Saturday
May092009
For Mom: The Mother of all Wrecks
May 9, 2009 Moms, this one's for you:
There are no words, Jesse Y. Not after that.
May 9, 2009 
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What's a Wreck?
A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.
Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)
- Jen
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May 9, 2009 
Reader Comments (121)
*blinks* Wow. That's...disturbing.
And it looks like the 'e' on "huge you" was added in as an afterthought. The decorator had it almost right with "hug you" but then squeezed that little 'e' in there, thus rendering this cake even more hilarious. Now I'm going to go huge my mom.
"...and my womb to re-admit you."
Yikes!
This wreckerator needs some therapy.
Woohoo, $9.99 well spent dollars for that masterpiece. somebody's mama gonna slap them upside the head for that one
WV: Dimamas
Dimamas gonna have a wonderful day tomorrow
MOM: Uh...you've just made me very uncomfortable, honey. Thanks!
--Blue Jean
Ok I think I would put this cake next to the "no wire hanger" cake. Together, these cakes could give us a peek inside the mind of a psychotic mother who killed her child with a wire hanger and now misses the dear thing with some kind of orange/melon passion.
Um, never mind. Don't put this with that other cake. Keep them far, far away from each other. I need to go scrub my brain...
whoa... that is a scary scary thing
yikes. Im glad I don't know mother or kid...
How very -- incestuous.....
Orange??? Anyone notice the orange frosting? You have pretty pastel flowers stuck on a Halloween cake, ugh! I would smash that in the face of any child of mine to bring that home.
The cake top itself looks like mashed sweet potato.
The piping crap looks like day-glo Play-Doh.
The *lettering* looks like droppings from an ill bird.
The sentiment is probably/maybe FROM a "mom," because there's a period at the end of the "...kiss you"-- although the structure of the entire message is limping along disjointedly.
Actually, it's not just limping; it is in crying, agonizing misery and should be humanely destroyed for the sake of all.
*agress with Ddc*
Yeah, that's an Oedipus cake if I ever saw one. EEK!
This is creepy
The thing is it almost looks like 'mom' is an afterthought. So maybe the cake was slightly less creepy to begin with.
I don't even have words.... yeah. Nothing's coming. Wow.
Oh, and PS, I'm SOOOOO glad different people finally noticed the crie-ing and xissing. Good God, why are these cake decorators still employed?!
Wow, is it 2 feet from the sun?? What is with that coloring?! Crazy.
Perhaps the writer of this touching verse did not have English as his/her first language.
And to think, all that for just $7.99!
To Laura:
Yeah, but if you notice the price tag it is $7.99 with a Kroger Card only. Non-club-card members have to pay the full masterwreck value of $9.99.
...which could be worth every penny if it goes to an evil stepmom. XD
Apart from the fact that the only person I can think of who would want to send that message to their mother is a guy called Oedipus, and yes the misspelling is wrecky but am I the only one who noticed the colour scheme?
Two clashing but equaly unapatising shades of red, and then theirs the topper...
I guess it's one of those wrecks that gets worse the longer you look at it.
It's an Oedipedal http://www.engrish.com/" REL="nofollow">Engrish cake.
The world needed a Cake Wrecks/Engrish crossover, and now it has one. :3
All I can say is "Huh?"
Eeek! My eyes hurt so from the color scheme, I almost didn't notice the bizarre sentiment!
Wow.
Analyze that!
Huh...I didn't know Oedipus was into celebrating mother's day...
It wouldn't have been so bad if they'd spelled "hug" properly (and how on earth does one misspell a three letter word?)...and if it wasn't addressed to Mom. Creepy. Even if it was from a guy who refers to his wife as "mom" the way some people do, it's creepy, possibly even more so.
WHOAH NELLIE!
this beats my mothers day tree cake for miles
Somebody needs some therapy.
And what COLOR is that anyway?
Wow..a cake for Mother Bates.
Wow, that is a lot of crying body parts.
How funny, they caught their spelling mistake on crie and changed it to cry and then changed the correct spelling of hug to huge. This person must be a person where English is their second language.
Look where the dot is in the K. It's definitely not an X it's a K. The decorator did get that right. Let's not try to find fault where there isn't any here people.
Ok, that is stupid and totally creepy.
That cake made me sad, then it made me laugh. Thank for making me spit milk out of my nose!
Um, yeah. Can you say Oedipus complex? Nasty. And not to mention the ridiculous spelling error, the cake looks like moldy play-doh. Blech. $7.99 doesn't get you what it used to, eh?
These are the most fantastically horrible cakes I have ever seen...
and OMG,..."No coat hangers" WTF not that I would ever summon the courage to taste that cake, but thats a bit distasteful... bahahaha
Yeah lets hope tomorrow i do not get a cake that has the word "HUGE" in it.
www.mycreativeway.blogspot.com
Oedipus complex, anyone?
I'm printing this out and making my mom the most epic Mother's Day card she's ever seen in her 21 years of Malker Sotherhood. She's going to laugh soooo muuuuuch!!!
Oddly enough, my eyes cry to see this XD
Because the second one is about being able to do something, etc, I took the meaning of this to be:
I cry when I see you, you're too large to hug. Loves and kisses!
But I have a feeling the original message (in broken English) is probably more like:
I have eyes to cry when I see you, I have arms to hug you, I have lips to kiss you.
(Note that the first sentence is still really bad. There's no way around it. Crying when you see someone is, no matter what, really, really insulting.)
I think the mom thing at the end is just to point out that it's for Mother's Day.
Essentially the wreckorator failed to grasp the verb to be. We're either missing complex sentences involving to have or more simple sentences with to be. This person would have to be foreign. (Which isn't insulting--better to not have English as a first English and mess up with it than have it your ONLY language and this is how you talk.)
Dr Freud to the bakery, STAT.
it's so wrong... in so many ways...
if my memory is correct, it's a totally hacked excerpt of a poem about the death of a child.
which brings it to a whole new level of totally awful cakes.
aHow rude to do a wreck on sunday sweets day.. and mother's day.. bad form..... i expected more from you....
But what does "my arms to huge you" mean?
"aHow rude to do a wreck on sunday sweets day.. and mother's day.. bad form..... i expected more from you...."
This is most definitely not a Sunday Sweets post.
And you think it's rude for the author to post cake wrecks on a site called "Cake Wrecks"? I'm dumbfounded!
Anon @ 9:07,
You can't imagine how OLD it gets reading comments like yours. It's not bad enough getting people who genuinely have a gripe with the post for some reason. Then you come in with your little "I expected more from you" when YOU'RE READING YESTERDAY'S POST!!!
So hey, the Mother's Day Sunday Sweets went up about a minute ago so enjoy!
I'm going back to bed...
john
Someone mentioned that this...questionable cake inscription has its roots in a poem written to express sorrow at the loss of a child. Does anyone know what the title of the poem was? I'm curious to see how it actually read before getting syntactically butchered...and transformed into a dumbfoundingly creepy attempt at Mother's Day sentiment.
WV: eming: I keep 'eming and 'awing trying to explain this cake.
I... uh...
It looks like a huge pumpkin tart! How appropriate on Mothers Day. I sincerely like the border. It's an attractive shade of artificial colour. The words make me think of an old Beatles song....I've got arms that long to huge you, and keep you by my side...I've got lips that long to Xiss you, and keep you satisfied (Woooo)!