Wrecks on Display
September 2, 2008 Usually the goods in a shop window are supposed to be, well, good. But with advertising like this, who needs competition?
Between the faded-out colors and crumbled who-knows-what littering her face, Tyra has seen better days.
I can see why the construction crew was called in: this cake-tastrophe not only split the earth asunder, it also rained cigarette ash from the sky. Nice blue border though. Er, why is that there again?
Nah, these aren't Wrecks. They're actually kind of cool, in a bizarre way - so I thought I'd share. The green prickly one in particular fascinates me.
Bummer.
What in the Sam hill is going on here?!? Is that supposed to be Barbie's skirt? Because it looks like some massive icing eruption, with her shooting out of the top like a human cannon ball.
And speaking of eruptions and cannon balls, I hope I don't get in too much trouble for posting these next, honorary "cake" Wrecks:
Really, these have got to be the least phallic looking phalli I've ever seen - so if your kids ask, they're little rocket ships, mkay? Just ignore that little sign. Check out the sweet display setup, too: that yellow plastic bucket is totally selling 'em. And what do you suppose that crumbly bread-ish looking thing is next to it? Wait, scratch that; I don't want to know.
Thanks to eagle-eyed Wreckporters Mark T., Monique R., MR, Rachel D., and Xanna C.
Reader Comments (158)
It's funny that you should mention cigarette ash right after Tyra cause she had a show on recently about a girl that ate cirgarette ashes! Not that I watch that crap, I saw it on The Soup. :)
Funny as, as usual!!
What's with the Willy on the right back corner, someone used their teeth!!
Ouch... pmsl
Um...you're supposed to eat penises in honor of gay pride?
Nooo....that's...noooooo
I am not gay, but I can't imagine I would find that appropriate if I were.
My first thought on the Barbie cake was the standard bachelor party present of a stripper in a cake. Not really age appropriate. :)
Hilarious! The Barbie one looks like she's jumping out of the cake. Poor Barbie, she's only stripping to put herself through med school.
Seriously, that Barbie cake looks like a train wreck. And those gay pride peni? Really? Couldn't they at least taken pride in the product they produce?
Hallie :)
lol, I thought they were some kind of mushroom cookie/cupcake!
No lie, I had a cake like that Barbie one, only my mom used a brunette Barbie knock-off instead (in her defense, I'm a brunette too and it was my 6th birthday) - it was pink, and the cake WAS the skirt. Pretty lady took a header about 3 slices into it.
lol I was thinking is it remotely possible that the broken construction cake was broken ON PURPOSE??? but then the poor running cake and the phallic mini cakes? Oh my how funny!
Wow, that Barbie cake is just... I don't know. You were FAR kinder with that cake than *I* would have been in my description of it.
And the gay pride cookies? Jeeez, what were they thinking on those? Could they be any more stereotypical. *sigh*
lawl. too funny. I shot a wedding on Saturday and the grooms cake said.. "Congratulations "Grooms Name"" Hahahaha. I was like.. inappropriate quotation marks! I thought of Cake Wrecks immediately. I would send it in but you know.. being a client and all, I decided against it. :) So just imagine it for me. :P
its barbie jumping out of a cake for ken!
haha! im SO gonna ask the bakery down the street to make that for a friends bachelor party next month!
Not even going to comment on the pink and yellow willies, LOL! I think I would have cried after making all those icing roses just to have them melt, but certainly wouldn't have displayed it to the whole world >.> And why is it always green? I mean, the rest of the cakes in that display ate beautiful, but the green ones? Who wants to eat cake the color of mold?
Because when I think of gay pride, I think of pastries shaped like wangs!!!
Niiiiice.
That pink monstrosity 'Bummer' cake?... Well that there is very definition of a 'Cake Wreck'
:-)
Perhaps the FE on the Barbie cake sign stands for Frosting Eruption. $60??????
That looks like a dead cat next to the, um, chocolate-covered reflex hammers.rmxxyy
That last one is so wrong. So. Wrong.
LMAO!
If you had not told, I would have sworn those last ones were some kind of weird mushrooms.
If that's Barbie's dress, her legs must be about seven feet long. SCARY!
Man, just when you thought it couldn't get any worse.... what a shame these people call themselves cake decorators!
Wait - that last one could be used as a personality quiz. When I look at it, I only see mushrooms.
That Barbie cake looks like one of those toilet paper roll covers. Appetizing!
LOL, before I read the caption I though the phallic ones were mushrooms!!
The Barbie one isn't a cake - it's a toilet roll cover. Isn't it? Really? You sure about that? Oh.
is that three-tier red one supposed to be erupting, or is it vomiting?
Regarding the bummer cake -- I immediately began hearing MacArthur Park playing in the background:
"Someone left the cake out in the rain..."
I love the Barbie cake...it looks like a stripper jumping out of a giant cake...probably more for a bachelor party than a little girl's birthday.
That blue thing around the construction site must be like the fencing they have up in real life - it does need to be higher though, with some peepholes in it.
The prickly green cake might be a cactus - this is the least disturbing idea that came to me.
I adore this site, you are brilliant!
Apart from the blue border, I quite like the digging cake. xD
-Kazen
Any particular reason why one would want Tyra Banks on a cake? Anyone?
"Mommy, what are those?"
"Um, they're, uh, rocket ships! Yeah!"
Oy vey. LOL
P.S. You can post whatever you like--it's your blog!
Nice set. As for the last photo... 1) perhaps they're meant to be Segways, 2) If not, is THAT the end they should've dipped in chocolate?
(... sorry, couldn't resist! XD)
I honestly thought those last ones were small children's hammers... continuing the construction theme from above. And what's with the "chocolate dipped" look?
Thanks for sharing!
The question is, why are some of those still on display? I mean the point of displays is to lure people into the store so they buy things, if I saw a cracked cake in the window, I'd just walk on by. Your best is supposed to be in those displays.
On the non-wreck picture, I love the white edged roses, on the purple cake top center. Those look fantastic.
I've seen those Barbie cakes before. In fact, I coveted one when I was...ooohhh, about eight. Then again, I never saw one that made me think she was sinking in frosted quicksand before.
Yes, you see shot from a rocket, but I see her going down waiting futilly for Ken to work out how to save her.
I'm morbid that way.
And I guess only men can take pride in their gayness. Where were the little chocolate-dipped vaginas on their separate tin cookie sheet? Would they have gotten their own bucket? Would it have been purple?
Then again, looking at what they did for the boys, I suppose it's a mercy they didn't get all equal opportunity on us.
The Barbie one looks like she is popping out of the cake like a stripper. Scary. I've seen some Barbie cakes where the cake is actually her skirt, and it is very cute. This one, not so much.
I seriously thought the willies were mushrooms, and you were going to comment on them having a resemblance to willies. But, um, well... no.
A Death to Smoochy reference? Very nice, I thought I was the only one who ever saw it :)
Barbie looks like one of those strippers that pops out of a huge cake at a bachelor party.
ewwww. all of these cakes are so gross. Makes me feel nauseous. Thank goodness today is the first day of Ramadan.
I had that Barbie cake for my 5th birthday in 1984. Glad to see it made it beyond my little town. To a 5 year old girl it's the best thing. It's massive dress of cake & frosting then when the cake is gone you have a new doll to dress. very sweet.
That Barbie cake looks a little too much like a creepy looking candle to me. And not at all appetizing.
That must be Stripper Barbie jumping out of a cake at a bachelor party!
Hilarious! Are those gay pride, um things, eclairs?
I just found your blog and have been loving it- it's so great to have a good laugh.
I've been referring everyone I know and put you on my blog roll.
Classic, funny stuff! Love it!
beautiful blog you have jen, nice blend pictures nice themes..
wish you success...
warmst regards from the east...
I'm going for the mushrooms rationale on that last picture.
Mom: "Look honey! Mushroom cookies!"
Kid: "Eeeewww! I hate mushrooms! Can we go to McDonalds?"
60 bucks for a Barbie cake?! Sheesh!
First time visiting your blog, and I love it. Too funny!
Marianne
On that last picture, I don't know what's funnier your comments, their misuse of the 's or that they called them willies. LOL!
Barbie... Looks like a stripper jumping out of the cake.