Subjective Reasoning
October 24, 2012 Sometimes the best part of checking the Cake Wrecks email is reading the subject lines you readers come up with. After all, it's not every inbox that can boast lines like "Loose Stool or Sea Slug?" and "Two Words: Flaming Caterpillar."
Here are some more fantastic, actual examples of reader email titles from the archives. (No, seriously, I am not making these up.)
"Dogs with grad caps nailed to their skulls" - from Amy T.
(Admit it: you would open that one first, too.)
;)
And she really nailed that description on the head, huh?
"Asphyxiation Barbie: SVU" - Sarah M.
"Looks like somebody..."
[removing sunglasses]
"...took this doll's breath away."
"I was looking for Monistat at the Walmart..." - Scott F.
"Yeast ring?" I donut think that means what you think it means...
"Princess Leia's Frhog" - Colleen K.
;)
"Help me, Oinkie One Kenobi; you're my only hop."
"Madagascar Nipples Cake" - Amy E.
;)
[Insert "Tracts of land" joke here.]
"Peanut Mouth Cookie Ninja" - Amanda B.
;)
(Does the head wound mean the ninja's already been here?)
And my personal favorite:
"I don't know what it is, but it's angry and it has a guitar." - Petra R.
To be fair, it also has a pilgrim hat.
Thanks to all of today's wreckporters for continuing to keep our spam filters guessing.
Reader Comments (62)
"And a punk tribble with a guitar" bwahahaha!!!
I also thought of Calcifer. :)
If you're keeping tallies, I am strongly against yet more "thumbs up/down" websites.
hahahahahaha!!!!!! Madagascar Nipple Cake! hahahahaha!!!!!!!
best. cake. title. ever.
Thank you Amy E for sending that email, thank you.
Yay Craig! and missed you too, Haiku Joy!
How about just thumbs up? I'd be OK with that.
I so want a Threadless T with the punk tribble with a guitar.
Awesome post. Had tears in my eyes.
I think my opposition stems mostly from the fact that clicky thumbs (whether up or down) are too mindless and convenient. Very quickly, getting X many thumbs up becomes a matter of course. A comment is only REALLY good if it gets X + 5. And then X + 10. I also seem to know too many folks who feel slighted if they don't get a certain number of thumbs-up on their sites in a day.
But I am also opposed to extra credit, lime green zebra stripes, preschool graduation ceremonies, strike-on-box matches, almost all standardized exams (including SAT, ACT, and GRE), science fairs in which each participant receives an honorable mention, marketing to children, paper towels, conspicuously branded clothing, and the positively maudlin Victorian ditty "Away in a Manger." So I'm probably alien-born - I'm just waiting to hear my adoptive earth parents break the news to me.
I am giddy with delight! I haven't been able to check out Cake Wrecks this week and when I get here Haiku Joy AND Craig are here. {insert creepy stalker-like gushing here} HUZZAH!
John (thoJ) - Awesome post. I think I want that last cake on a Threadcakes T, too. Madagascar Nipple Cake just says it all. Thanks for the chuckles!
Haiku Joy-- aMEN, brother! (or sister, sorry, I don't know)
Anyone else think that last one looks like the eye of Sauron?
"To be fair, it also has a pilgrim hat." BEST. LINE. EVAH!
Why aren't more of you disturbed by those poor graduating bloody dogs? o_O I think that from now on, you should always include the original title when it's funny because that was awesome!
Good grief....I was laughing so hard at the Yeast Ring, that I wasn't even making noise. So freaking funny!!!!!!
Late to the party here, but that last one is clearly the Balrog from Bakshi's Lord of the Rings Part One. You can tell because it's wearing its iconic bunny slippers: read and be enlightened.