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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
May182009

Dora the "Cascajo"

(Before we bring on today's Wreckage, let us pause to pray to the literary powers-that-be that the English-to-Spanish translation site I just used isn't some frat-boy prank, and that "cascajo" doesn't actually mean something like "beaver toe." [closing eyes] Pleasepleasepleaseplease.)

As a refresher, here's what Dora the Explorer, the spunky Spanish-teaching cartoon character, usually looks like:


And here she is looking at you, kid.

Or she might be looking at the person next to you, or someone behind you...it's kind of hard to say, really.

Here she's lost a nose but gained a lovely tan:


And speaking of gaining...
Dang, it looks like Dora's been hitting the cupcakes pretty hard. (And considering she's made of cake here, is that ever ironic.)

Lastly, though, is a truly "special" Dora. A Dora that stands out in the crowd. A Dora that says, "my baker sees the world a little differently." A "manager's special" Dora, if you will:

Karin D., Jenn E., Derek C., por favor manténganse se alejado de las puertas.
(That's the extent of my Spanish, courtesy of the Walt Disney World monorail. Like it?)

« The Apostrophe is Silent | Main | Sunday Sweets: Legos! »

Reader Comments (144)

Ha ha ha ha, those are so awful! The translation site I used came up with "1.Rock fragment 2. piece of junk". Either way.....

Our family loves your blog!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Dora the Exploder!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDavid B

Erm. What translation site did you use, exactly? "Cascajo" means "gravel" or "rubble". Did you mean rubbish, perhaps? xD

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTaylor J

Sweet mother of cakes! My niece had a Dora cake and her Gamma did a good job, at least she wasn't cross eyed or overweight! God I love this site!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBobbi

One teeny correction to the Spanish...you don't need the extra "se" after "mantengase". It's just kind of chilling there without meaning anything :)

Great post!!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

HI-freakin-LARIOUS!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBellaLovesPink

I love the monorail part! You saved me from trying to remember what it says. My children laugh at me when I por favor blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah at them!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSara

The EXTRADora is cracking me up.

Isn't that really the weight problem right at the core: That your physical self is made up of entirely too much cake?!

It boggles the mind. Now hit the treadmill, Dora.

www.captainjackmakesport.blogspot.com

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEl Comodoro

That last one looks like the main character from My Life as a Teenage Robot lmao

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLan

Okay, the first one was not that bad honestly. She's a little cross-eyed, but I have a slight problem like that in real life.

The others though "shudder." are you SURE the last one is Dora?

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

yeah i looked up cascajo and everything i found said it meant rubble or pebble. if you want to say explorer it should be explorador or exploradora in dora's case....omg is that why she's named dora?! i've always wondered that. because seriously dora the explorer does not rhyme. but dora the exploradora...well it ain't great but it makes way more sense!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLan

My 4 year old daughter, who normally doesn't notice things like weight, started laughing when she saw "large" Dora and told me "Dora ate too much!"

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMomOf2Kiddos

As we say in the south - That's special - in a short bus kinda way - Bless her heart!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTracy O

Ah! The East Coast version of Disney Spanish comes from the monorail! Here on the West Coast those of us learned our Spanish from Disneyland's Matterhorn: "Remain seated please; Permanecer sentados por favor."

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMonica

How did you even know that the last one was Dora-too funny!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered Commenternlaug

Yes, "cascajo" works brillantly for what you were looking for. True, it also means junk, but it's all about usage. Dictionaries are great, but they can't tell you everything!

Deleting the extra "se", it would be-
"por favor manténganse alejado de las puertas"

¡Me encantan estos cascajos de Dora!

(from a native speaker with a master's in spanish! I'll go back to being a teacher on vacation now!)

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

omg I have to buy that monorail t-shirt when I go to disney this year... is it in a special store or will it be in all of them??

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBrittany

HAHA I recognized the monorail line immediately. PLEASE STAND CLEAR OF THE DOORS...

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJulianne

that first one (the cross-eyed Dora) is my fav. Hilarious! At least she resembles Dora, even if it looks like she's dizzy with vertigo or whatever. The rest...hmm.

Actually the fat Dora is pretty awesome too. :) (Dora es gorda._

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDangGina

The first one wasn't so bad, except she looked more Asian than South American and, well...the eyes, obviously...but overall, the craftsmanship could have been much much worse. .
I just loved the 'supersize' Dora, though. And the creepy 'ghost-Dora' was a bit on the wrongly awesome side.

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterstr4y

Oh god, I have a sinking feeling rock fragments are the new Epcot.

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBrianna T

The crazy eyes on the Manager's Special Dora have actually hypnotized me. Off to remove all my clothing and bawk like a chicken....

"Dora" and "Explorer" rhyme perfectly for most English speakers on the planet. Not, however, for most Americans, and Dora is an American show, so I'm still confused. (However, Brian Regan notes that it rhymes inside the Kennedy household...)

Cascajo

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMarcos

Good Golly Dora!

Aside from the ummm unfortunate...eye situation...in number one and the slightly too pale Dora, it's the best of the lot. Now, the others are hot messes.

WV: leure -- like lurid, only more sophisticated.

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPassion Fruit

cascajo?

im mexican and dont know what that means

heh

:)

wreck = desastre

oh oh

i start my morning everyday with cakewrecks

you rock

:D

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterhippix

GREAT post, and I especially LOL'd at the end with the Disney World monorail reference...fond childhood memory!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJen

Not cake related, but I've just realized why Dora is a brunette with a suntan: here in France, Dora teatches... english!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMiss Souris

ha ha ha ha *snort*

Was the chubby Dora produced from a mold? Is there a Chubby Girl Cake genre out there? The mind reels.

And the last, I think, was Dora of the Dead.

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMama Jamz

¡Cascajos a-DORA-bles!

Thanks for the laughs!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRachel T.

With a graduate degree in Spanish Translation, I'm going to tell you, Jen, don't sweat the "rubble". You used a correct translation for coloquial usage and as Mar says, it's an idiomatic expression. People from every corner of the Spanish - speaking world will have a different word for "wreck" it's a question of localization.

Best example of localization in English would be the difference between "flat" and "appartment" or "lift" vs. "elevator". Neither is wrong, it depends on who's speaking and who's listening.

*shrug* Meh. Dora is pretty terrifying in those wrecks no matter what.

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Lili Effect

Considering Dora is a LICENSED character, selling cakes made to look like her (as dubious as some of those, um, representations are), is highly ILLEGAL. The ONLY legal Dora cakes are the kit cakes (can we say air brush and plastic figurines). Those character-shaped pans that Wilton sells state right on the package "for home use only". Bakers who make and sell cakes using those pans are breaking the law. I personally wouldn't want to pay the money companies such as Nickelodeon and Disney sue for. And YES, they will sue even the sweet little old lady down the street who sells her cakes if she infringes on their copyright. I'm just sayin'.....

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That was a fantastic job on cake decorating. As a little league baseball fan and coach, I know important it is to provide good detail and tasty treats for the little ones.
Great job and fun article.

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBaseball Pins

When I first looked at the last cake, I thought Dora had a mustache! Now that is disturbing! ;)

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSasha

Funny, as always!

Good use of cascajo, too.

Estar hecho un cascajo....to be a wreck

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Am I the only one who thinks that the last Dora cake could be related to Chiana from Farscape? I mean she could SO pass for a Nebari with that hair and skin tone. LOL

As for the other cakes.....just wow. That one Dora looks like she could be a mountain.

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterApril

haha looks like she has a lazy eye.

raychel from mycreativeway.blogspot.com

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRaychel

That last one looks like an anime Dora.

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hahaha I actually saw a "Dora" cake this morning, but at first glance I thought it was Jabba the Hut!

Meow!
http://kitty-cakes.blogspot.com/

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterROYALTY

OH MY GOD. Long time reader, but I've never commented before today ... but I MUST SAY that I almost died when I read "please stand clear of the doors" FOR THAT IS ALSO THE EXTENT OF MY SPANISH! Oh, the glorious Walt Disney World monorail! (Oh, and I totally knew what Spaceship Earth was, too.)

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKatherine

Oh, no the fat one isn't Dora. It is her older sister Consuela who has a "gland problem" that no one is allowed to talk about. Poor Consuela.

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterelesa

I think the last one is the ghost of Dora past.

There's a little something for you over at my blog!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

:)) {HA HA}

that is all.

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHeidi 'n' Jeff

Cascajo? Hahaha!Are you being clever? X333

Pastel or torta is cake, but if you say 'estar hecho un cascajo' the meaning is 'to be a wreck'. XD

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKristen

That cock-eyed dora will ALWAYS be the way I see her now...

TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO funny!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChica

hahahah, before I studied Spanish at night school the Disney World monorail was my only phrase too!

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJenny

Please stand clear of the doors!

Or the best..."All clear" *beep beep* (my mom and I still say that from time to time).

Woot! I can't wait to go back to Disney.

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterpeaches1111_00

That last Dora looks more like a clean-shaven Pogeybait....http://www.presspop.com/en/shop/daniel_clowes/pogeybait_doll.html

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWinterlaurel

I was looking at this post while laughing, when my three year old looks over my shoulder and says "I want that one for my birthday!!!" Kids are such forgiving critics.

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJill

wow I work in a Supermarket bakery and these never cease to amaze me. I like to think our cakes are good.

And being the total Disney geek and castmember that I am...I have the whole monorail speil on my IPOD "Welcome aboard the Walt Disney World Monorail, your highway in the sky to the Magic Kingdom..."

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRian

I LOVE the WDW monorail spanish! I can recite that, too. It puts us into that club of people who spent too much of their vacation on the monorail. Did you know it's the fastest ride at Disney?

May 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

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