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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
May012009

Why Beat a Dead Horse...

When you can eat one?


Am I right, Christin C.?

What's that? Ah, Robyn N. wants me to up the ante! Ok, how about a horse/cow mash-up cupcake cake?

No matter where you go, that eye will be watching - aaaallllways waaatching....
Check out the icing depth, too; most impressive.

Oh, but look! We have another contender entering the ring!
That thar's a mighty small pho-to for such a gee-gantic Wreck, Brio. Yeehaw! This buckaroo may only work out his front legs, but them fillies shore don't complain. (This concludes my attempt at a Texas drawl. Y'all.)

Allison's trying to get ahead (get it? A head?) with this sporty specimen:


Heh. That startled expression makes him look like he just inhaled that baseball Hoover-style.

But the undisputed winner has to be this one from Celeritas:

"Hey mister, why the long face?"

Ahahahah!

Next time I'll tell ya the one about the bartender and the grasshopper.


You would think that every horse head cake would come served on a pillow, though, wouldn't you?

Oh, wait - looks like I spoke too soon:


Ewww. I'm all for movie references, Erin M., but that's definitely an offer I can refuse.

NOTE: If this post looks familiar, there's a reason for that. And if it doesn't, that means you don't check CW first thing every morning, and should be ashamed of yourself. Hmph. Call yourself a Wreckie, do you? Where's your sense of Wrecky loyalty? Where's your pride? Where's the frickin' remote? (Seriously, I lost it. Have you seen it?)

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Reader Comments (141)

The last one was very well executed......Pa Rum Pum! LOL

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJudy

I have no words.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBecs

That last one is pretty nice otherwise. The subject matter is just off.

The fugly crossovers, myself included, will love this post!

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFhtrkstr101

you have to admit....that last one is done quite well...aside from the blood and the tongue hanging out. but really. it actually looks like a horse. eek.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWakeGrace

Is it me, or does the first one kind of resemble Alf?

http://leastlikelytoblog.wordpress.com/

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNYCGirl

That fist one looks like Charlie Horse from the Lamb Chop series. Now THAT'S disturbing!

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAlexandra

That second to last one looks like a brown chili pepper with a freckle.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRyan

er...the first cake looks like an horrible genetic experiment involving a pig, a horse and http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/search?q=weight+watchers" REL="nofollow">Hungry that went unspeakably awry.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Courteous Chihuahua

And the first one looks like he was really "pooped out" Pah Rum Pum!!!! again....LOL

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJudy

Oh my god, the last cake is so messed up. . . I think I puked in my mouth a little.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAleesuhn_Muhree

All of these cakes look terrible!

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

I am so impressed that they include a tongue in the Godfather horse cake!!!

Millie x

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMs.Logica

That last one is actually pretty nice...except for the horrifying fact that it is a bloody, decapitated head.

What is wrong with people?

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLioness

In light of the recent tragedy in South Florida, this is kind of sad.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBrian

Do you think the person receiving the Godfather cake got the subtle hint the cake giver was going for?

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJuju

Ugh, Jen! The timing on these is awful given the horrible horse die-off in Florida this week.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

yeah decapitated horses.

Maybe someone works for a pharmaceutical campony and that's the left over from some animal testing

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMella

Uh, I know this is a family site but isn't the third horse down a little too... uhm anatomically drawn? Is it just me?

Also the baseball one... ok I'm just gonna say it, it looks like he has a ball gag in his mouth.

These cakes are disturbing.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterInner Moppet

The long face one, if decorated with green frosting instead, could make an awesome jalepeno pepper...

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKrismisstree

Yeah, I'd love the last one, if it weren't for the blood and all.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLaura Dotson-Thomson

Wow. Those were.....um.....interesting. The last one was pretty artistic. But I'm not sure I want to cut into it - or wake up next to it! =)

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterbigSIS

haha, love it, even if they are wrecks it reminds me of every birthday I ever had.

http://coloredcuttinghorses.blogspot.com/" REL="nofollow">Colored Cutting Horses

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCCH

The last one would make a great divorce cake. To send to your ex.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSabra

Hahahaha! That last one was pretty awesome :)

I can still feel that weird ones eyes on me... they really ARE watching me always! :|

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBilby P. Dalgyte

Long face looks like a jalapeno.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterElena

The first one reeeeaaallly makes me want to go up in my parents' attic and see if i can find my Play-Doh Barber Shop.

On the second one, obviously there was simply a miscommunication: the buyer said "I really want detail on the eye of the horse" but the wreckerator accidentaly jotted down "detailed Eye of Horus".

Um... is it just me but does the third one look like it is... a little "buxom", but the top of the "leg" in the back looks like a... obviously this horse is on too many steroids.

I'm going to refrain from commenting on the fourth. Too. Many. Naughty. Thoughts.

I thought the fifth was Joe Camel.

And finally the Godfather Horse... that's just freakin' badass. Tongue and all- bra-VO decorator!!

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMaria

well, besides being creepy, that last one wasn't too badly done. But is definitely creepy.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJen

I was thinking the same as a couple others...the first one looks like Alf! The second to last one looks more like an anteater than a horse though. I'm pretty sure I never want to see another horse cake as long as I live.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterZ's Wife

Hey!! That one with the baseball is from that kid's book, "The Horse That Played Center Field" - I'm sure of it!! {blush} I'm so happy I'm not the only nerd who loved that book. (Unless I'm wrong and it's a reference to something else. In that case... I, er, didn't love that book AT ALL...)

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRedheaded Wonder

How do you even put that much icing on a set of cupcakes??? That's like a 2inch depth on the cow cake!

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterI Love Baby Quilts!

On the first cake, I'd have to say the best part is that his pink little tongue is sticking out. Cake #2 looks like it was created by Napoleon Dynamite; was the decorator Napoleon? Just curious.

These cakes are horrific.

Oh yeah, and I Have to mention...that "long face" reference is not a horse, but it is, in fact, an ant eater. I'm sure of it.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDangGina

The first horse looks like he has canned cafeteria spaghetti as a mane and tail. Tomato sauce and chocolate frosting - YUM!

Mister Long Face horse looks like the rest of his face might be submerged in a lake of milk. He would be my bet to win by a nose!

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterspineyaardvark

My daughter would be traumatized by this topic! Must cover her eyes if she comes near.

Shudder

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMarni

I thought the "jalapeno" one was a tapir...

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTornadoBaby

WHY would a horse be eating a baseball is only one of my questions???

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHeathahLee

#5 is what happens when an facehugger get hold of a horse and impregnates it. Can't you just see those ginormous metal teeth coming out of that one?

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKashmir

My Godfather references need some reworking....

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMarieA

the gelding bus from FOTHD should be arriving for all of them except the last one.

As Judy said..it is "very well executed"

wv chmen..."men, chmen, who needs 'em". (me when something in the house breaks that's who>)

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHyena Overlord

Re: poor timing - take another post and sub it in, then run this one again a few weeks later, with an added note.

The Wrecks are worth discussing, just maybe not right now.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRana

hmmm is it just me or does the second-last resemble an anteater?

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdasunbekannte

All those CCC horse legs made me think of art class in elementary school.

I am amused by all the ALF comments because Wilton released an ALF pan, complete with plastic face plate, in 1988. (And even nerdier, I own one.)

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteroddharmonic

The long face "Happy Birthday, Patty" one looks to me very much like Brian Froud's illustration of a kelpie ... a kelpie being a shape-shifting water spirit that appears as horse and drowns those who try to ride it.

April 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

yay the horses are back! I posted the link to a few friends the first time around and they were all 'hey there arent any horses there'

May 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

Oh my gosh, that last one is incredibly disturbing. What's really sad is that it's actually a well done horse head - if only that's all it was.

May 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTristan's Mom

Yeah I check first thing I the morning every morning,so I remember.

Weird, though, Who eats these things? Tell me that much, and the world's problems are solved!

May 1, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterlaura

the second to last one looks like something from the dark crystal

May 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCupcakeKitten

Cake Wrecks is one of my go to sites every morning so I was a bit veklempt when I saw this post. A few seconds later, my brain kicked into gear and I got it.

Just in time for the Kentucky Derby!

May 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKashmir

Hey, since the Kentucky Derby is this weekend the timing of this post seems even more apropos than before. I think. :O)

May 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDorci Harris

I think my favorite is the baseball one. A wreck, and so funny at the same time! "What? I thought this was a giant sugar cube!"

The second one is just horrifying. Were it not for the eyelashes, I'd swear an empty socket was staring back at me. The last one is very well done......just, not something I would serve unless it was for Halloween.

May 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCalantha

Just in time for Derby! (Happy Oaks Day!)

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