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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Sep302008

Going to the Dogs, Continued

As promised, today's parade of cakey canines features the icing-drowned cupcake pups, which in my opinion ride dangerously close to the whole cupcake-cake-concept, and are therefore worthy of all the condemnation we can heap on them. But, I digress.

First up, a creation that looks more like a doggy end-product than a dog:


That's the side view. If you're thinking it will be more recognizable from the front...


Think again. Oh, and don't you love all the effort put into decorating the cake board? Somebody's shootin' for the stars.

This one's not bad, other than the fact that it's neon pink, worried-looking, and apparently vomiting sprinkles. Huh. Come to think of it, that last bit might explain the first two issues (although then neon green would be more appropriate).

Here's my favorite: the pooch's face has slid completely off his head and onto the board! I'm guessing the decorator added those paw prints after a few customers asked why the store was selling misshapen icing ploops on a board. (Yes, "ploops". I find it to be an apt description.)

Now there's a face only a mother could love. (And only a decorator could recognize, for that matter. Seriously, would you know this thing was supposed to be a dog?)

Thanks to Wreck-Wranglers Megan S., P.R., and Kristin!

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Reader Comments (114)

...I can barely tell that they're dogs after you say so.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMaque

Glarrrggg....those neon cakes actually made my bowels gurgle.

Oh, and I think puppy paw prints have four "fingers".

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterThe Courteous Chihuahua

Not the thing I should be looking at this early in the a.m., ha! At first I thought the decorator did a mighty fine job of smoothing out the icing on the cake, until I realized what I thought was the cake was actually just a plain cake board (those scallops will fool me into thinking it is a cupcake cake every time).

Were these ordered, or were they created on spec, and on the bakery shelf waiting for someone to adopt them?

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterPrinceton McKinney

'Ploops', indeed. Add that term to the Cake Wreck dictionary. These are just plain gross.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSleepwalker

See, this is what people get for obsessing over those overly precious miniature breeds. If you can actually see the legs on your dog, maybe you'd be less inclined to try to make a cake out of it. And would thereby avoid the risk of trying to reproduce long fur in edible form.

By the way, are there any wrecky kitty cakes out there?

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterFlartus

I suspect the pink one is supposed to be Clifford, the Big Red Dog.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJamie

When my boys were little, we had a dog named, "spicy" and whenever the food was declared spicy, they'd run check to see if we still had a dog. I cannot imagine eating a cake dog, either.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterjoyce

OK, that is like my 3-year-old niece's dream come true: a cupcake so slathered in frosting you can't even tell it's a cupcake. gross.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKati

I just found your blog and I love it. It's the perfect start to my day. :-)

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKris

I love the one that's vomiting sprinkles. Hilarious.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That last one looks like it was decorated with a can of Cheez Whiz. Eww!

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAng

I think I'm more in shock over how many people actually WANT a cake like this...I guess dogs are really popular !

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJames ~n~ Amber

Wait... which one is a cupcake?

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMorgan

Why is the red one vomiting confetti?? Or is that the wrong end... *sigh*

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

Yeah, these's are pretty bad. though the neon pink one isn't bad, except for the things you list. So maybe that person has some talent but no taste?

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

Cracks me up!!!
I particularly like the vomitting sprinkles part....lol

So walmart sells these little cakes and I did purchase one for my mother in law, she is a dog lover all the way to the extreme... however ours was so cute we could not eat it, she just showed it off and then let it sit until it was petrified.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterStacey

I can't even imagine what the party would be like after the kids ate all that frosting. Talk about being jacked up on sugar!

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenteraMuse

the only good thing about those (and by "those" I mean the chocolate icing one) is that if you really liked icing waaayyyyyyy more than cake, that's the cake for you!

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAmber

Well, minus the sparkles, I actually really like the pink dog. The big brown lump and the yellow ploop of frosting make me twitch, though

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdimloep-suum

Bleh. Can you imagine eating all that frosting? I'll say it again: Bleh.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterEthan, Zach, and Emma's Mom

These are cupcakes? Not that it matters. They are uglier than sin.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hilarious! I personnally hate the dog cakes because they have taken over the spot where the single slice of cake were. Confessions of a sneaky eater...I would get a single slice when I had a craving They were great because all evidence would be gone by the time I got home! I am the only one who likes white cake, everyone else is a chocolate fan, so I'd have to sneak cake to get the kind I wanted.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterThistledew Farm

I love this post about cupcake pups because my kids call cupcakes "pupcakes".

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

These are cupcake cakes? Why did they bother with the cake at all? Why not just sculpt some frosting and call it a day? (I love frosting, but this might be beyond my tolerance...)

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterbeth

That second puppy is the color of pepto bismol, which apparently he either desperately needs or has overdosed on. Either way the situation is bad!!!

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

Thanks for the laughs. Those are horrible!

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSarah Rosales

Seriously now, I think my dog has left something like that first one on my carpet before...GROSS!

The 2nd one looks like clifford ate the party favors.

And the 3rd one is just plain sad. I really want to scoop up the face and put it back on his body.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdebbiearnn

Yuck! Just imagine trying to eat this. Disgusting....no more puppy cakes, please! :)

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterslf

The last one? OMG! it is so funny [well they all are] but the way the face just.....slid.

The first two appear to be photographed at the bakery, so those don't look as tho' purchased, but the last one?

Who would buy, serve & consume?

It boggles

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSkippyMom

Uh...are we sure there actually *is* cake under there somewhere? These all appear to just be giant blobs of frosting. Ick. I may vomit up some sprinkles myself.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRose

Awwwww. I have feelings for the yellow one. It just needs some lovin' and it'll be as good as the other wrecks some day. Poor little guy.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenternancy b

I agree- the red one is supposed to be Clifford. And I think he is vacuuming up the sprinkles.

Clifford the Big Red Hoover.

(Oh, and congratulations on the book deal, Jen! Hope you might also consider the calendar too.)

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

nny i thought the first was a turd, and the last I flet needed a caption in the board... sorry I ran over your critters face~ so sad yet so funny!

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLaura ~Peach~

I've always wondered if people actually eat these monstrosities -- it makes my pancreas ache just looking at them!

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Wow. So is there actually CAKE under all that icing?

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterApril

Just when you think it might be safe to visit Cake Wrecks with a hot cut of java in your hand...I should know better by now.

That bottom 'dog' looks like acid trips people have described to me. Only worse, because it isn't an hallucination.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTwistie

AaaahhHaHaHa!

Double-yew
Tea
Eff

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJ Rob

"This one's not bad, other than the fact that it's neon pink, worried-looking, and apparently vomiting sprinkles."

You never fail to make me laugh audibility with each new wreck. I do not remember exactly how I stumbled upon this blog but I am glad I did. Your humor brightens my day. Thank you.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdnlandes

And why, oh WHY, is the brown dog so SHINY..... ploop ploop ploop!

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commentercannongirl

Belive it or not this is all I have to say....

O.kaaaaaaa!

Peace,
Clueuin

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterclueuin

Oh dear, the footprints around the little yellow mush-puppy look like poo :(

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterOphelia

*shudders*

The pink one was scary.

I'm not getting any sleep tonight.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterShadow Shaivya

It just gets better and better!

The second shot of the brown terrier does look like an end-product (with a few raisins, or black beads, that may have been swallowed).

The neon orange doggie makes me think of "The Scream" - you know, the Munch painting.

Kat

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterPoetikat

I think the neon pink/red one is clifford the big red dog. Can't explain why he is vomitting sprinkles, though!

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAlli

The "worried" look on the pink dog's face cracks me up!

Thanks for my my day brighter--I love your blog!

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

This one really made me laugh! Sprinkles have totally made me throw up before! HAHAHAHAHA!!!

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenter'Cuz I Felt Like It!

...is the first one dog poo?

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRandom Ambulance

The hot pink dog reminded me... my neice and nephew are twins... they turned 2 on Sept. 19th. Their party was "Clifford" themed... they got them each a RED dog, 2 cupcake cake, to "eat"... as cute as it is to see them eat it and have icing from head to toe... RED wasn't the best choice... it dyes your skin... and your blonde hair... LOL

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I didn't even read any description for the first "dog," I just saw the picture and said, "Oh, no, that looks like poop." Nuff said.

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterWild Child

The last one looks like his face was run over by a car

September 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSarah+2girls

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