Wednesday
Apr222009
Well, Cake IS My Drug of Choice...
April 22, 2009 
Before I address this cake, I would like to state a few things for the record:
1) My mother reads this blog. (Hi, Mom!)
2) I have never, ever, even remotely considered the possibility of so much as looking at a piece of drug paraphernalia. Ever. (Hi, Mom!)
So my question is this, Stephanie A.: Does a crack pipe really look like a coffee cup filled with bloody mini-marshmallows? 'Cuz I always pictured something a little edgier, like that thing the caterpillar is smoking in Alice in Wonderland*.
*Yes, Disney movies are my only base of reference for drugs. Heck, it was years before I figured out smoking doesn't turn people into donkeys. (Although when the "no smoking" sign is present, it does turn them into jackasses. Booyah! Up high! Haha!)
Reader Comments (133)
maybe thats supposed to be fire on the top?! Where do people come up with these ideas?! LOL
My thought process in response to this cake was very similar to yours. It's, er, interesting ... but I have no basis from which to say whether it's an accurate depiction.
My only comment is those look like bloody sperm in a pot of marshmallows cooking to make some seriously freakish rice krisy treats. Thank goodness they wrote crack head-I would have been really confused, heck I think I still am...
I'd say the red looks less like blood and more like "swimmers."
And the thing The Caterpillar smokes is called a hookah.
Why????????
Love the smoking "crack." Yes, I realize that the pun is the lowest form or humor.
When I first saw the photo, I thought that it was a measuring cup, with crushed Starlight mints in it. Until I read the note.
Funny, in a strange, twisted kind of way.
Ewww... it looks like an army of red semen attacking a field of cotton balls.
My question is just... WHY?
Why would you do this?
If you think puns are the lowest form of humor, you haven't watched Mind of Mencia.
As for the cake...it looks like it's filled with freshly-pulled teeth.
Hmmm now I do want to know what a crack pipe looks like. (Hi Mom!)
What a cute, fluffy crack pipe! If Disney did do a ghetto princess movie, I'll bet this is what they'd look like.
As the other posters pointed out it looks like bloody...umm...something. I'd see a doctor if I were them.
And Jen, don't feel too bad. I think they showed us a crack pipe in elementary school as part of the infamous DARE program, and I don't really recall it looking like this.
I DID, however, find a bong stuffed in the cushions of a couch that my roomie and I bought at Good Will during grad school. She turned it into a flower vase. o_O
....And the hookah is for tabacco not crack.
Here are some pictures of actual crack pipes...looks nothing like that though? odd....and hilarious :)
IF you can call that red stuff fire (which is a stretch IMHO), then this actually looks a little like my bunsen burner in the lab. Can't really say that's a good thing, though.
Tracy O
I thought coffee mug too.
And like you, Disney movies are about my only exposure to drug references.
Ahhh, innocence is bliss!
Here are some pictures of actual crack pipes...looks nothing like that cake, but that makes it MORE hilarious!! :)
http://photobucket.com/images/crack%20pipe/
It's not accurate in the least. Though people will smoke crack out of most anything, the usual crack pipe doesn't look like a white corncob pipe like this cake. They are often just glass rods.
Also, I am fairly sure that IS supposed to be fire but too is inaccurate. Crack doesn't really look anything like that when it burns.
Obviously the cake decorator has never seen a crack pipe either, or just chose to make a really silly and unoffensive version.
P.S. I don't smoke crack. Or anything else.
I don't get why it looks like a bunch of eggs being fertilized by little red spermies. I've seen Meet the Parents, I've seen Judd Apatow movies - they don't look quite like this.
Can you imagine how embarrassing the recipient must have been? Well, unless she actually was high on crack. Oh my.
I was hoping for some Earthy Cakes for Earth Day :(
That is probably one of the craziest cakes yet. I'm with milk and cookeez!
Cheers
Coffee cup filled with bloody mini-marshmallows. Perfect, perfect description, because I was staring at this and trying like hell to make the "crackhead" connection.
I am so glad I'm not the only one who thought the red blobs looked like sperm. It makes me feel like I have company in my lonely little gutter.
One of the reasons I fell in love with my husband was that the Caterpillar was / is his favorite Disney character. He keeps a miniature one next to our very real (and used by someone!) Hookah.
Pleased to know the decorator didn't know what a crack pipe looks like either.
Maybe the parents of the hitler kid ordered this for their birthday.
Not that I've ever seen a crackpipe (short of watching COPS and the like on tv) but I'm with everyone else..looks like bloody semen attacking some marshmallow-like eggs in a weird pot.
Heh..I said "pot".
Despite Addie's interest in extra-curriculars, I feel sad for her that she is not being honored for being someones "favorite anything else". Perhaps she plays the mandolin, tells a joke well, or maybe something simple like having a nice smile.
I'm happy to say I have no idea if that's a realistic depiction or not. Looks like they've gone camping and are making a big ol' batch of marshmallows for the s'mores. And maybe somebody cut their hand....and...oh I don't know. Odd the lives some people lead.....
At first I thought this was supposed to represent a frying pan with brains being cooked in them...
You know, from the "This is your brain on drugs" PSA's from way back when
I used to work as a Public Defender in a big city, and that definitely doesn't look like any crack pipe I've ever seen. Unless they've changed drastically in the past 10 years since I switched my line of work...
Because the wreckorator thought using tin foil wouldn't be classy enough.
And now for the rest of the day I'll be singing to myself
"Are you going to strawberry sperm?
Parsley Sage, Rosemary and Thyme..."
Great.
Are crack heads really intrested in cake?
When I saw the title I thought you had come across this little gem: http://tinyurl.com/cxdygk" REL="nofollow">Brass Eye - Cake(Note: some swearing)
More information http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brass_Eye" REL="nofollow">Brass Eye on Wikipedia.
Me, I'm high on Cake Wrecks.
I am willing to put out there that I do not know what a crack pipe looks like, but I have seen (not used; hello, mum!) a hookah (Alice in Wonderland) and I have seen, handled, and used a bong for the green leafy stuff (waaaaay back when; yeah, mum, I learned my lesson). I also used a brass pipe for said green leafy stuff. This was back in the 80's (mum, you know I am a good girl now -). That "cake" . . . uff da! Looks like a cake maker is reaching . . . and failing
I thought hookahs were for smoking opium...
Anyway, as a school librarian (middle school health class drug report projects are common) I can fairly certainly say that is NOT what a crack pipe or cooker looks like.
But, to each his own. Maybe this is the 'nightmare' version?
Nothing says "delicious" like a simmering pot of marshmallows and blood. MMMMMM.
Your commentary is so hysterical, I can't add anything. Plus, my drug knowledge is even less than yours.
A crack pipe cake...when do we get to see the bong?
Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
Oh, I feel a Lewis Carroll lecture coming on. I'll try to restrain myself, since this isn't actually an Alice cake. (Ooh, Jen, do you have any of those? I bet the Cheshire Cat can be very wrecky.)
But yes, as others have said, the Caterpillar is smoking a hookah.
The original Sir John Tenniel Caterpillar:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caterpillar_(Alice%27s_Adventures_in_Wonderland)
Why does everyone think of Disney's Alice? Pah.
They must have thought a crack pipe was like a corn-cob pipe. I wonder what that filling is? Apart from crack, that is. . .
I did something like this for my brother's 15th birthday once as a hilarious joke. No one thought it was funny.
crack pipes are most often a straight, hollow tube with a stretched Brillo pad pulled through (as a filter). that would be a boring cake. they SHOULD have made like, an ice cream scoop with white gel looking substance. that's more what crack looks like.
NOW YOU KNOW!
@Elyse - there's worse things they could think of than the Disney Alice. They could think of Lewis Carroll's...umm..questionable tastes in...well heck, the fact that he fancied little boys.
I'd say making the Disney connection is the better of the two!
Earth Day Cakes please!!!
Not that bloody sperm chowing down marshmallows isn't entertaining, but today is a very important day.
We need some tree cakes with Keebler elves, or a little planet Earth as a marble from MIB, or .. . ... something!
Go Green!!
VW: enslop. "The sperm we enslopped with the marshmallows for observation."
That may actually be the cooking spoon more than the pipe, too.
hahahaha! that made my day! my name is addie... but i promise i'm NOT a crackhead :o)
If you leave of the red, you'd get what it looks like when I try to warm milk on the stove... I always overflow it! I thought that's what it was. I'm SOOO glad you told me it was drugs! Crack kills...in this case, it killed the cake!
I was thinking popcorn upon first sight.
I'm always asking people if they are on crack when they say or do something crazy. Maybe I should ask one of them if this is what a crack pipe looks like.
Ummm, does anyone else find it alarming that they can reference DISNEY for their drug information?? LMAO.