Friday
Mar122010
Et Tu, O-Town?
March 12, 2010 I feel I should prepare you in some way for today's Wreck.
Hm. Let's see...
Oh! I know. How about this:
Think of a place. A happy place.
A place where chocolate-dipped demon mummies can never, ever reach you - much less wrap you in their fudgy arms and squeeze the life-breath out of you.
Are you imagining that happy place? Are you there?
Ok, good.
You may now proceed.
AAAAAAUUUUGGGHHH!! THINK OF THE HAPPY PLACE!
THINK OF THE HAPPY PLACE!!!
Ahem.
Yes, it IS cake.
Forty six pounds of cake, to be precise, and fifty five pounds of chocolate ganache. It's a testament to the baker's skill that I could never get within arm's reach of this thing, for fear of it suddenly coming to life like in Night at the Museum.
Still, you've got to appreciate the humor of where they chose to start cutting:
"Hey, girl, you have one sweet piece of...[noticing onlookers]...uh...shoulder blade."Thanks to Wreckporter Jessica Y., who featured it here in her article for Orlando Weekly, and also to Paul J., the baker/sculptor, who's been an awfully good sport about all this.
In fact, you can check out progress shots of Paul sculpting the demon mummy (warning: a live model was used, & she's nekkid!) at his FB album here.
Reader Comments (188)
Aww, Bog Man finally found love!
The first cake I think will give me nightmares!
Love the knife in the back photo on the FB page. Yeah, that about sums it up.
AAAAAARGH!!! That will haunt my dreams tonight...
Yep. No happy place is going to quell the nightmares I am sure to have.
That is so disturbing I fear that the image may never leave my head!
I think that's where they started cutting, too, in that story/ movie about a plane crash, Alive...
Why? Whhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy? Why?
Zoinks! That is one hideous cake... but fascinating at the same time.
“Y’know,” said the artist to himself, “the only way I could possibly make this poo-brown concoction of mine any more freakish is if I were to imply by the model’s pose…that she’s constipated. Yep, that’ll do ‘er!”
^..^
oh.my.gracious. That is one disturbing cake!
If you hadn't shown the proof that it was cake, I was getting ready to accuse you of having manipulated some photography of the ruins of Pompeii. Wow. What a thing. So far, you seemed to have left most of your followers speechless with that one! Kathleen
Um, wow? There's something wrong about this, but I just don't have the words for it.
OMG-she/he/it looks like it is squatting to well...poop.
Bev
Definitely well-made.
I just don't know why it was made.
I'm having trouble imagining what sort of event calls for a cake like this. Is there a Pompeii Appreciation Society of Cannibals?
AaaaaHH!!! Weren't those things on a video game, like Silent Hill or Zelda? I'm sure I've seen something like that in a game my husband's played...then proceeded to have nightmares. {shudder}
By the way, you still have till Sunday to enter to win a free Box of Awesome. It's like Woot's Bag of Crap, but everything inside will be awesome. :)
Wow just Wow.
Rashelle
I like that he let the model have first crack at herself :)
doesn't this remind anyone of what happend when mt. vesuvius errupted?
I have no words. I keep trying to think of something witty or sarcastic but I just can't think because I just cannot stop staring!
It's just amazing that they got it to balance. The chocolate may not be the prettiest color, but the form of it is phenomenal!
Mmmm....gluteus maximus.
Just another line item in the laundry list of why cakes shouldn't be made in human form! At least it wasn't red velvet cake..
Wow...
There are TRULY no words....
That is seriously disturbing!
It looks like a monster from the popular video game series, "the legend of zelda". This specific one is called a "ReDead":
http://www.zeldadungeon.net/Zelda05/Walkthrough/03/ReDead2.png
Why did they start with eating the -erm- bottom- of the cake?
That thing did not look appetizing at all.
~Brandy M.
OH NO! THAT'S GROSS!!!
Wow. All I can say is Wow. That is uber creepy.
How is that cake supported? It sure looks like it should topple over at any second.
::rocking:: I'm ok.....I'm ok.....the horrible cake lady will not come out from under the bed and eat me in revenge....::sob::
I just can't get over this creepy Donner Party feeling.... *shiver*
As much as love to eat cake, I think I might pass if I were at that event. :(
My kids say, "Wow. That's CREEPY!"
I.. uhm... Well. Hrmmm....
Never expected to see a bondage cake here.
Isn't that the same position one gets into when camping/hiking and answering nature's call?
at first glance I thought it was a bloody body from Hellraiser :P
And here my first thought was Degas' bronze ballerinas..you live in a curious world, friend.
B.Marshall
Creepy yes, but amazing what some people can sculpt out of cake!
apparently this cake was made live at the event....the attendees seemed to be real impressed by the cake & the artist....
I think I am going to have a nightmare....
Oh my. It reminds me of Bog Man in the British Museum. I think the photos of the cake cut open are more disturbing in a way. If I show this to my 14-year-old son, he's going to want something like it for his birthday, I just know it.
Again, I'll say it: I can't believe the unending and increasingly bizarre array of cakes you find for this site.
"Solent-Brown-is-PEOPLE"
For once I disagree. I see an AMAZING work of art.
There is no place happy enough to allow me to block that from my brain.
Thank you for setting up the happy place ahead of time, because I ran screaming into it after seeing that. Reminds me of the scene in James Bond when Strawberry Fields was covered in oil. I shudder.
It reminds me of the Pompeii victims. o_O
It's an impressive technical achievement, no doubt about it -- but that doesn't stop it from being just a tad creepy.
I don't know, I think it's a lovely sculpture. But the fact that it's made out of cake is a bit unsettling.
Is the artist making some commentary about how humans are just eaten away at piece by piece until there's nothing but a smear of icing left on the cake board of life? And instead of leaving a legacy, as with stone statues of old, our generation of humanity is to leave behind nothing but a mess to clean up after and a sugary stomach-ache for those that follow? Suddenly I'm very sad...
I might have been tempted to have started by cutting off the head. Isn't that how you "kill" a demon?
wv: emophote. One who is afraid of photos like the wreck featured here.
omg. It reminds me of the mummy-zombies from Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. O_o I remember being terrified of those when I was a kid watching my little brother play. The little scream as you get frozen in spot, watching helplessly as it saunters towards you, then climbs on your back and begins draining your life... D: Yeah, it still scares me 15 years later!
*happy place, happy place, sun song, sun song, petrify the mummy-zombies with the ocarina...*