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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Sep272010

Employee of the Year

After more than thirty years of service, professionalism, and good old-fashioned kindness, everyone at the company was sure going to miss ol' what's-his-name.


Thanks to Melani X., who loves Matt Mike Mark that guy like a brother.

« Wrecks Ahead? Here's Your "Sign" | Main | Sunday Sweets: Cartoon Cakes »

Reader Comments (38)

SO close.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBakingdom

The flotsam is NOT helping this thing.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJ. R. W.

The question mark may be in regards to the retirement rather than the name.

Like, "Please tell us the rumors of your retirent are true. You ARE leaving us, right? We don't have to put up with you here anymore, right?"

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterScott

Maybe they thought they'd make one of those cute curly exclamation points?

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Boob Nazi

why are there jelly beans and cashews in the gravel pit?

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTeacher Lady

Yak now, up until the beach fell on the road and the huge tractor in front landed there, that cake wasn't looking too awful.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWifeOfSeth

WV - handig

Retiring from driving the front loader meant Mike would have to handig that errant oasis off the road. Is he sure he really wants to retire just now?

~Becky

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Too bad, because it was a nearly cute cake otherwise. (The mystery patch with the smarties was a bit odd).

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAliza

Um ... that thing in the middle. Does it look eerily like maggots in a piece of hardtack, or is it just me?

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRebecca

I am horrible with names but I think I would of found a better way than that... sure is a LOT going on on that cake...

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercaferacers66

Perhaps Mike will enjoy his retirement playing with all the toys on top of the cake. He does get to keep those. Right?

Is the second table there to have a place to put all the flotsam so they can actually eat the cake? Perhaps putting them on a larger cake board AROUND the cake would have been a better idea.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

Why does it look like there are body parts (particularly a severed head) in that excavated area??

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterShylah

Awww, that's cute. But they might have expressed disbelief at his retirement with that "?" Either way, it's inadvertently funny.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJan

Best part of the whole cake is the STOP sign. If only the wreckerator had heeded the warning and learned to self edit before plopping two thirds of those items on the cake, or writing the inscription before calling the client and resolving the question mark issue.

I think STOP would be a great theme for a cakewrecks post. Thoughts?

~~Swan

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Guess they were afraid he'd pull a Brett Favre.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda Mac

Those pesky pterosaur nests, always popping up in the middle of desert road construction! Besides that and an extra tractor or two, it's a pretty cute cake. I hope Mike? liked it!

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAng

Don't be too hard on them... clearly the cake is under construction.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJeff

I have no ruddy idea what's going on in that scene, but I hope Mike? or whatever his name is has a happy retirement.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

Jeff gets my vote for best comment of the thread. Ha!

The lettering on the cake is actually pretty nice, but the rest of the decorations are just too much. At least they mostly go together, although I'm not sure what a dinosaur nest has to do with road construction.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelinda

I know some guys who'd love this.. and since there's a "?" after Mike... they could ALL have it!!

Seriously, though, what's with the candies in the dirt pit? Couldn't figure out how to make rocks? *snort*

Maybe I'm getting too used to Wrecks, as this doesn't seem to qualify other than for the ambiguous punctuation!

'Pull a Favre'...'clearly under construction'... *massive giggles*

~~Di

wv - uperatic -- a most uperatic scenario -- we only need to add the fat lady, or does the grade-all sing?

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

and, apparently, when "mike"? retires he's going to...do some heavy construction in florida?

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermare

So many things to figure out...

What are cashews doing on a cake, and what are they supposed to represent?

What is the 'oasis' made of (please tell me it's not real dirt) and how the wreck did the crew manage to pave -- and stripe -- *under* it? Speaking of pavement, please tell me that is also flotsam -- it looks a tad too real to be safely edible.

What does the flag represent? It's not white, so it's probably not surrender. It has some kind of symbol on it and text underneath, but zooming to the resolution limit offers no clues.

Why wasn't anyone sure who retired or if they retired? Shouldn't that be the first issue resolved when ordering a retirement cake?

Nice attempt at perspective with the different-size construction vehicles, though. At least different-scale flotsam pieces aren't randomly grouped, as they have been on other wrecks.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Mike Matt Mark! :D SO FUNNY! ;)

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStoich91

This was very funny?

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDanger Boy

What I wonder is, does Melani's last name really start with an X, or is that there as a substitute?

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJamie

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September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This is the first 'construction' cake I've seen on this site that actually looks all right. If the little traffic cones and such are edible, then even more points.

But I do wonder...is Mike a workaholic and they're just not sure he's going to retire...or has he been in the basement so long that they're not sure of his name anymore a la 'Red Stapler' guy from Office Space?

Confusion with a side of cake. It could be worse, I suppose.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterladyrazorsharp

No retirement home is complete without paved roads, front-loaders, and bulldozers for entertainment around the watering hole.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie McGee

Either they're asking how his retirement's going so far, or they're implying that he needs to show up to work more often.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

What the hell did Mike? dig up for a living? Dinosaur eggs? Arms and legs? Giant cashews?

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMrs. Q.

Makes me think of my uncle Carmon's retirement - he was County Road Supervisor (actually, the whole dept., all by himself) for something like 50 years, and all the equipment migrated to his farm/barn, because it was easier. At his retirement party, the bosses asked, "Ummm, you ARE returning all the equipment to the county garage, right?" He replied they were welcome to send guys to get the gear, but he wasn't going to hand-deliver it for 'em, 'cause the walk back would be too tiring at his age (about 72, I think). Eventually, they did collect the grader, the dozer, the trucks, the plows, the schoolbus, and the rest - took weeks!

WV: acinsh - this cake would've been ascinsh to please Uncle Carmon!

Merry at Annie's Book Stop

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Is that a giant octopus rising from the pit?

Maybe the question mark isn't so much "Will Mike retire?" as it is "Will we all be devoured by the ancient evil we accidentally unearthed?"

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

that was AWESOME! My brothers are named Matt and Mike, and my dad's name is Mark, so we mess up their names all the time! Haven't messed it up on a birthday cake though... :)

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStef

I had a good long laugh at this... because my mother (long-suffering matriarch of seven children) used to utter those very words: "Matt-Mark-Mike-oh whatever your name... clean up this mess!"

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKathryn C

The fact they added a question mark to the end makes me wonder what indeed happened to this person?

September 28, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Mike's the guy who stands on the road with his stop/go sign for the traffic...no-one's sure if he's even employed there, one day he just stopped showing up.....

September 28, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

Maybe Scott is right, and the interrogatory refers to the retirement rather than the name. Mike may have done several Brett-Favre-esque retirement fake-outs.

September 28, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Maybe he's TRYING to retire and he's finally going to? There are a lot of 'retired' guys where I work. They are retired, but they get called back in because the good engineers are all busy and the incompetent engineers are useless, so they bring in the retired folks to get the job done right. One guy is on his 4th 'retirement' I think.... Good luck to Mike!

October 15, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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