Romance is Dead
March 26, 2009 Look, I don't want to come across as some non-happening, behind-the-times, totally square fuss pot*, but...
Wassup with all the undead wedding cakes?
Creepy-crawly bugs and tongue-kissing skeletons, oh my!
You'd think you'd only see something like this for a Halloween wedding - if ever - but zombie mania is infecting the masses, and like a gnawed off limb, it sure ain't pretty.
Ok, so that was a massive understatement. Bleeeech.
You don't need fancy tier cakes to pull off a "deadly" wedding theme, though. And if you can't afford the tongue-kissing skeleton topper, well hey, that's just what the good Lord invented edible photo paper for!
Yes, I am cheating a little here; this is actually just the groom's cake, not the wedding cake.
This is the wedding cake:
As if the toe tags, "Til Death" inscription and creepy "last embrace" foot positioning weren't enough, I think that's supposed to be ashes sprinkled down the sides. Perhaps this is the happy couples' way of telling their families they prefer cremation?
Guys, I'm telling you, if you want to gross your guests out do it the old fashioned way: by ordering a fruit filling and letting it sit out too long:
Voila! Bleeding cake!
Kathy T., Christine K., Anony M., and Manny & Jennifer S., thanks for the killer finds.
Alright, guys, you tell me: am I coming down too hard on undead wedding cakes? Have you seen a zombie/skeleton/vampire one done well? Then send it to me at Sunday Sweets [at] Cake Wrecks [dot] com, and maybe I'll feature it this Sunday.
*Particularly since I already did such a good job of that last Thursday.
UPDATE: To all the complainers in the comments: guys, lighten up. You really think I'm hating on goths because I think these cakes are Wrecks? Gimme a break! Wait'll you see this Sunday's selections, and *then* tell me I'm a goth-hater, ok? I'll show you how the undead look should be done.
Related Wreckage: Spooktacular Wedding Cakes
Reader Comments (169)
Big fan of the halloweenish cakes...not sure about the one with a tag on the toe!
http://dailygifblog.com/" REL="nofollow">http://dailygifblog.com/
Ok, I agree those are kinda creepy, but the first one reminds me more of http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calaca" REL="nofollow">calacas than zombie skeletons.
SIIIIIIICK! I really NEVER want to think of my husband and me under a sheet together - dead of course.
uhhh ohhh.
I think I need a bucket! That was so GROSS! The kissing skelliton cake is SO TACKY! EW! I don't know why but it made me imagine the bride attending the reception in her pajama pants and crocs.
Ew.
These are pretty darn wrecky, but Ace of Cakes (Charm City Cakes) has featured a bunch of gruesome cakes that are actually kinda cute. Is cute the right word?
Okay, I think that first one is actually kinda cute(well, the bugs are gross, but the rest is okay), but those other cakes are HORRENDOUS!!!! Yuck yuck yuck!!!!
WV: cacksa - the sound I made when I saw that rotting cake
I personally would love to have one of the Nightmare Before Christmas wedding cakes that I see everywhere but then again I'm the weird one in my family.
These cakes give me the shivers. All of them are fairly disgusting, but the eyeballs-as-decoration and the toe tag picture are especially disturbing.
Do you think the grooms dressed as Death and the brides as Morticia?
Yeah, I think you may be coming down too hard. The first two are very well done from a technical stand point. Not 'wrecky' at all. If not liking the subject matter is the important part a lot of the Precious Moments style baby dragon cakes that have been shown on Sunday Sweets posts are wrecks from my point of view. Way too cutesy. I'd love a zombie cake at my wedding personally. Not all of us are into the virginal white cherubs and doves wedding look.
- Cat
I completely agree with you about these horrendous and ugly cakes!
Macabre cakes....ick.
Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
I think you're right on, Jen.
I think that Tim Burton has brain-washed a whole generation. But hey, whatever floats your undead boat!
I love the unintentionally bleeding cake.
As for the others, eh....pretty accurate depiction of marriage if you ask me.
I know there's so much to be appalled by with these cakes, but I just can't get past the concept of skeletons with tongues-- that's not how decomposition works, dangit!
Word verification-- fledee: What I did when I saw the cake at the reception...
Absolutely vile and disgusting! The eyeballs on the one cake would have caused me to lose my $85-a-serving dinner!
Personally, I'd never go that route.
I saw one that wasn't too bad on Amazing Wedding Cakes once... but still... would never go that route.
Hope this link works, http://www.cakealchemy.com/option,com_picaweb.html?option=com_picaweb&albumid=5264299648475649457&photoid=5264299661011235810
Too weird. Rotting food is gross and nauseating in real life. Why would anyone deliberately recreate that look for a cake??
Oh yes, I think all things holy should be taken out of marriage. Things like love, vows, etc. etc. are just soooooo last century. After all it's just a piece of paper right? In fact lets all pledge allegiance to satan rather than vowing before God. That would be sooooo much more fun....ooooohhh and "trendy" (jazz hands!) ........NOT!!!!!
Wedding cakes for the necrophiliac? Ew.
creepy, they're creepy.
i'm not one to EVER shy away from cake. but i don't think i could stomach those. :/
Mercy. I know zombies are in vogue nowadays, but this is a little much. You see, zombies do not = appetizing! Even if all of these cakes are for goths, still...unappetizing. Blargle. You can make your decor look gothic without being flat out gross. XP
I'm sorry, but the look and coloring of the frosting in that second cake literally makes me feel ill. There is no way I'd eat that at anybody's wedding/party and I'm not one to ever turn down free food.
Uck!
Sad is what it is. Probably more of a commentary on our society, than the mere fact that they turn your stomach. Getting married isn't what it used to be I guess. Again, sad.
PS: Love your blog by the way!
I wish I was a life-insurance sales person at those events!
Skeletons with tongues - inappropriate.
My first thought was that these were for Dia de los Muertos, during which skeletons (usually of papier-mache) performing human activities like getting married are rampant. But that doesn't explain the eyeballs on the one cake or the photo of the couple with toe tags.
If I attended a wedding and saw that cake at the reception, I think I would leave. I hate skeletons and all that gory dead stuff.
THAT is why fruit filled cakes are just WRONG.
DO NOT WANT.
Actually, I see the second cake in a whole different light. (The dimmer, the better, by the way.)
What I imagine is an unbelievably sad scenario. The wedding of the couples' dreams was abruptly halted when a terrible tragedy (nuclear accident, deadly virus--you name it) wiped out the entire event--everybody.
That left the refreshments. A lovely cake with the gorgeously-gowned bride and her handsome, tuxedoed groom on top, flowers, a few attendants, etc. Waiting...waiting for the reception that never happened.
Years passed...
((SIGH))
except for the tongues i kinda like the top one. i am bothered by the fact that tongue would have long ago rotted away just like the other soft tissues did in addition to the esthetic of tongue kissing skeletons. but the rest of the cake is kind of cool.
all the other examples are truly ghastly wrecks though.
Ohhhhh. The last made me think of Miss Havisham. And maybe the first one, too, if the figures on the cake aged with her....
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miss_Havisham
After seeing these cakes all I can think about is how grateful I am that NO ONE I know would think these cakes were a good idea. At least I can rely on the fact I'll never have to encounter one of these wrecks in real life. The bleeding cake is absolutely disgusting. And a "death" theme for your special day? Sick!
Love the blog!
In Mexico (and other Central American countries?) they celebrate Day of the Dead...maybe these people got married on that day?? But still, ewwww on the toe tags.
Goths get wed too. Personally, I find it all icky.
So they have no soft tissues at all, being skeletons, but they still have tongues? Creepiness aside, that just plain doesn't make sense.
I have long suspected that these sort of wedding cakes may be the result of fights between a bride/groom who want to do things their own way and parents who are insisting they have a cake at their wedding.
Wow, that's pretty much just sick...esp. the one with the tag on the toe.
If you're getting married in Mexico (okay and maybe Texas) on the day of the dead, I can totally see this non-wrecky cake: http://farm1.static.flickr.com/238/520183524_8052e2b161.jpg?v=0
Other than that...just no.
oh man. the goths need help.
I quite like the first one! I mean, it has led me into an unpleasant mental tangent where I try and imagine how crappy skeleton kissing would be when all you have is teeth, skull and apparently freakishly preserved tongues to work with, but if they weren't kissing it would be kind of cool in a macabre black humour way.
The others I don't even like looking at. *shudder*
Okay, I don't get why the skeletons have TONGUES. They don't have eyeballs or hair ... but they have tongues?!
None of the cakes really bother me, though I wouldn't all say the're equally well executed.
The one that really gave me the shivers and declare, "noooo":
The fruit filled disaster! That's well and truly a wreck!
Just think how proud some of the undead cake makers would be to be able to actually make their cakes bleed on purpose!
Carry on Jen, you rock. :-)
sendingtheclowns said...
"The wedding of the couples' dreams..."
You idiot! That is a misplaced apostrophe! It is ONE couple.
Unless we include the other two couples--the best man, maid of honor, and the other two lying there (bridesmaid/groomsman).
Screw it; they're all still dead. Why quibble over punctuation at a time like this?
There are so many tacky wedding cakes, let the`morbid ones' have their own.
BUT: If you´re invited to such an event, what do you expect? cute kittens and fluffy unicorns??
I really thought the toe tag cake was cute. I did not think the first one was a wreck at all. It looked very nicely put together. Also the second one, while not my cup of tea, was very nicely worked and probably just what the couple wanted.
I think that calling them wrecks simply because you do not like the genre is wrong. But it is your blog so you have final say.
The one with the toe tag is just wrong. Like they died doing the deed. (shivers in horror)
The rest, I like!! LOL But I'm morbidly creepy that way.;)
~Amy B.
wow. I did not even get the toe tag one until you said "last embrace". I'd like to think that I still have a pure mind! :)
http://insertidiomhere.blogspot.com
If I had to chose one, I'd go with the first, minus the bugs. I don't mind the whole "til death" thing at weddings, but sometimes, It can be overkill.
Does anyone remember when Carmen Electra and Dave Navaro got married? They had a picture of them taken in a mourge, on the tables, be their invite!!
People do weird things
OMG, my daughter in law would have totally wanted one of these if she knew they existed!! She has a VERY macabre sense of humor.
I did their wedding cake and was put off enough by the fact that they insisted on chocolate inside and out. I would never have been able to bring myself to do dripping blood and skeletons even though the cake is white!
Skeletons with TONGUES?
Hate the wedding cakes with skeletons. You're not the only one. And fake blood? EW!!!!