The Search for the World's Most Disturbing Shower Cake ENDS HERE
July 22, 2011
Heads up!
Wow. This is so stinkin' sexy, I almost didn't even notice the outie belly button.
Because fetus cookies are SO last year:
Goes great with mother's milk.
And lots of screaming.
Proving once again that bakers are taking posts on this blog as inspiration:
I'm torn (ha! Ew.) between asking what that gray pouch thing hanging out is and desperately, desperately, not wanting to know. In fact, know what? Don't tell me. I'm never having kids, so knowing what the inner lining's poop chute or whatever looks like is just one of those things I never need to know. Seriously. Leave me to my blissful ignorance.
And finally, look. I realize that a lot of talent was required to make some of these wrecks - I do! However, no amount of talent will ever make any part of this look yummy to me:
In fact, you could say the amount of talent a baker has when making a placenta has an inverse reaction to how much I want to eat said placenta.
Or, in other words:
SWEET BETTY CROCKER I AM NEVER EATING AGAIN.
Thanks to Matt R., Sarah M., Carl G., & Heather A. for today's gut-busters. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to skip lunch.
Reader Comments (413)
Oh man are those ever gross! Who on earth would want any of these for a baby shower cake? Sorry wreckerators but this time you nearly made me lose my dinner. Man if they do this now I can't wait to see what they scare me with in October. Lol waits while hiding under my bed.
Wow. and Ewww.
I've been a L&D nurse for 16 years, & I've NEVER seen anything like that gray blob on a string...
I love my job & I don't even think it's gross, but seeing a C/S table (quite accurately portrayed, except for the dead baby on it) as an edible offering made my stomach turn!
I'm with all the others who said that just because you can make something so realistic doesn't mean you should!
*barf*
The placenta isn't even realistic looking. If it looked more real then it would be gross...
For my very vain and very pretty sister I gave her a coffin cake for her 40th birthday. Her friends thought it was a major put down. I should send them these pics and they can see what disgusting really is!
I thought at first the last one was an autopsy for a stillborn, full-term baby. I couldn't imagine anyone wanting to commemorate that event.
Maybe the jaundice will give them a clue why it died.
dear god no. no.no.no.no. its stuck in my head now. NO
This page qualifies as a diet aid and birth control at the same time. Well done!
WV: swering. That one's too easy.
..that first one, she was a porn "actress", got pregnant, and via scientific anomoly baby pops out her belly button.. thank goodness no stretch marks, she thinks, her "career" is saved.. However her belly button is now like crater lake. So now she works at Hooters.
So we're going to use these cakes as proof that the parents are unfit right?
"The Search for the World's Most Disturbing Shower Cake ENDS HERE?" Some sick bakers might just take that as a challenge.
AAARRGGHH!!! The baby looks dead!! That is so awful!
How much you wanna bet nurses made the last cake? And maybe the bloody abdomen (with proper surgical draping) above it. And that placenta is a masterpiece, you must admit. Excellent detail! And the shininess! Perfect. Yeah. Fer sure.
Of all my time reading Cake Wrecks, I do believe the close-up of the placenta is the closest I have come to puking on my keyboard. Holy smokes, that is one stomach-turning cake!
Okay -- so they had a contest to see who could create a cake that absolutely no one would want to eat.
Contestant 1 - baby bursting out of belly. Good job.
Contestant 2 - twin fetuses in suitcase size uterus. Excellent!
Contestant 3 - surgical drape with baby arm and leg protruding. Awesome.
Contestant 4 - dead baby with placenta and medical instruments. We have a winner. No one is gonna eat that cake. or any cake, ever.
BTW I've had two kids, seen the placenta but I am sure baby and placenta were never side by side.
wv: aeglu, the sound I made right after I read the post about the placenta shake.
I would hate to be the person who has to cut into the baby for everyone to "enjoy" the cake. Maybe that's why they make them look so extremely unappetizing...so no one actually has to cut or eat it.
Blech. That is all.
I am on OR nurse and have worked c-sections. They NEVER put a baby on the sterile table unless it is dead.
Thanks Jen,
Stomach upset, retinas burned out!
And who wants to eat medical instruments, either? The surgical suite just isn't what it used to be...
I can only echo the other *Eeuuuuuwwww* comments... but I have to say something, just 'cause of my WV this time.
WV: seeneu - I looked at those cakes and I seeneu (seen eeeuuuwww)! Or, perhaps, Hey, Mary, I seeneu look at the cake and run for the Ladies' - how come?...oh.
Merry from Annie's Book Stop, Sharon, MA
Wow. Such negativity. I was considering sharing with everybody my vasectomy reversal party cake. Not now. Sorry haters.
Seriously though, I visit this blog on my lunchbreak. NSFL!
Amazing......(smiley face)
My eyes! MY EYES!!! AAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGG!
OMW! who starts planning a baby shower with the idea that the cake should resemble a hands on anatomy class ICK x 10
A big, huge THANK YOU to Naomi, Craig & Isolder74 for making me laugh. That's why I read the comments.
J & J(thoJ), put an "antidote" link at the end of posts like this to a Sunday Sweets of your choice (preferably off topic).
I was with a friend for the birth of her third child and saw nothing that disturbing- probably because we had a beautiful REAL baby to fuss over.
-Barbara Anne
Holy moly! I haven't commented on CW in along time, mostly because other commenters have already said what I'm thinking. this is no different except that I CANNOT COMPREHEND THE PEOPLE WHO WOULD ORDER OR MAKE THESE CAKES!!!
I kind of want to go back and look again, just to see the detail I scrolled over quickly out of horror, but not sure I can. And I've been through child birth twice.
the cakes are creepy... but the placenta is the only accurate looking thing! the babies look plastic/dead. but alright bakers, the placenta looks amazing!!!
That second one is the Deal Sisters' birthday cake. Apt for ladies fronting The Breeders, yes?
I happen to find it. . . charming.
YUUUUUCK!! those look so disgusting they should be used as weight loss tools...... what is a placenta doing in a cake?? seriously....what the f*** where they thinking??? (I´m going to have some placenta related nightmares..)
The first one is cute in a weird sort of way and the baker does have talent.
But the second one reminds me of the horror movie "Sisters," about psychotic Siamese twins, and that last one...well, if you've ever seen the 70's movie "It's Alive," you'll know what I mean.
I love horror movies, but don't make them into foods that are supposed to be edible!
Wow. I like how you sequenced them so that each one was grosser and more disturbing than the previous one. Placenta in a bowl? SO, so sick.
I agree, some of the comments are worse than the cakes! If you've ever thought about eating a placenta, please don't share. And seriously, delivering a baby with a dog in the vicinity, running around licking things?? Why even bother washing your hands?
Question - to all those horrified by the stillborn baby on the last cake - agreeing that no one (at least, no one *I* would socialize with) wants to eat a slice of dead baby - wouldn't it be yet more horrifying if it looked like the baby was ALIVE? [shuddering and gagging back dinner]
WV: baici ba'icing! ba', ba' icing!
"In the Delivery Room...noone can hear you scream"
That last one... oh dear God. Placentas just don't belong as decorations on cakes, even if some people are eating them. Props if you think eating your placenta is good and can roll with it, but I just can't get over how incredibly gross that is.
SunnyRed, the surgical SWEET isn't what it used to be! ;)
Ughhh!
I am a trauma nurse. We have strong stomachs. We regularly eat italian food while discussing gun shot wounds, amputations, and evisceration. But that last cake is something something else completely.
I have been present at many births, and unfortunately also at a few which were stillborn. You never, EVER, ever put the baby on the sterile table. You lovingly wrap it in a blanket. The parents (and every medical person I've ever seen in those scenarios) need to grieve. The maker of this cake clearly has medical knowledge, because the table is set very accurately. My question is why someone with that level of skill couldn't have put the baby in a completely separate cake, in a warmer or bassinet... or better yet, left the baby out of the cake completely.
Ughhh!
If anyone hears horrified whimpering, it's from me.
Eeeehehehehewwwwwwwww!!!
D:
I think these cakes are beautiful. As a woman who desperately wants to have a child, I have lecture that childbirth is a wonderful, natural thing and these cakes areherurburfuruperbleeeeeeeech...
...Excuse me. I just threw up!
Oh CRAP! What if that means I'm pregnant?
*runs screaming*
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
sigh, Blogger has been eating random comments of mine over the past few months...unless I'm more rude than I know and J & J(thoJ) have deleted them (but I don't think so).
Anyway, day 3 trying to comment I'll leave it at Naomi, Craig & Isolder74 (I totally heard Doc Brown) are freakin' hilarious!
-Barbara Anne
*jaw hanging open*
*eye twitch*
I didn't just see this, right?
And these are obviously DELIBERATE--I mean, it's not an accidental poo pile or ghastly red mass of goo that were mistakes. No, these are people deliberately trying to make cakes that look like fetuses and placentas. For . . . eating?
Um, why exactly?
The last one looks like David Cronenburg's birthday cake.
That last cake looks like an autopsy cake. *shudder*
What are the people who request these cakes thinking? Oh. Right. They're NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
All I can ask is why? WHY?!?!?!
my wife gave birth to our 2nd child in a birthing center where the midwives were a little TOO natural and hippie if you know what I mean.
They asked us if we wanted to keep our placenta?
I was all, "WHY?????" "Why would you ask me that? That's the MOST vile thing you could ask a person.
They explained to me that MANY of the women who give birth there keep the placenta, either planting it under a new tree as a 'birth tree', chopping it up and putting it in capsules for vitamins and ingesting it over time, or for the brave, they eat it as a steak. Supposedly it tastes like liver."
I seriously was so incredibly sick to my stomach that we changed our birth plan to include the fact that we wanted nothing to do with the placenta, and I didn't want to have to see it if possible.
Yuck.
ugh.
and my wife is 7 months pregnant right now. I am sick to my stomach real bad. real. bad.
Oh, barf!
How hilariously gross! Coincidentally, you put up this post just before I my friend's baby shower that I was hosting! Fortunately, I should say. We went with boring (and less gut-wrenching) cheesecake and cupcakes, but now I wish I had ordered something more "unique"! Love this blog.
I think the saddest/sickest part is: SOMEONE had to think these twisted cakes up and actually ORDER them. (can you imagine THAT converstaion!?) Pity the baker who had to do these, most likely put them off breeding forever. UGH, revolting.
These cakes also assist my weight watchers diet plan in a great many ways! Thank you party planners!!!