The REAL King Cake
August 17, 2011 In honor of the 34th anniversary of his death yesterday, I'd like to do an Elvis post. However, I realize many of our younger readers may not be familiar with The King. So listen up, whipper snappers! Picture an older, more talented, better looking, Southern Justin Bieber wearing a white, bedazzled jumpsuit.
...
Also, he may or may not be dead.
...
Maybe don't picture that part.
Right. All together now? Then let's get started!
This is Elvis:
;)
Rawr! Ffft ffft...
This...
;)
...is not Elvis. I'm thinking either Ray Liotta or Wayne Newton.
Elvis:
;)
Not Elvis:
;)
John claims this looks like Jimmy Durante. It's like I don't even know who he is anymore. (John, I mean. Jimmy I had to wiki.)
Elvis:
;)
Um...
;)
I'm going with Liza Minelli.
Elvis:
;)
Oh! Wait! I know this one!
;)
The Brawny paper towel guy!
And finally, Elvis:
;)
Annnnnd:
;)
Queen Amidala. Or maybe one of the guys from Menudo. (Thanks, John!)
No, no, I'm staying with Amidala.
Thanks to Paula H., Diana C., Connie B., and Chrissy K. who are all, collectively, nuthin' but hound dogs. And oh! The crying! ALL the TIME! Enough, already!
Ah thank you. Thankyouverramuuuch.
Update from john: The Munsters! The last one looks like the kid from The Munsters! I knew it was something with an "M" from my childhood. Thanks comment section.
Reader Comments (140)
I'm thinking the brawny towel guy cake is actually: Tom Jones/Brawny towel guy as Mr. Scott of the USS Enterprise. if you squint hard enough he looks like he's in the original Starfleet shirt. Beam Me outta here!
I thought Jocelyn Wildenstein when I saw cake #3.
I think SuBee won.
Wayne Liotta looks to be the result of someone taking the "Elvis was an extraterrestrial" theory to its logical conclusion.
Mr. Tater-Salad-and-Chex-Mix seems to be missing part of his skull; perhaps he lost it and his left ear at the same time.
Below that, Dr. Frank-N-Furter ("Love Me Tender," indeed) is either an oral cancer victim or a bleached yam.
Brawny Paper Towel Elvis has the distinction of looking more-or-less like a drawing of a healthy human being, smugly oblivious to the rain of moldy lemons that will soon descend upon him.
And poor Eddie Munster has the worst case of scoliosis I've ever seen; but if his eyes are any indication, he's in no pain.
#3 is Marilyn Manson. Anybody can see that!
I think Brawny guy is actually a young Andrew "Dice" Clay, and thats bad enough!
Is nobody else freaked out by the taxidermy blue eyes in the first cake? They just SHINE soooo.
The first cake totally looks like Benedict Cumberbatch!
Yes, that is his real name. No, I did not just look through 8 pages of google image search results. In unrelated news, if you want to compare, I highly recommend the first 8 pages of google image search results.
Cake #2 is Shia LaBeouf in Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.
Cake #5 is Jack Soo. Definitely. Jack Soo.
The first one looks like the love child of Christopher Walken and John Travolta.
To jon: Don't worry, I'm 24 and yes I think it does look like Jimmy Durante, I love his movies
I think that last one looks like Eddie Munster. lol
The one you said looks like hte brawny guy looks WAY more like Danny Zuko. Case in point (about 40 seconds in):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OtOmKaVbP_A
GAWWWWD! That second cake...he looks like a cross between Nicholas Cage and Adrian Brody! BWAHAHAHA
Forget "A Hunka Hunka Burnin' Love!"... these cakes need to be killed with fire! Someone please find a creme brulee torch... or a flame thrower.. heck, I'll settle for Emperor Palpaptine and his Evil Force Lightning!
The first one looks like a young version of John Travolta. (I'm old!)
No. 4 is defo LIberace
The eyes on the first one absolutely creep me out.
Elvis Durante totally looks like Larry Hankin! http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0359969/
The first is definitely Christopher Walkin.
The others, I have no words.
The last one looks like Dracula in his hay day!
That first one... wow. "Elvis Attacked by Coral Snake!" Weekly World News worthy! The King's turning in his grave (or is he!?) at these heinous cakes. Someone needs to tell the wreckoraters, "Don't Be Cruel..."
The Jimmy Durante one looks like Serge Gainsbourg to me (you probably never heard of him, just like I had never heard of Jimmy Durante...)
Oh, come on - the last one could totally be fat Elvis!
Are those donuts on the Brawny Guy cake???
Cake #4: I'm thinking Eddie Munster
bluefairy -
Until a few minutes ago, I had no idea who Serge Gainsbourg was, but after a little help from google, I have to agree. That cake definitely is supposed to be Serge Gainsbourg.
Nothing like Elvis!...Looks like Lisa Minelli!
The first cake is OBVIOUSLY Lou Diamond Phillips in 'La Bamba'!
Oh my sweet and fluffy Lord, that third cake looks Madame! That puppet was terrifying, much like that cake.
The Liza Minelli one could also be Cruella De Vil.
The last one is Gertrude Stein. Or at least Kathy Bates as Gertrude Stein in Midnight in Paris. Trust me.
On the Brawny cake, I'm going to guess pretzels... no, wait, waffles! Definitely waffles. Chocolate drizzled waffles.
Now that a lot of people have mentioned it, cake #1 definitely is Christopher Walken. I thought it was kinda creepy.... And I definitely do NOT see Donnie Osmond. Anywhere.
Proving that I'm waaay older than Jen, I didn't have to google/wiki anything. I'm assuming that John is just naturally gifted.
John Travolta for the first and Cher for the third.
The last cake looks like Dracula
Not Jimmy Durante...Don Knotts.... that definately looks like Don Knotts.
I think the first one is Ray Liotta and Wayne Newton's baby.
I've got two guesses for cake # 4 - #1 Tom Jones and #2 Johnny Mathis. Sorry if anyone has to Wiki them.
(first off, your captions crack me up. seriously.)
And thank you for posting those yummy pics- and I'm not talking about the cakes ;)
Cake #1: Definitely Ray Liotta, but playing the role of Dracula
Cake #2: Don Knotts in the secret original Star Trek pilot wherein he portrays Mr. Spock
Cake #3: A grand piano that has sustained extreme fire damage.
Cake #4: Could never be mistaken for anyone other than the Brawny man
Cake #5: Mulan
I thought the first cake had vampire written all over it!
I think the last one looks like Epcot.
That first one looks more like Christopher Walken than Ray Liotta or Wayne Newton
I need to show these to my mum! She'll despair of the cake decorating skills, be mesmerised by the Elvis photos - and probably never ask me for an Elvis cake!!! :D
Then again, my mum is such an Elvis fan, she might not appreciate the humour of the wrecks...
...but I'll take that risk!
I think the last one looks like Bela Lugosi in his Dracula days...
SuBee! You are a genius! I never thought of using my google goggles for cake wrecks! Awesomeness! I'm off to the archives!
I definitely see Christopher Walken in that first one!
I thought the first one sorta looked like a young Silvio Dante from The Sopranos....
For those of us in the Memphis area, thanks for insuring we are assailed with Elvis at all possible turns. 'Cause we weren't quite mired enough in Elvis week hoopla. Love the wrecks and you're totally right about the Brawny guy one. I said Brawny guy before I read your opinion.
Great post!
Is that a tie, scarf, or a coral king snake? and why???
Broken nose Spock with a priest collar?
Totally Liza.
What's with the orange slices drizzled in chocolate? That was almost nice except for those random orange slices. Almost.
The last one is definitely Bollywood actor Aamir Khan.