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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Oct142010

Barbie's Had It Up To HERE

"And next we have a post-modern commentary on the restricting nature of societal expectations and chauvinistic stereotypes on the modern woman:

"That, or Bev got carried away with the ruffle tip again."

Good luck explaining that to the 6-year-olds, Roz W.

Note: That's a "Make Me Pretty Barbie Styling Head" on top there. Seriously. The jokes almost write themselves, don't they?

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Reader Comments (60)

Barbie's never looked better!

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDaisy

I just keep thinking that the synthetic hair must be in the frosting! BLECH! [hairball]

~Maribeth

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercklsmembers

For my 5th birthday, my mom's friend made me a Barbie cake. It looked SO much better than that. And they call themselves professionals....

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Boob Nazi

Are you making fun of amputee Barbie? I suppose she's sort of the ruffly Jabba the Hut of the Barbie cake world.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

Wow if we had to wear dresses that looked like that.. I think I would never wear dresses again...! What a travesty :{

Seriously though, could've at least made some arms with a fondant colored the same color as her skin, or some chocolate arms..

Maybe I expect too much from the wreckerators.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterManda

I think this almost belongs in the Halloween cake post...

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDanger Boy

I love it. I think someone could write an entire research paper on this cake.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

*opens mouth to speak*

*closes mouth and quietly leaves the room*

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

My 4yo daughter: "Oh, that's a pretty pony cake" "That's not a pony" "Oh, what is it?"

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKristine

Did you ever have the toilet roll covers that were basically a doll's head on a tulle 'dress'? They were popular in the UK in the '60's......that's what this looks like to me, somewhere under that frosting is a loo roll.....

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

"See - if a man and a woman love each other very much, and they are really into kinky bondage ... "

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStefan

i think i saw this on the sci-fi channel...

this is the part where the girl gets swallowed alive by the weird alien goo, right?

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkittymidori

Some of those roses are rather nicely done, but, even without the head, it's definitely overkill.
And what little girl wants a Barbie styling head with frosting in its hair? Ick.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterA Paperback Writer

Some people are never satisfied. First people complain about Barbie's body and how it it effecting our daughters' body images. So, now, they come up with a Barbie with a different body image and people still complain! I like to think of this as the new Mumu Barbie, a Barbie all girls can aspire to be.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

My teeth hurt just looking at that mountain of icing...the decapitated Barbie is on her own.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

I was laughing the moment the page loaded. Just barely managed to keep from spewing my coffee all over my computer.

OMG.

I don't know whether to laugh or gag.

WV: refeens; Wrecks like this make us hope the wreckerator refeens her technique before her next attempt.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterelissa

Naughty girl - look at the guilt on her face - she's eaten her own legs!

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think it should be a rule that if you can't tell where the cake is in a cake then you should probably stay away.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterH.J.D

Whoa! What would possess someone to use the large styling Barbie head? Yikes. Only way it could be worse if they snapped off a couple of arms from the creepy 3ft tall dolls and poked them in the side as if Barbie were jumping out.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterbooturtle

Is it the Ice Truck Killer's birthday already???

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEugenie

I remember a comedian talking about a decapitated Barbie head that you were supposed to practice your makeup skills on - I think it was referred to as "John The Baptist Barbie." Wonder if they served Salome sandwiches at that party?

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

When I first saw this, I thought it was a commentary on Samuel Beckett's play Happy Days, which features a woman trapped in a mound of earth that gradually consumes her. Do you think the decorator was somehow making a commentary on Beckett's view of existential bleakness? Naahhh ...

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLeslieG

see...the frosting dress was just so heavy she couldn't get her little arms and legs out of there. Poor Barbie. :(

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

Wow -- Wash Day Barbie! Now that has to be a collector's item.

I'll have a slice of frosting without so much synthetic hair in it.

Wreckerator #1: "We don't seem to get many orders for boy's or men's cakes here at Ruffles & Flourishes."

Wreck #2: "Yes, that is strange -- could you hand me that extra large ruffle tip? I gotta finish this cake for the Army recruitment center's grand opening."

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Oh, look, it's Bondage Barbie. Her arms have been subdued by all the ruffles.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNancy

Barbie looks like she's had one too many botox shots...... and I Agree that it looks like one of those crocheted toilet paper covers with the doll on top.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPaula

What happened to the Soviet Russia post? It's on my feed, but not the site...

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSquidley

I decorate cakes for a living and actually had a barbie cake last week...it looked nothing like that...that looks like it might be all frosting and no cake :-D

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

At least she doesn't have boobs.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPauline

I'm just earnestly concerned about all the ruffles. Why are we teaching our children to hate themselves with ruffles?!

http://arguingwithadoughnut.blogspot.com/" rel="nofollow">http://arguingwithadoughnut.blogspot.com/

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKate

My 5 year old girl going past and seeing what I was looking at:

"Oh, it's so beautiful!

I wish I would chomp down on the computer!"

So, see, it met the demands of its target audience. ; )

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBlessed

Halloween cake post...I think yes?! ;) xx

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCupcakes Lady

That reminds me of one of the worst movies I've ever seen... Boxing Helena. Only in this case it would be "Frosting Helena"

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkarina

This is going to come off as pretty lowbrow after references to Theater of the Absurd and existentialism, but I have just two words:

Captain Pike.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterfieldguidetohummingbirds

I notice several comments refer to having synthetic hair in the frosting. *Note to cakewreckers*: next time, please use real hair.
This cake looks like it was created by a drug cartel to send a message to doll makers everywhere. A decapitation cake speaks volumes.
In the '60s, doll cakes were popular where I lived, the kind where the naked doll wore a frosting bodice and a frosted cake skirt. Generic dolls were used because the real thing was too expensive, but everybody called them Barbie cakes. In fact, if you were unwise enought to point out it wasn't an authentic Barbie, the party hostess would correct you quickly (and angrily).

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMoon Rani

It's like she's stuck in quicksand that's made from layers and layers of ruffly, rose festooned frosting. Any minute now her head will slip below the surface and she'll suffer a sugary pastel colored demise..

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDance To The Door

Barbie's cake/dress reminds me of some of those 'worst bridesmaids dresses'

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterIlze

@fieldguidetohummingbirds : my sides hurt from laughing so much! Thank you!

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSuzanne

So the wreckarator completes five or six rows of ruffles --- says "Hmm Maybe I'm going overboard with the ruffles. I know I'll do a row of roses." And back to the ruffles until Barbie appears to be entombed in frosting.
Amazing.

WV: phydr. Poor Barbie must now phydr way out of that doll eating cake.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSiouxzr

Hey lets not hate on the roses and ruffles, and look, little Susie there gets a doll head to wash (frosting) and style (sprinkles) and make all purdy!
[hack..eh...hack -pulls out synthetic hair- gag]

The frosting is... DELISH!!!

WV - Scruf "They're not ruffles, they're more... scruf."

http://velcrowallpaper.blogspot.com/

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMiss Mina

I sort of sympathize with the decorator, I tried to make my daughter a barbie cake for her third birthday and it turned out terrible! She being three, thought it was the best cake ever, but it was terrible. But I don't call myself a professional, so no I don't sympathize with the decorator.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMel

@Karen: "amputee Barbie"--hahahahahaha!

I bow to the awesome posts this week.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDeirdre

Antebellum Barbie's petticoat swallowed her!

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ever try to sit down in a hoop skirt? 'Nuff sed.

wv: artiesti - that's the most artiesti Barbie cake I've ever seen.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMomcat

What kind of person would think of making a cake like that? Oh lets just throw a Barbie head on top of a cake layered with roses and ruffles!

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Cake Chick

coming this season: Diabetic Barbie

-Barbara Anne

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Wow. Ken might want to sit tonight out.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLindsay H

OMG, it's a Dalek Barbie! "Exterminate! Exterminate!"

wv: isitindu

Barbie says, "Isitindu cake while someone takes du picture of me!"

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDelibird

My 6 year old daughter saw this one and said "Oh, she's so bee-u-tiful!!! Can I have her for my next birthday cake?"

To which her twin brother pipes up "Well, she does look like you!"

Sibling love... I think it was because Barbie's blonde and DD is blonde, not that DD is covered if ruffles and roses...

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJodie

If you surgically remove Barbie's head, it is actually a pretty cake. And yes, it does look like a toilet paper roll cover.

wv: chipp
The sound made by my dental hygenist as he removes the plaque from my teeth caused by all that icing.

October 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

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