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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Oct292008

The Spider Wreck Chronicles

Not long ago I told you all about a Wreckporter who was foiled in her attempt to photograph a spider Wreck. Since then many of you have sent in photos asking, "Was this it?". Of course I have no way of knowing, so we'll just have to ask Mrs. Tantrum. So, hey, Mrs. Tantrum, was this it?


For what it's worth, this one isn't TOO bad. Other than the fact that the legs are sprouting out of its face like whiskers, of course. And all that black frosting. And the disturbingly ambivalent mouth expression. And the fact that it's a CCC. Yep, not bad at all.

In fact, from what I've seen that is actually the most popular style of spider cake out there. Here are some more colorful models:

This one at least has its face in the right place (always a good thing), but I'm not sure what's going on in the mouth area. Plus, that Haunted gingerbread kit in the background is pure Wrecky gravy.

I would be remiss if I didn't include the steamrolled model:

Plus, yellow? Really? This looks more like a colorful dust mite, or maybe an alien brain with tubing attached, but a spider? No way.

Or how about this guy - or should I say 'girl'?

Sure, she looks more like a muppet with dreadlocks and a bald-spot than a spider, but she's so gosh-darn cute!

Speaking of dreadlocks...

Cha mon, dese be some hoppy Rasta spiders! They be jammin'. And really, have you ever seen pipe cleaners look so delicious?

Alyss H., Rebecca S., Valerie S., Katie M., and Tina F., tune in tomorrow for the terrifying conclusion to...

[dum dum da dummm] The Spider Wreck Chronicles.

« And Now the Conclusion of The Spider Wreck Chronicles | Main | Ghosts with the Most, Continued »

Reader Comments (127)

I wish I could get a good picture at our local store. We have some scary looking wrecks.

October 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterChezza

It's giving me a headache...

October 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline

i thought of your blog when i saw the top cake today at the store.

October 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMama

I happen to know that black icing turns your tongue deep blue. I bought Dad a cake that was supposed to be decorated to look like a speed limit sign for his 70th b'day.

They put too much black icing around the edge. Turned all the elderly aunties tongues blue. Strangly, it matched their hair.

So it wasn't a total bust based on entertainment value. And it was butter cream, yummy.

The last two cakes are too cute.

October 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHavocec

I've always thought black (and red) frosting had a really nasty taste from the coloring. Does anyone else notice that? I have had people tell me I'm crazy, but I swear that I can tell the difference in taste between black and, say, yellow, icing without seeing them.

So that all-black spider. ... yikes! That's one of the few cakes I could easily pass up.

October 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMiranda

This blog of yours wouldn't be nearly as hysterical if it weren't for your fantastic writing and stories behind the pictures!
Love it, keep it up!

October 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterA

very cute but I can't imagine wanting to actually eat anything those colors

October 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterechidna girl

The yellow one reminds me of a termite, no idea why.

The colourful one looks like Animal (the Muppet) going through a rebellious phase.

October 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMs Unreliable

OMGoodness! This is my first visit to this blog, and I about fell off my chair! This is just too much fun. I happen to like spiders, so it was appropriate to jump in on the SpiderWreck Chronicles. The cakes with 6-legged spiders were especially disturbing; why add insult to injury? Thanks for a wonderfully hilarious blog. I'll definitely be back!

October 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterscrappinfox

@cagey:
Um, TICKS are also arachnids and also have 8 legs, just like spiders and mites. Self-proclaimed experts should check their facts.
Alex

October 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Thank you!!

That's all I can type while laughing this hard....

October 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterQueenie Jeannie

I've tried using Firefox instead and just clicking on the picture, but it's telling me that the picture links themselves are of a pornographic nature and won't let me lookie at them. (Perhaps I shouldn't be looking at it at work, sigh...)

Hmmph. This sucks!

October 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKiera

Yes, I agree with the nasty taste of black frosting. I have found a wonderful welcome replacement for black food coloring (which, by the way, I never use anymore). I make my black frosting using Hershey's Special Dark Chocolate Cocoa. Turns out black every time, and tastes GREAT! No more bitter black frosting. Try it.

October 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCathy

The pink one is totally Grateful Dead, man.

October 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commentermanicpaniccomix

ok, the two year says . . . in order of appearance: cookie monster, elmo, big bird, hermie, and octopus . . .
perfect sense to me!

October 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdiddlesgirl

the snuffalupicus cake looks like chewbacca or maybe the nasty guy from pirates of caribean. or maybe a dark colored wraith.

October 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdiddlesgirl

um don't people know that spiders have 8 legs. i mean get real, at least give them 8 legs. so funny. the blog sure does make me look at the cakes in the grocery stores now.

October 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterColleen

OMG! I have a pair of earrings that look a LOT like the she-dreadlock spider!
And the last ones are adorable!

October 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKayƩ

Oh my gosh. A friend and I just laughed so hard, soda came out of our noses regarding the "rasta spiders..."

Thanks for the good laugh!

Happy Halloween!

October 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think I'm going into a sugar coma just seeing all the frosting on these. Ugh!!!

October 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJennyF

I'm just imagining the multiple panicked E.R. visits when one parent brought the black spider cupcake-cake to the class party and then the rest of the unsuspecting parents were frightened and surprised by the mysterious green poo that inevitably follows the eating of too much black frosting...

November 1, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKyra's Mama

@Miranda: Don't worry; you are not alone! Some people are, in fact, more sensitive to bitter flavors than others. Like me, for instance. I always hated store-bought cakes--no matter how nice they looked--because I tasted all the frosting colors, and it was naaaasty. So I agree--blech on that frosting!

November 1, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterFreezair

I'm with those who see Cookie Monster in the first cake. But to me, it's Cookie Monster assimilated by the Borg.



-- extrajoker

November 1, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love how that one cake looks like the head of Animal from the Muppets. Lol. I wonder what these bakers are thinking when they put so many colors of icing on one thing of cake.

January 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterockitty2003

That first spider's "mouth"...?

Words.

April 2, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCatherine Googleberry

The colourful spider, the red, green and yellow one, is good...even though I don't like spiders. Not sure i cud eat it...but to look at it is cool ;) x

October 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCupcakes Lady

The one with the haunted gingerbread in the back looks like the dog thing (Dougle?) from the Magic Roundabout.

Connected to the Matrix.

October 29, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCarrieVS

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