Fire!
November 7, 2008 Believe it or not, this cake is supposed to look like this:
Well, sort of, anyway.
That deer is staring straight into my soul, and it's totally creeping me out. The smoke column on the side is kind of odd, too, although I like the idea of using sprinkles for ash.
And what could be better than a cake with a demonic deer staring out from the fiery depths? How about one that was sold in California when all the wild fires were raging? Yep. Niiice.
Or, to Wreck it up further, you could always have a dial-a-wreck inscription on it:
That's supposed to say, "Happy Birthday you old bastard". So obviously the wonky heart was the decorator's idea. "Let's see, demonic deer, unintelligible greeting, hmm...it still needs something...."
Oh, wait, that smoke column was supposed to be a tree? Huh. Well, I guess if all the leaves were burned off...
Jenna Z. and Rya M., these cakes are smokin'.
Reader Comments (162)
I've decided to start taking my camera to the grocery store. I've already missed one or two great Wreck opportunities.
Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
Pastard? Really??
Okay, here's what I'm wondering: On cake #1, is that a plastic deer, or one made out of fondant/gumpaste? I think it must be the former, becuase it looks VERY good, and wouldn't mesh with the quality on the rest of the cake.
Cake #2. *shakes head*
You know, there's something about the haphazard way the second cake's letting is applied that just underscores the message...
RUN, BAMBI, RUN!
if it were a goat i would have it mounted on my wall !
The grass is much better done in the second cake- it really does look like fire in the second one. Without the inscription the second one would actually be nice, well, assuming you wanted a deer cake.
I sent this in too! Couldn't believe it when I saw it! Made me flashback to poor Bambi...
"Pastard"?
oh my.
The first one does look like a prairie fire. Which is cooking an oddly complacent deer.
The second one represents the trees and field better, but the writing looks like it was done by someone's two-year-old.
I bet if I applied for a cake decorating job I would be turned down cold (I'm a copy editor) but actually, not only can I decorate better, but also I can at least spell and punctuate the messages correctly!
Hey. That's an idea. Have these shops hire copy editors. No cake goes out without being proofread first.
"When there's no more room in Hell, the dead will eat venison."
Am I the only one who initially read it as "Happy Birthday, you old Postcard"? hahahaha.
Is that a plastic deer head? Creepy.
"Pastard" = what happens when an old bastard goes out to pasture
Brilliant!
HAAAA!!!!!! The first one looks like something from Bambi's worst nightmare.
But the deer themselves are nicely done...they must be some sort of plastic add on?
hahahaha! Im not sure what to think about this......is it really supposed to be flames? If so .....that is terrible.......if not it's still terrible but in an un-sad sort of way!
The deer has got to be plastic, how else would it look so good and the rest look so wrecky?
It's like a bad Bambi flashback!
Huh, and I thought Halloween was over...
Aha, the second cake makes it clear that the deer is not beconing from the fiery pits of hell...it's standing next to an autumn tree in a grassy field...you know, with yellowed, tall grass...right?
Nothing says "I love you" like a frosting rendition of torching Bambi. Unless of course you call that special someone an "old pastard."
Sadly, I know WAY too many men that would LOVE that!
Those deer are smiling at me....
wow... after really thinking about it, methinks that this is supposed to be a deer in the brush during hunting season (fall). However, you really shouldn't have to think that hard to figure out what a picture on a cake actually is!!!
And just in case you weren't sure if the deer was on fire or not, the first cake was sponsored by the letter F... and they were kind enough to hide the sponsor in the shape of a tree.
And lets just assume someone out there is named "Pastard" and the cake wanted to tell Pastard that he's old. It's still wrong! Never mind torching the wildlife. The only thing this cake lacks is some nicely misused quotation marks!
This is the worst nightmare of all deer hunters. That the deer they've bagged are all coming back from hell to torment their souls . .in cake form that is.
I see two sides to this cake. Having hunted with my husband I can tell you the flames are probably meant to be long grass that is of course brown because prime deer season is usually fall-ish, so of course the grass is dead - and the sprinkles are leaves falling off the tree. But it's really badly executed. That's the practical side.
The fanciful side says that you're right and it's really flames. And Satan couldn't afford to hire four horsemen (even with outsourcing) let alone four horses because PETA wouldn't let him, so all he could find was ol' demon buck here.
The apocalypse is upon us and Bambi is SERIOUSLY pissed about what happened to his mother.
Oh you old Pastard. Not quite a bastard. I was thinking maybe the decorator wrote it upside down but then that would be "pastarq." :D
Maybe the 'flames' are late summer grasses? At least that's what it looks like on the second one. The first one is as successful at that as it is in portraying a tree.
Maybe it was a cross between the "correct" inscription and a wish that the recipient be "Hoisted on his own Petard"? I know it's a stretch, but "your old Pastard" kinda sounds like it...
I'm not sure I agree with you about the fire- I think its fall grass that's turned gold- and the thing on the side is supposed to be a tree? With Autumn leaves? But it does LOOK like it's supposed to be fire, doesn't it? Either way, the deer is clearly possessed by Satan. :)
Is anyone else having flashbacks to the fire scene in "Bambi"? Just me? Ok. I'm also reminded of the Woodland Critters Christmas, for all you South Park fans out there...
The first cake looks just like the rehearsal cake on Bridezillas with Cari & Rebecca. Lol. I think it is her cake.
That first cake needs an inscription like: "See you in Hell, Pastard."
BTW, Shira-Chan: I read the second one as Postcard, too.
Hate to be a spoil sport because I love looking at all the specimen cakes with the same cynical skewed scrutiny as our blog host, but c'mon. Those aren't forest fire cakes! They are lovely autumn depictions of deer gazing lovingly through meadow straw and bare nekkid trees save for a few acorns (shuddering at that word!). Not buying that, huh? Okay then, roasted venison for everyone!
Alixandra Hice
http://casahice.blogspot.com
I posted my pic on my own blog... I actually think my grocery's decorator has some skillz since the grass and tree look pretty dang good... the idea still seems way wrong, though.
http://eternallizdom.blogspot.com
I figure you must know this, but that's a tree and those are autumn grasses, because deer season is in the autumn. But it does appear to be a deer peering out from a grassfire, doesn't it?
What the hell's a Postard?
What is a Pastard?
Can I just say that I initially read that as "Your old Postcard". Way to be confusing.
I'm pretty sure the top one is telling me 'F U'
Poor Bambi. =( Really they spelled it Pastard?!
I'm about to admit something horrible...that first cake -- I think it was a groom's cake at a wedding in South Carolina in the spring. I say that because it appeared on the WE show "Bridezillas" And now I've just admitted to watching that trainwreck.
(Oh and the bride complained that it didn't LOOK homemade enough.)
OMG - I saw someone carrying one of these at a Walmart in rural VA. Unfortunately I didn't have my camera. I'm glad someone else got a picture of.
I'm just creeped out with the floating deers head.
Shira-chan said... Am I the only one who initially read it as "Happy Birthday, you old Postcard"?
I read it as "Happy Birthday, your old Postcard. Which makes even less sense, actually.
I read that as "Your old postcard".
Creepy doe-eyes aside..why on earth would there be more than one of these?! What occasion could possibly merit a red-velvet version of one of the final scenes from Bambi? Although I think it's sweet that "Your old Pastard" cared enough to send it to someone =)
OH GOOD...someone else saw this too. I thot I was the only one. IN the first one, the thing that jumped out at me is a letter F in the tree and a U in the deer's antler's. Warped sense of humor on the decorater's part??? LOL
The second one...*shakes head* NO words can do it justice
BTW...love the site. I am going shopping today and am taking my camera along..HEHEHE!
Whoever made cake #1 needs to realize that the star tip is not the ideal tool for every single decorating task.