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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Jul112013

Burger Points

Tips for making the perfect hamburger cake:

- Make it round

...ish.

 

- Include appetizing toppings:

Tentacles and earth worms optional.

 

- Mini-burger cakes can be piles of fun!

(Garnish with corn sprinkles for an experience your customers won't be able to pass by.)

 

- To really add to the "burger" illusion, try a light sprinkling of sesame seeds:

 

- Or the ever-popular condiment rope:

 

- Just don't forget the icing!

 

- And to make your cakes extra memorable, throw in something unexpected. You know, like Funyons:

Believe me, your customers won't soon forget the pungent combination of onion powder and chocolate icing. No matter how hard they try.

 

- However, if you must make a fun "beverage" to go with your burger cake, NEVER MAKE IT CHOCOLATE.

And btw, to the baker who first thought filling one cup with chocolate icing was a good idea: it's too soon. It will ALWAYS be too soon.

(If you don't get it, for the love of Stay Puft, don't google it.)

 

- And finally, when all else fails:

Go with hot dogs.

 

Thanks to E., Martha R., Tharr, April R., Susan M., Amy M., K.F., & Stephanie M. for the grilling.

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Reader Comments (73)

I googled it expecting something somehow more horrifying than what I got. Meh. I guess I have the brain of an 8th grader because I guessed what a poop cup was.

About the cakes? I wish I could unsee the last one. Really.

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGinger

uhm... they actually have a cake version of the, er... cup one... the original (photo cake with a plastic cup of... frosting)
but maybe you already knew that?
but, yes, for those of you lucky enough to NOT know what we are referencing? please know, it is not something that you can UN-see. so, please for the love of god and all that is holy do not ask anyone what to google.
and consider yourself fortunate.

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered Commentercalamityjane

@ Danny.... Touché, my dear, touché! Or should I say tuchy? ;)

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMovieMom

@kaat - i don't have a bucket for you, but sitting here with my friends we decided we could spare you two cups instead. we will still have one left that we can share. *

*sorry, couldn't resist

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLcP

@Laxmom:
Why not? It could be documented under "cake envy."
=^-.-^=

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

For those who must know that the reference is, I will let you know what to google, with two disclaimers.

1. It is PORN
2. It is one of the most disgusting things I've ever had the misfortune to see.

I warned you.
Google: two girls, one cup.

If you value your innocence, don't. However if you just can't stand not to be in the know, well, there you go.

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHippie2MARS

And here I thougt i would never have to be reminded of that cup ever again! But you are too too funny!

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

Giggling! This site makes my day :D

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAngelique

The "poop cup" looks to be chocolate ice cream. I think the box even says in the lower corner that is "Ice Cream & Cake Creations". At least I am hoping that's what it is!

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNicole

I tried Googling the thing about the cup, but got nowhere. Then I started reading the comments on this post and got all the explanation I needed. Thankfully, I've never seen what Jen was referring to, but I know enough about it to know that I don't *want* to see it.

As for the "hot dog" = EWWW!!!!!!

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPaul W.

I, personally, WISH I didn't get the cup reference. For those of you with insatiable curiousity, this is one of those times you need to step back and not give in. What has been seen cannot be unseen, and that is one of the few things in my life I truly wish I could unsee.

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKatie McGatey

While I know the cup reference, I'm glad to say I've never actually watched said reference. And I'm eternally grateful.

These cakes not only put me off cakes, but burgers, fries and shakes, too. Thank goodness I already dislike hotdogs.

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMyra

@ Craig re:
Subsequent 'discussion' with security guard: "But I'm doing this store a favor! This one I haven't spatulated yet -- what does it remind you of?"
SG: "(hurk) You have a point. Carry on."

SEE??? THIS is why I think all DOC raids should be carried out after the store closes!! We'd get so much more done every night...

July 11, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

@ Barbara Anne - But raids that late cut into my beauty sleep! How about we do like my hubby & do some pre-dawn raids instead? Remember Ben Franklin? "Early to bed & early to rise..." ;-)

July 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

Jen Yates, I love you.

July 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJo

Why? Why did you do it? I wouldn't have thought of it if you hadn't said "don't Google it." I would have happily gone on with my life, without having stopped for long enough to think of you-know-what.

But you just had to go and ruin everything.

July 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBorg

Oh for the love of all things that are tasty DO NOT GOOGLE. I haven't and I know what the reference is to.. and I really don't want the nightmare that would probably come with it once seen. Just hearing about it was enough. Trust us don't do it lol. As for the cakes I so wonder if anyone bought the one with the funyons on it. Yuck!

July 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Why is #6 sticking it's tongue out at me??

July 12, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterdoodlebug

@KarateLady (wailing piteously) but some of these stores have bakers that are in there by 5am!!

July 12, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

My 4 year old saw the first picture and said "Ew that's disgusting what is it? That's so disgusting no one's going to want to eat that disgusting cake!"

July 13, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMel

Nine cake wrecks...
One cup...

July 13, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPinkie Pie

The cake with the shake I believe is in reality an ice cream cake. Making the shake actually soft serve Ice cream not frosting. The reason I say this is because the cake flavor is cookie dough, which is a flavor of Blizzard from DQ and they also make cakes in that flavor as well. Which makes that a little more appetizing now doesn't it.

July 14, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterangel shrout

@Barbara Anne - ok, ok, OK! Night raids it is. <sigh>

July 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

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