Wednesday
Mar172010
Saint Patrick Would Be SHOCKED
March 17, 2010 
Shocked, I say!I mean, as I understand it ol' Patrick was a pretty conservative guy. So I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that the whole "Kiss me, I'm Irish" thing was not his idea.
Apparently they needed all of the capital "I"s for "IRISH." (And as we all know, the Irish hate apostrophes.)
Still, someone needs to tell these cookie cakes to stop giving us lip. Mostly because their lips are deeply, deeply disturbing:
First tell me what "Irist" means, and then we'll discuss which display of affection I'm comfortable giving you. Mmkay?Given all the suggestive suggestions being suggested, you might think Wreckerators would be more mindful of their capital "L"s, too:
Granted, that yellow magnet does "suck," but blaming it on the Irish is a pretty polarizing move.Let's end on a more positive note, though. After all, it is Saint Patrick's Day, and I'm sure he would appreciate a more appropriate expression of celebration.
Aw, that's doing Ireland proud, right there.Btw, when did Peppermint Patties
get canonized? (Not that I'm complaining, mind you; they are quite heavenly.)
get canonized? (Not that I'm complaining, mind you; they are quite heavenly.)
[brightly] Today's word, boys and girls, is "prat." Puh-rat. Prat.It has some really fun meanings, too, kids. Why don't you go look it up in the dictionary with your parents?
Terri J., Margaret C., Madeline, Chris H., Cathy W.,& Ruth S., since no one else is gonna say it, I guess I will: Happy St. Patricia's Day!
- Related Wreckage: Funny
- Related Wreckage: Funny
Update: Apparently, St. Patrick was actually Welsh. Or was it English? Ohhh... and then he was kidnapped by Irish pirates. But he later returned to England to marry Buttercup after many madcap adventures with a giant, a Spaniard and an angry little man with a lisp. Everybody clear? Good, good...
Reader Comments (128)
Hehehe... 'Pratric'. I do not think that word means what you think it means...
@kberwin:
Capital cursive "m" has two "humps," so, yeah--lower case "m" should have three. This one also needs an apostrophe, and something else...like maybe to be stepped on.
=^u.u^=
Since St. Patrick is famous for driving the snakes out of Ireland, I have only this to say…
“I’m sick and tired of these motherlovin’ cakes on this motherlovin’ plane!”
That is all.
^..^
And here I read through all the comments to make sure no one else would take the "anybody want a peanut?" reference, and there it was. Inconcievable!
I am twuly in wuv with this blog and your geeky references.
I have the Weasley boys of Harry Potter fame to thank for teaching me the word "prat" several years ago. Thanks a lot, Weasleys! ;)
If THAT didn't allow it to take off in the US, I don't know that it ever will.
Am I the only person who sees a bikini bottom instead of lips on that second cake?
Someone already saw men's shorts in the "Suck of the Irish" -- does this say something about fans of Cake Wrecks, I wonder....
Gah! Does anyone realize that St Patrick's Day is a Holy Day of Obligation in Ireland? A religious holiday, not a day of druken debauchery?
Word verification: spitia. verb ancient Irish Gaelic form of to spit; usage "I spitia on your insulting cake wreck." :o)
I'm starting to think I look forward to Holidays for the wrecks alone, and the Princess Bride reference made my day!!! Thanks!
Whoot! Princess Bride reference! Love it!
Um, but are those lips on those cakes or open wounds? Luckily I'm also Irish and therefore exempt from having to kiss them.
Happy St. Pratrick's Day!
"I do not mean to pry, but you don't by any chance happen to have six fingers on your right hand?" Love Princess Bride!
Wonderful! The Sainthood of Peppermint Pattie and her skill at baseball, and annoying Chuck, is now complete!
Isn't it fitting that a cookie for a Catholic holiday has a red cardinal on it?
"My name is Inigo Montoya. You wrecked my St. Patrick's Day cake. Prepare to die!"
Prat? I thought Spencer was one.
Today's comments have my cube-neighbors thinking I've gone off the deep end. The laughter that spills out while trying to be suppressed is sniggerific.
My faves are Vanessa and Melissa! wootness!
Mmm....St. Peppermint of Patty (or is it St. Patty of Peppermint) Either way, I think that day sounds delicious!
Those baked goods are horrible (toxic orange icing, blahh!) but your final paragraph more than makes up for it. XD
I don't know whether to laugh at the 'big whoop' cake or take a shillelagh to it. That's my heritage you're dissing, dude! =P
Actually, all of these could probably benefit from a good shillelagh-ing...
WV: cowerdin...the wreckerator of the 'Big Whoop' cake cowerdin the corner when they saw the mob coming!
I think I could only say "St. Pratrick" if I was drunk! Maybe that's the idea?
See I read "Suck of the Irish" as "Duck of the Irish" which then explained the big headless yellow duck on the cookie... sort of.
Have fun storming the castle!
wv: "suddlegr" - The Irish people reading the blog let out a suddlegr at the sight of the "Big Whoop" on the whoopie pie.
Ah Jen....Happy St. Patrick's Day!
Celebrate....
....as you wish.
That one cake is not, in fact, inviting you to kiss it on the lips. It's inviting you to kiss its disembodied stomach.
Ok, the lips on the second lip cake do not resemble the ones reserved for faces.
And I love your reference to the giant, the Spaniard, and the Sicilian! I quote that movie every chance I get.
England (Im English) didnt exsist until several hundred years after Patrick lived, the land now known as England was divided into Mercia,Wessex etc until after alfred the great in the 9th century.Ther were no English until then either. We are a mongrol people a mixture of British (now called Welsh) Saxons, Angles, Jutes, Danes, Romans as well probably and English is a composite language made up of a bit of many of the above a a few others!and Patrick was probably celibate although it wasnt compulsory in the Celtic Church.
yeah as someone from New England, despite someone already correcting you I have to back that up the Big Whoop thing is a NE thing. And I feel bad for every single person who's never had a whoopie pie, seriously. Y'all are deprived.
Oh great! Now I have Princess bride running through my head! "As you wish!" "No more rhyms, now, I mean it!" "Anybody want a peanut?" "I'm not a witch I'm your wife!" "Bye-bye boys Have fun storming the castle! Think it will work? It would take a miracle!" "Inconceivable!" "You keep using that word. I do not think it means, what you think it means" "My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father Prepare to die!" "It's not that bad . . . well, I'm not saying I'd like to build a summer home here, but the trees are actually quite lovely." And soooo many more! Love that movie!
Second one looks more like a bikini bottom than lips.... and depending on who's it is, I might want to kiss it. :P
Any Irish person actually born in Ireland would probably have a right fit over that third cake. Orange icing? Blasphemy! Orange is the color of the Protestants, and St. PaDDy's Day (note the emphasis on the D's, Wreckerator #5) is strictly a Catholic holiday as symbolized by the color green.
Princess Bride references are the BEST! Too funny!
OK, am I the only one that didn't see the "L" in "Luck" as a capital "S" but rather a lower-case "f?"
And as we all know, the Irish hate apostrophes.
Well, Irish doesn't actually have apostrophes. They're an English import. So, had the cake been in Irish, it would have been completely accurate!
Man, that "Suck of the Irish" cake is one letter f away from being more appropriate for an adult bakery.
I'm pretty sure the yellow magnet is supposed to be the space at Blarney Castle where you lay down backwards to get the gift of gab.
That's my story anyway
The Princess Bride? That's what the last part sounds like...
What's up with the uterus on cake #2?
Gem said:
"Roman. He was Roman and his name was Padraic -- thus, St. Paddy's day.
Not English, nor Welsh, nor Irish."
The Italian one was a different St. Patrick from the one who is the patron saint of Ireland. The one who converted Ireland came, as many others have said, from Great Britain.
The "lips" in the second one looks like either a bikini bottom, as a couple people have said already, or a uterus.
If you know much Irish history, you know that "May the luck of the Irish be with you" is a curse. The Irish have had enough bad luck and misery for the whole world. The Great Hunger was only one example. So "Suck of the Irish" is not a bad assessment of the overall Irish experience with luck.
Thanks to Jen and my dictionary, I now know that "prat" does not mean what I thought it meant. Your prat is what you fall on when you take a pratfall.
I think your update made me laugh even more than the post itself (which was already quite funny, by the way). Princess Bride references FTW! :)
I love Princess Bride references!
Inconcievable!
I think the "Big Whoop" cake might be a referance to Family Guy. There's a character who is Irish and short and says "Big Whoop, wanna fight about it" all the time. Atleast I hope it is
<3 Princess Bride References
Gary said: "The Italian one was a different St. Patrick from the one who is the patron saint of Ireland. The one who converted Ireland came, as many others have said, from Great Britain."
Saint Patrick was born in what is now Great Britain at the time when it was part of the Roman Empire. So yes, he was both a Briton and a Roman.
nothing says St. Patty's Day like teeny tiny pots of gold... you'll never get ye hands on mah booty!
Check out my new blog - somewhat related :D http://cupcakevigilante.blogspot.com
@Gem--
Are you saying Padraic was a _Roman_ name? That sounds kind of unlikely.
The dark age or post Roman Celts are often refered to as Romano British as they clung to the civilsation and religion of the late empire but as most 'Romans' were not Italians or even from Rome itself, Padraig (Irish or Gaelic)In "The Life", Patrick is told of coming to Wales as a bishop and vowing to serve God at Glyn Rhosyn (now St. David's). But, he was warned in a dream that the place was reserved for someone who would arrive thirty years later. He was then shown Ireland in the distance by an angel as he stood on a rock called "the seat of St. Patrick." Patrick's mission was to evangelize the distant land, a task that he carried out in a remarkably short period.
The red dragon of Wales (Y Ddraig goch) goes back a long time, long before the Union Jack was ever put together. As a national symbol for Wales, it predates its adaptation by the Tudors. The dragon is perhaps the very first mythical beast in British heraldry. Legend has Macsen Wledig and his Romano-British soldiers carrying the red dragon (Draco) to Rome on their banners in the fourth century. It was adopted in the early fifth century by the Welsh kings of Aberffraw to symbolize their authority after the Roman withdrawal. By the seventh century, it was known as the Red Dragon of Cadwallader, forever after to be associated with the people of Wales. The ninth century historian Nennius mentions the red dragon in his Historia Brittonum and it was referred to by Geoffrey of Monmouth in his Historia Regum Britanniae written between 1120 and 1129.
Cymru am byth!
oh and really ghastly wreakage!
The Big Whoop was probably made by a decorator who couldn't get off work to party because he or she was stuck making crappy holiday desserts.
Anyone else think that the lips on the "Kiss me Im IrIsh" cake look like a little red bird without feet?