Tuesday
Mar302010
Easter? Is That You?
March 30, 2010 There's a wide range of acceptable Easter motifs these days. Lilies, eggs, baby chicks, crosses, bunny butts - there's just all kinds of stuff to choose from.
So tell me, then: What exactly is this?
An Easter...Pig?Or how about this?
Pink Cat gives you wings! Literally.Hm. I'm starting to think we should offer bakeries animal flash cards.
At least then they'd know to put "bunny" in quotes.(Check out how the right one is looking at the label. Heehee!)
Somebody please tell me this is not a cross:
Although if it's not, then the alternatives are looking pretty alarming. Yowza.Oh! Speaking of alarming religious cakes: I've yet to see a smoking lamb cake this year. I'm still holding out hope, though. And in the meantime, I did spot a few chocolate cigarettes on this "Easter flowers" design:
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but on a cake they sure alarm me.The madness continues into the cookie section:
There are no words. Only lots of snickering.And lastly, we have the gold standard of Easter designs:
The bug bunnies.- Related Wreckage: Easter Potpourri
Reader Comments (148)
I'm afraid someone beat me to this comment, but the brilliant thing about the bug bunnies is that to cut the brownines apart along the lines, you have to decapitate each and every bug bunny.
That last one is the easter bunny cemetery.
Hmmm leftover Gingerbread cookies from the freezer are great to sell 3 months after prime time!
I was thinking that maybe the cigarettes on that dubious cigarette cake were because the recipient had given up smoking for lent, and with the arrival of easter would be able to once again indulge in a little bit of cancer inducing oral combustable based activity?
Cake#1. Pig, huh? HUH!
#2. Looks kind of like a dust mite (I looked it up in a microscopic dictionary). It just needs to grow a few more legs, and lose the "caught-in-the-headlights" look, especially since dust mites have no eyes.
#3. Again... HUH!
#4. Okay, I'll tell you that "It's not a cross." But really, it is. A cross between a migraine and an acid trip.
#5. Packaged display of what was just swept up out of the gutter. (Niiice.)
Or possibly an employee *inside joke*.
#6. Oh-oh, here it comes againnnnn: HUH.
#7. This one is EASY! It's a hospital nursery! ("Oh, Mr. Bunny--come and see your 10 new daughters!")
I can see "Bug Bunnies" being the new "Carrot Jockey" ....or not.
The flower and cigarette cake made me think of Sandra Lee-- hope she's given up cake decorating, and I don't just mean for Lent!
That's not a pig, it's the little referenced Easter Care Bear!
I have to say that my favorite is the "Bunny" cakes. I laughed out loud on that one.
OMG you crack me up every time. I don't know where you continue to find these crazy cake wrecks, but your comments and captions are sublime. I take my hat off to you, and I shoot coffee out of my nose all over my keyboard in your honor... Note to self: Don't try to drink coffee while reading this blog!
msyendpr said...
Cake #2: first thought: special Hostess snowball cat created to hunt down the Peeps.
OMG this had me literally on the floor rolling. I can't even look at it now without laughing!
I LOVE holidays!!
wv: plase, as in Plase let Independence Day hurry up and get here!!
Oh thank you THANK YOU for the best laugh I've had all day. For realsies, those were some of the most atrocious things I've EVER seen! And most alarming, that lamb on the "cross", except that cross was slightly fallic. Ewww!
Easter pig? Don't tell me you've never heard of an Easter HAM!
Carrot Jockeys, the last ones look like rabbit carrot jockeys.
your blog makes me so happy! i laugh out loud every time i look at it! thank you!
that is soo funny!
Oh I can't imagine why anyone would put bunnies on the faces of gingerbread men.. scary scary bakery that is. That second cake looked like it had been electrocuted and put on a shelf. Honestly if those cakes are the best they can do I suggest they give up and go back to whatever it is they were doing before ruining cakes lol.
That pink thing ... a pink kirin? http://www.obakemono.com/obake/kirin/
who knew Chinese mythology had something to do with Easter.
I think the pink cat is trying to be a bunny. I bet it has some nasty, big, pointy teeth to match those claws...
I thought the bug bunnies looked like bunny papooses! Although commenters seeing sleeping bags makes sense, too.
The last one? Bunny sarcophagi!
I think those last ones are poo bunnies...
What would possess you to make one creepy gingerbread/carrot tie/ bunny head cookie and say "yep, that's right." and do it AGAIN?
Anonymous said...
"@Ayla. never fear. the feathers are pink. nature does not produce pink birds..."
*****
*AHEM* I beg to differ, little missy (or mister, as the case may be), but what color do you perceive FLAMINGOS to be? My vote is for "pink."
Granted, they only turn pink because of their diet (shrimps), but it's still ALL NATURAL.
msyendpr said...
Cake #2: first thought: special Hostess snowball cat created to hunt down the Peeps.
*****
Liking it! =^~.~^=
pretty sure the one you thought might be a cross is an italian colomba:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colomba_Pasquale
...covered in chocolate of course
StaceeW: orange bunny sperm! woo hoooo
what I love about this site is Jen & John are hysterical and the posts are just as good. it's a twofer!
glad I wasn't the only one who thought "good vibrations" at the "dove/cross/God-only-knows-cake"
1. I thought the Easter Pig was cute. And reasonably spring-ish. He may stay.
2. o/` Mad kitty, clawed kitty, little ball of cake... sticky kitty, freaky kitty, bake bake bake... o/`
3. @tessa: No. Pretty sure everybody noticed that.
4. I'm glad to know that shape isn't supposed to be a cross, but my first thought was "Easter dreidl!" too.
5. So much ugly about this cake, I don't even know what to say.
6. Easter declares its victory, dancing atop the fallen bodies of Christmas!
7. Everybody's so concerned about their "bodies," but what about these bunnies' FACES? They look like the kodama from Princess Mononoke! Or bowling balls. They might be bowling balls.
In summation: WOW. That is a lot of wreckage right there.
WV: natst. That swamp-green cigarette cupcake cake (CCCC???) is just natst-y. =P
I think the bug bunnies might just be inspired by the carrot jockies...
After considering Pinkcat for a day, I gotta say...yes, it is ugly, strange, and possibly an abomination.
But it's kinda cute, right?
My one-year-old made the 'quack-quack' sound when he saw it, which can only mean that he thinks it's a cat, too.
That easter pig is kinda cute. No, seriously, he is.
My daughters thought the pink monstrosity was a) a hairy bunny, or b) a monster bunny. I could buy that--with the scary face and CLAWS.
Then there was the "gingerbunny"
oh, and a pig with a cupcake.
I heard this little ditty somewhere, sometime back in my childhood:
Hippity hop. Hippity hop.
Who's that hopping through the slop?
Why is he so fat and big?
Because he is the Easter Pig!
Cake 4: no, not a cross. Was it an Italian bakery?
It looks very similar to our traditional Easter cakes: we actually call them "doves" because they (are supposed to) look like (very) stylized doves - try googling "colombe pasquali."
the Easter Pig cake has a "Lemon" sticker on it...flavor or design?
What disturbs me is that on the bug bunny cake you literally have to decapitate each one of them to get a slice. I wonder what the business end of a bug bunny tastes like?
The Pink Cat reminds us of Pepe-- the little shrimp from the Muppets. hahaha
I didn't expect to jump. That pink "bunny" is frightening beyond belief. I mean, REALLY scary. Forget clowns, needles, and confined spaces, that thing will be in my nightmares for years to come. The only responsible thing for me to do is make a wrecckplica for my son. For all three of them. Hehe. Fear is slowly being replaced with evil intent...
The cookies with bunnies and carrots look like the bunnies are masks and the carrots are REALLY BIG BEARDS. Classy.
RE: smoking lamb
For the last *year* I have been asking anyone that I think might be able to shed some light on the smoking lamb cakes.
No luck.
I haven't been to the site at all this week and was just looking through hoping that you had some update from last year.
Jen, if you ever get an explanation on them, *please* make a big daily post about it. (Not buried in comments somewhere)
I. Must. Know.
It IS bunny carrot jockeys! It IS!
The gingerbread men bunny lovers remind me of a certain Monty Python song... for adults only! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FKeQpeDkoGc
The It's Not Cross is colomba, Easter dove, one may say, an Italian thing. Vaguely pigeon-shaped. I think it should refer to the Holy Ghost but I don't know about the roots of the tradition.
The "chocolate cigarettes" look more like broken crack pipes...
The 'cross' cake is a traditional Italian Easter cake. It's meant to represent a dove... which, I suppose, makes it a fail anyways. These are probably commercially produced cakes that have been iced.
Pink Cat..imagine walking down a dark lane...and seeing this cat. Waw! lol xx
No thats not a cross but its probably a dove. Not that it makes it any better.
I agree with all the people who say the "cross" cake is probably a badly-decorated Columba cake, but I still think it looks more like a sanitary towel than anything else. Ewww.