in the same way that badly done chocolate icing looks like excrement.
Annnnnnnd it's all over a cross.
I'm an atheist and even I find that kind of icky.
(Was going to say "in poor taste" but it occurred to me that it might, in fact, be sacrilicious.)