"Guest" "Post"
February 27, 2012 One of the joys/perils of writing a semi-popular website is the steady stream of unsolicited offers - often from questionable sources - to write guest posts.
Usually they go something like this:
"Dear Site Owner ,
I am a writer of excessive fame and sexual prowess who often takes pity on quaint sites like your own because I am also a fan. I especially enjoyed [insert yesterday's post title here], and found it quite informational.
For our mutual benefit, I am prepared to write a guest post for your site, provided you place my 150 by 120 ad in your sidebar, link to my LinkedIn profile, and tattoo my middle name inside a giant heart on your ass.
Please let me know how soon this can be arranged.
Signed,
IHaveAPillForThat
So just for kicks and giggles (and because we're all suffering from Oscar hangovers anyway) I figured I'd take this guy up on his offer. Today's post is the result.
"Enjoy."
;)
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Cake is a form of bread or bread-like food. In its modern forms, it is typically a sweet and enriched baked dessert. In its oldest forms, cakes were normally fried breads or cheesecakes, and normally had a disk shape.
;)
Determining whether a given food should be classified as bread, cake, or pastry can be difficult.
[photo]
;)
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Wreck was an indie rock band formed in Milwaukee, Wisconsin in 1988, and later based in Chicago. After releasing three albums the band split up in the mid-1990s, with singer/guitarist Dean Schlabowske going on to join The Waco Brothers.
;)
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Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Fusce sit amet ligula ut lacus rutrum vulputate sed non enim. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Sed pellentesque odio vitae lorem malesuada convallis. Suspendisse varius metus ut arcu scelerisque interdum. Morbi ut scelerisque nibh. Duis nulla purus, adipiscing non rhoncus a, consequat in dolor. Praesent luctus, urna vel congue tincidunt, elit ante vulputate metus, nec sagittis sem orci at sem.
;)
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Using an electric mixer, in a large bowl, beat butter with 1 cup sugar until light and fluffy. Add eggs and yolks, one at a time, beating well after each addition. Add vanilla; beat until combined.
Alternately add flour mixture and milk, beginning and ending with flour mixture; beat just until combined. Divide batter between prepared pans.
;)
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Reader Comments (64)
Haha!! I'm right there with you...I'm constantly getting \"offers\" to accept \"articles\" for our \"mutual benefit.\" (As if the readers of my humor blog really want to read a promotional post about the latest breast pump technology.) Just today I got an email asking if I would \"cover\" a spa event on my blog. One of the services they were promoting was \"color consolation.\" I can only assume this service involves stylists expressing sympathy for my terribly blah hair color, then giving me a hug and offering me several glasses of wine to ease my pain. At any rate, I think they can count me out on that one. I LOVED THIS POST!! Hysterical!
Smiles, Jenn @Misadventures in Motherhood
Pretty certain that I just entered the \"Twilight Zone\", not sure if I survived it yet or not.
\"Melt fat away with ancient secrets used by celebrities and the Knights Templar! \" Hahhahahaha, thanks so much, I needed a good laugh.
Have you thought about using the Bloggess' way of warding off unsolicited e-mails? I've heard it works! Haha.
http://thebloggess.com/heres-a-picture-of-wil-wheaton-collating-papers/
I have a feeling if I click those links I would be put in an alternate reality where wreckerators made sense lol. That just won't do at all so I will just happily read the comments instead. And gasp in horror at poor Marilyn Monroe or what is supposed to be her at any rate. Man wreckerators sure can ruin just about everything.
HILARIOUS!!!! Those who said it made no sense have obviously never had some type of public forum anyone can respond to or answered a shady Craig's List ad and then got the \"just send your money over seas\" email in return! I think this was one of my favorite posts ever and I've read them all :)
Looks like we came this close to an 'I don't get it' EPCOT. That's like a self-referential vortex -- a comic singularity. Once you drop below the event horizon, no jokes can escape.
Have you received anything from the 'Lint Of The Month' club, or was that just a scam? I wasn't sure, so I put 'cakewrecks dot com' where the application asks for a URL. I routinely do that with online offers -- I hope you don't mind. (JK)
Remember, it could be worse. Two words: Cat Facts.
Oh god it's already happening... spam bots and advertisers will soon begin creating the content themselves, depriving me of even the hope of a career.
I am awed at the amount of \"research\" and \"forethought\" that went into the amazing \"writing\" of this guest \"post!\"
(By the time the Latin filler text came around, I was laughing so hard I probably could have used a SexyWeightLossBeautyAcneMiracleCream pill...)
Andrea with sprinkles. Lucy in the sky with diamonds. Could there be a connection?
That Marylin Monroe cake is a wreck- but I have to give points to someone for even attempting it and getting that degree of success.
My. Freaking. Gosh. I've never commented in all my four years of fan-ship, but, I mean, WOW. This was so... hang on, gotta change my depends....
LOL - clicked them all - knew you wouldn't disappoint :)
Hey, I liked the Deb cake!