"Uncle!"

In the spirit of Angry Santa, I give you...
TERRIFIED UNCLE SAM.
"Whoah there, sonny, why don't you put down the knife and let's talk about this?"
Uncle Sam wants YOU...
... to fetch him his binky.
And check under the bed before you leave.
(And buy a Pan-Wow®)
Actually, now he's just looking sad. Geez, Sam, if I want to see a disappointed face at mealtimes I can just go back to cooking, mmkay?
Hang on, lemme see what else I've got here...
Oh, now, don't cry... I'm sorry...
Aaand we're back to terrified. Huh.
Maybe they set it in front of a mirror?
I actually kind of like this guy:
His face says, "Guys, seriously, stop it with the shaving cream already," but his hair is all, "PAR-TAY!!" And then his sideburns are like, "Lookit me, holding up this teensy flag! AMERICA. HECK YEAH." And I'm pretty sure his lips are offering me a fruit roll-up.
So, in conclusion, here's a gingerbread soldier with his head on fire being run over by a tank:
But look how HAPPY he is!
Uncle Sam? Take note.
Tanks to Meghan R., Dimitra S., Gillian H., Amber W., & Lyndi R. for the support.
Reader Comments (68)
Welcome back, your royal highest snarkiness. Hope you're feeling better.
Oh, SuBee, that (*sniff*) was just beeyouteafull. And then a second one? (swoon)
Yay, Sharyn!! I heard James Cagney.
KarateLady- I thought tribble, too! :D
{should I stage an intervention?}
[no, he's really fine]
{but should he have put it out there in writing- it's like evidence now}
[any men-in-white (coats) would have to get past Theardare to get him]
{WHEW}
Skewed View I applaud you!
I want a plush version of cake #6!
Well thanks so much for the laughing fit. I can't even see Uncle Sam on these things lol. They all look terrified of being smashed ala Mr. Bill. Scary and hilarious.
All but one of yesterday's commenters will be delighted to learn that Theardare has added all CW song parodies to his Room 101 arsenal. Not because they're bad, but because America.
[Is that really a reason?]
{Yes. Now reintegrate.}
[As you w...]
This post really made me want to hit a "like" button or thumbs up or reblog or something. I'm desperately stifling my laughter because my mother is sleeping in the next room. Definitely one of my favorite posts to date.
The first thing I thought of when I saw that next to last cake was that he looks like "The Funk", from the "Old Gregg" episode of "The Mighty Boosh"; You see The Funk is a living creature about the size of a medicine ball but all covered in teats. One day Parliament were traveling on the Mothership, foolin' around with The Funk, when George Clinton kicked The Funk clean over board. That was July 2nd 1979, the day The Funk died... but was mysteriously reincarnated as a cake. A very, very funky cake. Eat a slice of that, next thing you know, you'll be playing slap-bass like Bootsy Collins.
Glad you're feeling better; keep eating yogurt!
Storm
Welcome back, Jen! Glad you're feeling better!
Just have to share this that I saw on another site:
http://notalwaysworking.com/this-story-takes-the-cake/30764
We're taking over the Internet! Stand up and sing! (Except you, Ted.)
Has anyone else noticed on the 'Star-studded horse-dog' cake that they've managed to place the stars over the paw-prints so it looks like the stars have little terrified faces?! Like they're so scared of the monstrosity behind them that they can't hold it together.
I am actually /dying/ laughing here. LOOK AT THEM. omg.
I call dibs on bass.
Is it just me or does shaving cream cake dude look like the abominable snowman character on Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer?
hmmmmm...Hell hath no fury like a Wreckie scorned....
@Craig: nicely done....
When it comes to writing song parodies...I like that we're Sharyn 'em...but SuBee or not SuBee...that is the question...actually, that is not a question -- we've been doin' em for years...zoomom and I did the same song a couple of Halloween's ago, Sharyn's made her mark with them (one of her marks)....and we're gonna continue to do 'em...and we're gonna continue with atrocious puns, funny remarks, off the wall comments, observations, haiku's (at least I hope we are), poetry and whatever else suits our individual fancy. And sometimes we'll make people shoot coffee out their nose or groan...and sometimes not....but we're here for the humor and the fun, whatever form it takes. And if today doesn't strike your fancy or tickle your innards, come back tomorrow. And if that doesn't work, thanks for stopping by.
SuBee, thanks for the explanation. This Canuck will have to plead ignorance and google the song to learn it. I await news on the inaugural choir practice :-)
@Nancy and Barbara Anne and Sharyn -- thank you.
Why does Uncle Sam's moustache always have to come out the sides of his nose? I just don't understand...
I never comment but...
OMG I cried laughing. Well done!
Oh my lands! "here's a gingerbread soldier with his head on fire being run over by a tank" LOVE IT!! So straightforward and that's exactly what the cake is! Thanks for the hearty lol!! And all the laughs everyday!