A Lesson in Español
August 25, 2010 Hola! Hello! I'm Dora! Soy Dora! Can you say Dora? Muy bueno! Will you join me on my cake adventure today? Soy un mucho kaka adventuroso el manana? Si! Vamos!
Oh no! Boots has escaped from my backpack and is lost in the woods! El sabatos escapada en la foresta. Will you help me find him?
...
Great! Let's put on our magic masks that will help us find Boots! El findos de monkey!
Perfecto! Can you say "serial killer?" голяма работа! Now we can see through the trees and find Boots! El seeya de fromage en ravioli!
Look! There he is! Vous les vous en la baguette, sil vous plait!
C'mon, Boots! Jump back into my backpack! We can continue our adventure! Donde esta el gato caliente gordita en la bicyclette!
Oh no! Boots got scared and ran further into the woods! We need to find him! Mondo monkey lookey lookey!
Hurry! Que mucha don Toyota Hyundai von Schmellingberg! Senor nacho libre des sombrero el Salma Hayek? Dos frijoles! Mucho grande!
Hey! There's Boots now! He's made it through the woods and is flying a plane back home! El esta makey no sense at allos! Let's catch a ride!
Thanks for the ride, Boots! It's great to have you back home. Willkommen to los hermana! We wouldn't have found you without the help from our viewers at home! Son tan estupidos!
I'm so happy! Feliz cumpleaños! Por favor don esta el Tori, Lauren H., Rachel W., Kat D., Danielle B., e Dan H. Muy grande el biadorenos le trejamos via monkeytown! (As far as I know, "biadorenos le trejamos" translates into nothing at all... just to save you time on Google translate.) Update! John's helpful translation guide.
Come back next week, mi amigos, when Boots and I go to night school! Soy en dos tres dental hygienists! Adios!
Hola- I'm pretty sure that means hello.
Backpack- That's a type of sack you wear over your shoulders.
Baguette- A type of bread.
Feliz cumpleaños- Merry Christmas.
Por favor mantenganse alejado de las puertas- No idea.
Reader Comments (168)
ROFL!! PLEASE STAND CLEAR OF THE DOORS!!! Looove the Disney monorail Spanish thrown in
To properly do a Dora post, you must type everything in CAPS... she never speaks below a yell.
Es muy brilliant. :D
I don't think I could love you guys more.
Poop Adventures? *snort* Kaka or Caca is Spanish slang for feces.
You can purchase all these cakes and many more wonderful items at our new bakery, Chateau de la Casa Haus!
Just make sure you stand clear of the doors! Vamanos!
I wish I didn't know that the cake with the plane was supposed to be Madagascar 2. Although, the only recognizable thing on it was the plane.
I hope it didn't land on Dora. Oh wait, yes I do.
Unfortunately, I could hear Dora's shrill voice shouting all of that in my head. Except for the Russian (?) because I can't even imagine what that would sound like.
For the couple of comments correcting the translation of Feliz cumpleaños...I think John was just being sarcastic to add to the humor...
All the Spanish I remember I learned from Sesame Street. Despite that, this translated very well.
Oh, and be sure to stay clear of the doors. And the Dora wrecks! *shudder*
Oh dear gods, help me, I'm laughing so hard, I can't breathe.
This is simply a-Dora-bull; I can only say...ecties, mi camarones! Buenos manzanillas en su banos!
Dora the Explorer- teaching your kids Spanglish since 2000
I love your writing, Jen! I was so interested in the words, I didn't pay much attention to the cakes, lol! I'm going back to take a good look now.
WV: cakeyde Dora es una cakeyde monstruo!
I lived in Miami for a few years, and thanks to my Cuban co-workers and having to deal with Canadians (who all seemed to be from Eastern Europe), I understood this post perfectly!
Ay que rico!
Love this! I had tears runnign down my face from laughing!
As for Jon's translation:
Feliz cumpleaños- HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Feliz Navidad - Merry Christmas
Bwahahahahahahahahahaha!! Best episode of Dora ever!!! I love all the Spanglish, Spanish, French, and Russian. She's so international these days.
I feel like I just read a poorly translated Chinese instruction manual into multiple languages! Hahaha, Dora would be proud.
This reminds me of the SNL TV Fun House "Maraka" spoof on Dora. If you have not seen it, do google search for it. (The NBC.com video is the clearest).
Why, oh why does Boots have a uterus? Maybe that's why he looks so psychotic....
Thanks again for the laughs Jen!
And only three people felt compelled to correct your "translations" - I was expecting "Epcot el Segundo"!! People - it's HUMOR!
Good lord...
I never say this but OMG!!!
I have tears running down my face and am choking from the laughter over the 'translations'.
Holy manglish of all nations, Batman, er..Jen!
The cakes are scary enough, just trying to be Dora, but I have to admit I really didn't look at the wrecks. I was too astounded by the text.
~~Di
wv - coulnest -- this post was the mucho coulnest of all.
Por favor mantenganse alejado de las puertas- No idea.
Hilarious!
What's up with the "Hang in Here" cake?
Actually, feliz cumpleaños = Epcot too ☺☻☺☻☺
WV: felmodae. I fell off mo daebed laughing por este posto
¡Feliz navidad!
O.M.G. My poor sons have been scarred for life, seeing their mother nearly die choking on a gummi bear while reading this post...
WV: whobiano- Not sure what it means but I'm pretty sure it belongs in the post somewhere...
OMG...can't breathe...laughing so hard...hilarious!!
LOLOLOLOL Yep there went coffee directly out my nose onto the keyboard.
But Oh So Worth it! (As Always!!)
Y'all are the highlight of my day. Thank you!
Feliz cupleanos is Happy Birthday, not Merry Christmas. Nice try, though. xD
"Please stand clear of the sliding glass doors."...seriously the only thing I remember from 7 years of Spanish...
Bi-lingual (or quad-lingual?) snarkiness. LOVE IT!
OMG today's post was hilarious!!
The last cake looks like Dora sticking her tongue out and showing us an infection/growth/food particle underneath. She should be more concerned about the mole on the right. Pauvre, pobre Dora.
elatian: One who is elated. Unlike those that received cakes like these.
Hey, John, you might not have realized this, so I thought I'd be helpful and bring it to your attention, but Feliz Cumpleanos = Happy Birthday, not Merry Christmas. Duh.
'Cause you weren't trying to be funny or anything, of course.
This one made my head hurt.
You know those cakes are F'ed up when my 4 year old who LOVES Dora can't even figure out who those are supposed to look like.
I always wondered about the log ride myself. Even after living in South America I never could translate: "Deramoni sersen. Tados, por favor"
My favorite thing about Dora are the inane pauses. Are they annoying or not?
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
( blink, blink )
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Right! . . . They ARE annoying!
!Gracias, mon ami, por una posta mas funnisimo!
Take the monorail over to the Magic Kingdom, where the Tomorrowland Speedway recording will admonish you, "No choque el auto de enfrente."
Can someone please explain to me what is so funny about today's post? Why the massacre of foreign languages? What does this have to do with Dora the explorer? I've never watched Dora, what is it all about? I simply don't get the joke.
No day is complete without 1. Cake Wrecks and 2. a Flight of the Conchordes reference. Woh hoh hoh....baguette! GOSH I LOVE MULTITASKING. thx guys
I only took one term of Spanish in college. I got some of it but certainly not all of it. Tomorrow's post should be a translation of this post! Lol. Good work. Because of Dora my 3-year old chooses to speak spanish instead of english, the language the rest of her family speaks. Maybe she can translate this one for me... hmm it's a thought... ;)
-Alyssa
OMG! That's got to be one of the funniest things I've seen in ages!!! And some of the scariest cakes!
I LOVE John's handy dandy translation guide!! (with the ref to the wdw monorail!!! "Porfavor mantenganse alejados de las puertas" was one of the first spanish phrases I learned! That, and "Donde esta el baño")
Yiskah "Si se puede!" Petit
OMG!!!! Jajajaja (cause that's the way you laugh in Spanish)
I loved today's post. I live in Chile (proud home of the chilean snuggly bug, if you remember that post) and I'm an English Translator/Interpreter... so you can just imagine how hard I laughed today.
Also, ever wondered what "maraka" stands for?... jajaja, homework my queridos amiguitos.
Mucho felicitacion por sus bueno sitio internés. Yo corazón it.
"Vous les vous en la baguette, sil vous plait!" ... I have no idea what you meant, but at least you're polite. I love it!
Costumeholic: You mean "Donna la Culturiste"? It IS hilarious!
I agree with Dani, your spanish is perfect for a gringa tonta. I bet you pull it out every time you drink a margarita.
That last cookie monstrosity seems to be implying that Dora has Treacher-Collins Syndrome. Poor girl. Who knew?!?!!
WV: prathyt - Leave us all prathyt these wreckorators seek other lines of work. Soon.
30 some years ago I took several languages in colleges and ended up with a French major and Spanish minor. With very little practicing since then, I understood your narration perfectly! Bien hecho, tres bien!
Please stand clear of the doors. Por favor mantenganse alejado de las puertas.
Yup. That's all I need.
Hi Bluefairy,
No problem. The show, "Dora the Explorer," teaches kids Spanish by constantly translating much of what she says from English to Spanish. I think it's completely awesome and I'm sad that I didn't have something so useful when I was a kid.
The joke today was really that this brilliant child Dora, who probably speaks twelve languages, just decided to mess with everybody and mangle them all together. We were honestly hoping that most folks, regardless of linguistic skill, would recognize some Spanish, French, German, Russian and gibberish and make the connection that we did it on purpose.
My update, which was in response to someone wanting a translation, was meant in jest as well. You know...
You can make some of the people laugh all of the time...
Have a fantastic day!
john
Aye Dios Mio! Pero es que la gente no entienden el humor suyo. Feliz Cumpleños!
Great one today!
High school Spanish was worth it just so I could understand this hilarious post, LMAO