Wreck and Roll
December 1, 2010 Ever thought it was IMPOSSIBLE to have all of your favorite 80s hits in one place? That there was simply NO WAY to hear all of the hottest artists together in one jam-packed jam session? That you could ever only enjoy that much music in some magical world, where thousands of songs could easily fit on a lightweight portable device? Well, you're right. (That would be CRAZY.) So until then, we're offering you the musical deal of a lifetime!!
That's right, with the "Wreckin' Rock Power Mix," you'll never miss a beat. This colossal power-collection comes delivered to your doorstep in 6 dominating power-boxes of 23 LPs or 39 power cassette tapes. That's 846 power-hits!
We'll include the tastiest of licks, like:
"I'm writing on sunshine, whoa-oh! I'm writing on sunshine, whoa-oh! And I bet it tastes good! HeH! Alright now!"
"We are strong! No one can tell us pink's wrong!"
"Ooh, what a feeling! When you're dancing on the... seriously, did you notice that this cake was written on upside-down? Really... look at it again."
"Lost in the bakery, too pink to hide. I'll cause a toothache right when you take a bite.Do do dooo do do doo do do doo do do doo do dooo dooooooo."
"She blinded me with science (SCIENCE!) and failed me in the bakery."
"Sometimes I feel I've got to uhn uhn run away. I've got to uhn uhn get away from all the cupcake cakes you sell to me..."
"Crack that whip!"
...and more! You'll never find a more rocktastic compilation of all of the best artists from yesterday and beyond. And if you call now, we'll also include a FREE bonus 8-track cassette of all of the best songs from the 70s! These songs will blast your earholes into another sound dimension!!
"Lean on me... when you're not strong, and I'll be your friend. I'll help you caaarry severaltiersofcakeandfrosting. Andpossiblysomeprincessflotsam!"
"I'll stop the world and melt this food. You've seen the Cake Wrecks, and they're getting better all the time."
"I remember when rock was young. Me and Suzy had so much... DEAR GOD, what IS that thing!?? AAAAAAAgggGHGHH! EEeeeAAAAGHHH!!"
Other artists include Emily W., Cassandra B., and Becky W. in the hot 80s trio "The Wreckinettes." Bonus tracks by Susan A., Megan P., Sarah A., and Annie H. from the popular ballad band "Susan and The Wreckies." And of course, no compilation album would be complete without the greatest hits of top rocker hair band, "Possum Wreck Slashers," with vocal styling from Jessica E., Amanda H., and Rachel C. Rock on!!
Reader Comments (94)
I thought the "Let's Get Physical" cake was a combination Olivia Newton John plus a reference to Devo? In the song "Whip It" they say, "Crack that whip!"
Ok so I'm laying here with ice on my head because of a migraine, feeling like I had to do something....so I see cakewrecks on my newsfeed. Laughing so hard at your captions and the pink THING doesn't help migraine pain, but it sure helped my mood!
Thanks for sharing your wrecks peeps, for one that lacks the crafty gene, it makes me feel not so alone in this talented world
"Crocodile Rock" an 80's song? Sorry - 1972.
Beth,
Read the post.
I would love to have some really witty observation to make about these cakes. Unfortunately, my brain is still going, "Um. . . uh. . . but. . . wha. . ." I think it's scary that while I did notice "Dady" on the first cake, I totally missed "brithday" & had to go look again. Is my brain (brian?) THAT immune to misspellings that now it thinks they are correct?
Even though google tells me it was recorded in the 60s, the first thing I thought of with the melted cake was "MacArthur Park."
I love the TPB quote you snuck in on that last one...
Should have been with yesterday's blog though. Oh well, Princess Bride is Princess Bride, no matter which way you slice it!
wv: ariarly - I had to get up ariarly this morning...
LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this post! 80's music and some good laughs all rolled together!
LOL. And it's weird, right when I scrolled down to the "Crocodile Rock" cake, the song came on! Whoaaaaa. Anyway, fantabulous post as usual.
Brithday and Dady have got to be wrong. But if wreckeratin's wrong, I don't wanna be right!
And is that CHEESE in that last one?? A crocodile with sickly green fosting and cheese?
Well, any, I'm all set for karaoke tomorrow night!
Cloudy
Wonderful, brilliant post! I think the "Get Physical" cake should make friends with the "No Sexual Harassment" cake
Oh wow your comments just make it all that much better. I am awaiting the musical version to be posted to youtube complete with cell phone interruption ;)
Those are scary. What on earth does the lips one say?
Thanks for the stroll down memory lane!
'Tainted love' - ideal solution for groups where some people want less icing on the cupcake
'crocodile' - are those teeth made with corn chips?
I love the random Princess Bride quotes. :)
Luckily the visual distraction in the background of the 1st cake helps to hide all of the spelling errors....Happye Brithday Dady. Props to gaudy behind the scenes camouflage! ;o)
Time to break out my Veggie Tales CDs- "Bob and Larry Sing the 70's" and "Bob and Larry Sing the 80's" most of these songs are there.
Now where did I put my leg warmers and hair crimper? Oh, there they are, right under my poster of Ricky Schroeder.
This was too cool!
WV: crool. What wreckerators say on Elvis cakes- "Don't be Crool"
My favorite part of the post: The "unh unh" in Run Away :)
Uh, I mean to say that I love the whole post, but that the "unh unh" is particularly funny.
Does anyone know what the "tainted love" CCC says? All I can see is "Muat"
THIS was one of your very best posts ever!!
To the pain!
Military flotsam on pink cake-that makes real sense *headesk*
That gator cake. Oh, my. Thank y'all for my big laugh today, as always!
But if we order, do we get a set of Ginsu knives, as well?
I was laughing at the "crocodile rock" cake, and my 2 year old son came over, pointed, and shouted, "that's scary!" He then proceeded to look at the rest of the pictures and laugh at each one. I think he's a future wreckporter in the making!
~Jess from NM
so Im not just thinking about this particular post because as wrecks go, these arent the worst. But, I look at this site and think two things.
First is, who actually thought that their cakes looked good enough to sell?!?!?!
Second, who actually spends money on cakes that look like these!?!?!?
I am a pastry chef, so i LOVE this site, but I also am just dumbfounded that there are just terrible decorators out there and that people buy them (and I dont mean the people on this website that bought them BECAUSE they looked funny!)
I just dont get it!
I see 'Myatt' on the 'Tainted Love' Cake. Once you see it, you'll realize that that makes no sense either.
The skull and crossbones is definitely concerning, though...
Macarthur Park doesn't work for the melting cake because the "sweet, green icing" is chocolate. It also looks like someone left it in a hot car, not out in the rain.
wv: gredrog. Kind of like 'redrum', only gredrog is gordreg spelled backwards.
It's bad that I looked at this update and thought, "Oh, I know an actor that would appreciate this!"
...
Oy.
Ohhhh those hilarious wreckerators are at it again. Brithday and dady? aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. Not to mention my favorite song "Tainted Love" is now stuck in my head. So much to blame the wreckerators for here lol.
A-Ha! U2 can have a wrecked cake! Which reaction do you want when you see your wrecked cake: tears or fears? These were clearly created by simple minds and anyone could see with their naked eyes that these are wrecks. Some people clearly don't understand modern English, or they would not misspell words like that! Some of that frosting looks like something left behind by a flock of seagulls, like all you have to do is squeeze out the frosting. I know mostly women decorate cakes, but I think there were some men at work here, too. (If they were men without hats, I hope they wore hair nets.) I wonder what the cure for this madness is. Maybe the decorators need more REM sleep. I think I'll have a taco instead.
The post was great, but I'd put them in a new order.
Okay, I'm done.
best back story yet!!!!
Oh! [wiping tears of laughter from eyes] Where to start? Kudos on today's blog. The lyrics parodies are as brilliant as the pairing of songs & wrecks.
You forgot one reference for that first cake... "Hey litle grl, is yor dady home... etc. ohOhohoOH, I'm on fire..."
Geesh.
Out of all the postings of Cake Wrecks on your site, these made me laugh out loud! Thank you for the trip down memory lane! The captions were priceless!!
Uh.... the gator cake looks like guac with chips.
About the war cake -
In the 60s and 70s, a company named Avalon Hill produced wargames that used cardboard pieces and paper maps with hexagons. During this entire time the colors for the sides were those exact shades - described as "Baby Blue" and "Frou Frou Pink".
Its hard to get into the US versus Nazis at the Battle of the Bulge or Lee versus Meade at Gettysburg with those colors.
Well maybe the wreckerators are forced, much like yours truly, to listen to horrible 80s music while making cakes all day (I hear all the songs you have referenced on a regular basis at work).
So far I have not incorporated the songs into any cakes but now you have given me something to think about...
HILARIOUS! What is that pink furry monster about?
see my blog: nikkiscakery.blogspot.com
This has got to be my favorite entry on the site.
So the upside gymnast on the balance beam totally had me humming U2. She moves in mystrious ways.
The subtle Princess Bride quote was a nice touch.
Oh my Lord - are the alligator's teeth made from TACO CHIPS?!?! The worst yet.
However, this was a great entry (I particularly loved the Tainted Love cake).
Great job guys! You've just combined 3 of my favorite things: The Princess Bride, 80's music, and cakewrecks humor!!
Now I have to find the picture from my 23rd birthday that exemplifies "Lean on Me." I came up for Thanksgiving and the day before, my Dad picked me up to take me for a flu shot. While filling out the paperwork for me and my brother, he asked the date. "November 26." "And your birthdate?" "November 26, 1980." Both he and my brother got panicked looks on their faces, my brother left to run an errand and I got whisked away to see a movie with Dad and my fiance just because Dad was in the mood to watch one before Thanksgiving. I got home to find my mom had made a German chocolate cake--my favorite. I was uber-excited until the middle of the song, when the cake split down the middle, candles-still-lit and fell to either side. We propped it up with spatulas and a copy of the David O. Mckay biography until it was done and my mom has ever since left the cake-baking to my sister-in-law or a baker.