Thursday
Jun042009
Weird Wedding Cakes
June 4, 2009 You could argue that some of these aren't exactly Wrecks, but they're just too "good" not to share.
Don't you hate it when the cake eavesdrops, Anne L.?
The alien armada, coming in for a landing.
Inmagine is a stock photo site, so here's hoping this is a joke, Emily S. Or maybe an ad for Big Love? (Gorgeous cake, though, huh?)
I can forgive many things, Dawn M., but forgetting to ice the cake is not one of them.
And here's another classic, found by Lynna at World's Ugliest Wedding Cakes, I believe:
Wow. Remember when Beanie Babies were such a great investment, because their value could only increase? Kind of like our houses four years ago? (Oh, SNAP, economy.) Yeah. Those were good times.
Tune in tomorrow for part two, because oh yes, there are more.
Reader Comments (143)
The bee-hive cake would have been perfect if it had only had the most obvious frosting: honey glaze!
My 3 year old was on my lap when I opened the site and promptly said about the first picture, "Look! It's a caterpillar!"
I don't know if you've ever seen tackyweddings.com but this one ties right in with today's post.
http://tackyweddings.com/2008/12/25/ultra-tacky-backyard-wedding-and-the-worst-wedding-cake-ever-made/
Frill-necked lizard cake!
When threatened with marriage, turns
crimson and attacks!
Those are some..interesting cakes there!
~Amy B.
The groom on the polygamy cake does have a pretty big, uh, top hat. Maybe that's part of the draw for those stupid little icing women...
That beehive cake gives me the heebie jeebies. If it has insects burying into it, real or no, I don't want it...
The first one reminds me of some kind of worm coming up out of the table.
Bride to Baker:
"I want one of those topsy turvy cakes, but turv it all to one side. You know, sort of like a half eaten croissant."
The red fleet of cakes totally cracks me up. Can you imagine walking into a reception and seeing that? I think I'd take my fruit salad and hide under my table.
I kind of like the bee hive cake though. And is it really not iced, or did they ice it in brown? I couldn't really tell on my screen. However, I think it would be more appropriate for a child's party than a wedding. Points for creativity though.
I wish I'da thought of the icing-less cake when we got married. Neither of us like icing. We scraped it off before we fed each other. There is never icing on cakes I bake and when I store buy them, we scrape it off!
Different strokes for different folks!
These are like good cakes that took a left at Albuquergue. They just didn't quite make it.
The first one looks like an elephant snout coming up from under the table.
So, did they have the Beanie Baby bear and match the cake to it, or did they dye the bear to match the cake? Maybe the bear just got in the way of the unfortunate air brushing. TAKE COVER!!!
WV - trusnoup: A very honest private investigator.
Okay I found the wedding site where those red cake monstrosities came from. Here it is:
http://tackyweddings.com/2009/01/14/super-ugly-wedding-complete-with-santa-wedding-dress/
Is it weird that I actually like the beanie baby cake? :( I'm a sad, sad person.
The top wedding cake looks like it was assembled with some skill... which makes me wonder why they used that skill to craft a replica of the sand worms from Dune...
Not convinced that the polygamist cake is a wreck simply because there are three wives. Being polyamorous is no worse than being monogamous, as long as everyone's on board with the situation.
The first squinty one reminds me of a role of sushi or something cause of the middle of the top layer. Ick.
That polygamy cake with three brides...... oh no. They did not go there.
I actual eally like the last cake. The colors are blended well, it's nice and neat. Not wrecky at all to me. =)
Hey, I had to do a triple take on the beehive cake... it IS frosted. Pure genius. It looks like it was frosted and then dusted. If no frosting, wouldn't you see the line between one cake and the next? And the bottom is kinda smeared.
I really think that the beehive cake is frosted and then made to look brown...
That alien ensemble is THE ugliest thing I have ever seen! I would choose the florescent number over that monstrosity any day of the week!
You don't serve slices of that red cake. You just pick up individual tiers and toss them like Frisbees to each table.
The Beanie Cake hurts my eyes! It really does! What in the world? I'd love to hear the story behind it though.
About that second cake..... um, yeah.... You think that there was some "not being outdone by the jones" going on?
WV Mented, "I mented the cake to lean that way"
From looking more closely at the photo of the beehive cake, I would say that it IS frosted and then "dusted" with something like finely crushed graham crackers..which might taste pretty good. However, it definitely would have been prettier with some flowers and larger, less realistic bees - and no butterflies!
There are no words for the Armada. Good Lord!
"Also, RED ICING!? I have never tasted any that was not bitter, even when made with "no-taste" red food coloring."
You just reminded me of my great-grandma's birthday cake yearrrssss (17? 18?)ago. We still talk about how awful that red icing was!
The beehive cake IS iced, but is also dusted with powdered chocolate. I have seen one before. But, as said before, the bees need to be bigger.
The red one.... What the hell were they thinking!?!
omg! that first cake is crazy!!! how is it not falling over?!?!?!
I like the beehive cake (and if you look at the base you can tell that it is frosted, peeps), but all I can think when I see the "Big Love Cake" is that I don't remember Ginnifer Goodwin being bald.
I would love that beehive cake if it had a drizzle of white frosting over each of the rounded edges to look a little more appealing.and to look like it didn't taste so dry!
Cake without ANY icing = no cake I am partaking in!
ahh! I'm on Cake Wrecks! :D
The "alien armada" cake display cracks me up. When I first saw it, it immediately reminded me of the plate spinners at the circus - complete with Sabre Dance playing in the background.
Yaaaaah dit dit dit dit dit dit dit dit....Yaaaaah dit dit dit dit dit dit dit dit...
LOL!
I've seen a couple of cakes around here that resemble the alien armada. It's a Samoan tradition that you have as many layers for how old the bride is. Then you give out a layer each to the most respected people in the room...but everyone else just gets a slice.
...but it still looks awful.
That first cake looks like an obese tapeworm all prettied up and powdered for its wedding day. It's the precious little pink rose on top that gives it away. Chibi Shai Hulud is just getting into position to devour some poor bastard with that pastel pink mouth.
@ Laurie 10:30 - We had a styrofoam cake at our wedding because the caterer said they could ONLY do fruitcake ONLY with royal icing. This was in 1984 when wedding cake technology was presumably in the Dark Ages. My fiance and I hated those kind of cakes, so, intimidated by a imperious caterer, we had to acccept a styrofoam cake. For actual consumption purposes, we had a dessert table that was blessedly free of styrofoam, royal icing and fruitcake.
Well the beehive cake is rather clever but MY EYES!! OH MY EYES!! the dayglo tiedye cake!! X_X
Polygamy cake = WHAT
Tippy cake...was that on purpose? Because if so, good job on the defying gravity part. If not, way to make it look like a lovely blue-ribbon wrapped...elephant trunk. Yeah.
I am t-minus 3 months to my own wedding and it occurred to me the other day that OH my gosh my own cake could be a wreck!! 0_0 EEeyikes. "I thought wrecks only happened to other people, not me!!" LOL, that should be a slogan on one of your shirts, Jen.
Wow - 23 cakes at one wedding. I shudder to think how ridiculous the rest of the wedding was. I agree the beehive cake is frosted - in beehive-colored frosting. The Beanie Baby cake is awesome, even if it is nasty fondant. If you go to Inmagine, you'll see some of the keywords for that photo are traditional, customs, nobody, four, several, and a few.
@ Nathan:
I like the way you think (because you think like I do)! >^~-^<
Your mentioning the plate spinners/circus theme actually triggered an image of something in my own mind in a very similar vein!
The first thing I "saw" here was a wildly innovative carnival ride!
(Yes--bring on the Sabre Dance; it's perfect!)
Just imagine...
The riders not only get a dizzying thrill from spinning clockwise AND counterclockwise (and uuup, and dowwwnn) inside the giant cake "layers," but at the end of the ride, they get to EAT the ride.
Then they throw it up.
What more could one ask for in a cake/ride/wedding combo?
eeek!! Scary scary stuff!!
Wow, I needed to get out my sunglasses to be able to focus on that beanie baby cake. It hurts!
The "uniced" cake actually looks like it was iced and then covered in Nilla wafer cookie or graham cracker crumbs.
I'm guessing the giant red octopus-spaceship cake is from a Chinese wedding? Isn't red a typical wedding color in their culture (color of good luck or joy or something like that).
That psychadelic beanie babies cake burns the retina. Seriously.
Also, that first wedding cake is cool. Not one I'd order, but rad nonetheless.
LOL! My almost 4 yr old daughter loved the last cake! She said she wanted it for her birthday.
The alien armada cake is featured at this website:
http://www.geocities.com/ghettofabwedding/
I love the caption they put on the picture. The mothership has landed indeed! I wonder what they did with the leftover cake.
It's a Christmas-themed wedding as you can plainly see, judging by the bride's Mrs. Claus dress, the color scheme, and the Christmas trees and wreaths.
I really like the beehive cake!
that last one is interesting, but for a wedding cake, I don't think so.
http://www.kitchenkapers.com/nordicware-beehive-pan.html
voila. Beehive.
the last one was just wrong in so many different levels. hilarious! but wrong.
Oh my god, the Alien Armada cake! roflmao!