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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Jul262010

Conventional Wisdom

It's possible that I just spent the last four days relentlessly Twitter-stalking everyone at San Diego Comic Con. Possible. You can't prove it. What do you mean, when did I shower last? I'm going for an authentic experience here! Gimmie back my Funyuns.

Anyway, coming down off a convention high - even one acquired vicariously through social networking sites - requires a gradual withdrawal. Yesterday's Sweets helped a little, but really, they were just too good. I need a visual sucker punch to knock me back into reality, you know?

Theeere it is.


Convention...high...evaporating....

And for that final cold blast of reality, this should fit the Bill:

"Oh nooooo!"

I could probably end there, but frankly, this is too much fun.

First rule of cons: always pick a costume that's size-appropriate:

This also applies with cake kits.

Second rule of cons: a lone mask does not a costume make.

Come to think of it, that *also* applies to cakes. And cookies.

Third rule of cons: Lace is never intimidating.


"Join me, Luke, and together we can rule the galaxy as father and...what? What's so funny? Why are you laughing?

"Is it the doily? It is, isn't it? Hutt nuts, I told Palpatine no one would take me seriously in this thing."

And finally, the Na'vi Nazis are here to show us what happens when you mix your sci-fi references:


See, I told them not to open that ark. [shudder] Blech.

Thanks, Deborah, Laux, Shawn F., Tharry, Lizzy S., Julie Anne D., & Shanell C.! See y'all at Dragon*Con. ;)

Note from john: The first cake is supposed to be Iron Man. We think. Most likely. Probably. Okay I'm like 63% sure.

Nappy Blob Blob Katelynn!

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Reader Comments (109)

I would also like to point out that the iron man cupcake cake has been reduced.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGeorganna

Wow...um, yeah...uh, that last picture? Yuck.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

my 4 yo dd knew right off that the first one was Iron Man -- probably because it reasembles one of her own drawings. my favorite bit, though, is that she's sure it's Iron Man made out of HOT DOGS!

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJanelle

"Let me guess, that's made out of sausage" My 4 year old son looking over my shoulder at cake number 1. I don't think I could have said it better.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersalamandermuse

Face of Boe commenter FTW!

WV: halmg... i got nothin'.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

what in the hail is that first one supposed to be?

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterandygirl

Are we sure the first on eisn't Cassandra from Dr. Who?

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

:D That first one--supposed to be Iron Man, right? Except it really, really looks more like Cassandra from Dr. Who. Which is even more disturbing.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cassandra_%28Doctor_Who%29

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterchris

Does anyone else see a woman's chest instead of ears on the carebears?

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Thanks for the note John.... I was certain that the first cake was a swimsuit on a flat chested woman.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTiffany

the first one? what the hell is that? and the batman cookie? it looks like my 3 year old cousin did it.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChristin

I got Iron Man right away on cake #1. I think the slit eyes gave it away. And if nothing else, the color scheme is pretty close.

Also, the Mr. Bill in carbonite rather resembles the scene in Legos Star Wars . . . which is awesomely cute.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh, good, @Squidley had the same thought I did. I was totally going with Silence of the Lambs sewing project, really. But I did eventually come up with Iron Man.

Some days, you eat the cake, and some days, the cake wears your skin for a coat.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterscyllacat

Such a shame they tried to ice it, if they'd stuck with just the mask the gingerbread batman would have been adorable

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChristine

Thanks for the ironman tip... I too thought it was a flesh covered bathing suit with flat breasts on... hamburgers?

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered Commenternoricum

This site is the most wreck-tastic thing ever! I have become a daily follower after a few times of checking it out. I'm really loving the comic-con based cakes, that made my day especially the "iron blob" cake and Darth Doily!

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterteri

Ohmyword. The Iron Man CCC...*shudders in horror*

Actually...just all of them. But the Iron Man one just...makes my heart ache.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

The creatures from the blue-black lagoon...

Are you sure the Na'vi in the last photo are cake and not styrofoam wig stands with icing?

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

I was sure the Carbonite cake was Caillou, in which case I'd say it's about time.

Leona C

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I recognized that first cake as Iron Man before I even saw the entire picture! What's wrong with me?

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterD.B. Echo

thanks for clearing up the Iron man thing... I was having a hard time distinguishing it from my welcome mat.

DV in lace was the best! maybe I'll show it to my 6 yr old so she won't be afraid of him next time the movie is on?

and the "baking nuts" sign above the Na'Vi seems very appropriate... they're nuts if they think this is "baking" at all..

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterT

See now I thought the first one was a Pokemon character...who was having some sort of weird close personal thing with some jelly (OMG are those things TROUT???)

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSapphragette

I thought the first one was a heraldic shield outlined in bacon....

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSandye

Mr. Bill in carbonite = BRILLIANT and not at all a wreck.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWinona

Oy, that pink Care Bear had tits on its forehead. Talk about breast augmentation gone awry...

Also, the pair of Na'vi down there should seek some kind of soothing mask; their faces are, quite literally, melting off.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCat.

The Darth Vader cake actually looks more like a black pug.

KC

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKat

Ohhhhhh... IRON man!!!

*facepalm*

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

I can't remember any Na'vi cake from the post -- seems trauma blocks horrendous sights out of my mind quite well.

Thank goodness.

~~Di

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I thought the first one might be a ladies swimsuit or a man's wife-beater t-shirt. Iron Man definitely did not come to mind.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSusannah

wow. I totally thought the first one was a nude-coloured bathing suit with those little censor bars in strategic places. or ironman. of course.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnners

The Care Bears are going to kill me!

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenny

I think the first one is supposed to be Iron Man...or a casket.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJanna

Why is Batman naked?

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJen

Are we sure the first one isn't a swimming suit?

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMegan

I agree that cake #1 must be Iron Man, but only once I viewed it full-size and saw the plastic things next to the cake. That is definitely a missed mark.
And the Na'avi are seriously creepy.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJulia

Is it just me or do the Care Bear ears/things floating above their eye pieces(?) look like boobs? Aww poor poor Tony Stark... but maybe he could use the hit to his ego?

I'm off to ponder the meaning of life and to shed the last bit of hope I had for humanity. lol

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

the ironman cake looks like it has giant slices of pepperoni coming out the sides!

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersnye

What the heck is that first one anyway? It looks like a hunk of badly rotted meat. It is totally nasty!

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered Commentertottergirl

good lord, what is with bakers

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Are those Care Bears? They look more like Care Weasels!" - my husband puts it in perspective.

Andrea in St. Louis

WV- unnes

"Unnes to git more decor-ratin' skilz!"

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercraftinqueen

How is Mr. Bill encased in carbonite a bad thing? It's awesome :)

July 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelanie S

That first cake looks like someone threw slabs of bacon on it drew in a couple of lines for eyes and then tried to hide the fact that it is a CCC! I could swear I saw cupcakes at the bottom of whatever that cake is lol.

July 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ironman? Too funny. I loved the little faces on the big Care Bears!

July 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBeth

I'm glad you added the note about the first cake. WOW. I adore Iron Man, loved the movies, but I did not recognize the cake *at all*. I thought it was a... torso. With red around it. And white lines for some reason. -hides in corner-

July 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

In the last one, the sign "Baking Nuts" above the aisle must be used to describe the decorators lol

July 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I didn't realize that Ironman was only a headless, dismembered torso. Is that what he looks like under the suit?

July 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAviatrix

That first one: glowing dragon face or sunburned American Indian torso in a dirty tank top?

July 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@anon 9:48 LOL so true! What IS the burned n'avi head hair made of? licorice or dirty mop?

July 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

those green lifesaver eyes on the n'avi are CREEPY! baking nuts indeed

btw, what kind of store has a whole aisle devoted to baking nuts? (kidding)

July 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@ mama martinez: nursing bathing suit! LOL that's creative!

July 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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