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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Jul062010

Sam's Club

Frequently, a bakery will receive a kit of plastic flotsam to construct a cakey character. This past week, the character of choice has been dear old Uncle Sam. Or at least, I think it has.

 

As a reminder, here's Uncle Sam:

 

Cake, you say? Your wish is my command, Sammy!

 

 

 

Pinstripes have never been more slimming.
Why, you can practically see right through him!

 


I was unaware that Uncle Sam had access to my grandfather's closet:

 

Remember: The higher you hike your pants, the more you love America!


Here Uncle Sam stars (and stripes) in "Red, White, and You!: A Musical"


Aaand...Jazz hands! Kick, ball, change... kick, ball, change...

 

 


Sweet Betsy Ross' ghost, are those cannonballs in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

 

Ug, I can't look at these wretched CCC's any longer. I need to see a real cake that actually looks somewhat like the famous personification of our Federal Government, Uncle Sam. C'mon, bakers!

 

 

A Shih Tzu wearing a popcorn bucket. Wow.
God Bless America.

 

 

You know, Asia P, Shelley B., Kayla T., Jordan J., and Beckie, that last cake could also be rock guitarist Buckethead, famous for shredding out tunes while sporting a Kentucky Fried Chicken bucket on his head. Hey, I smell a conspiracy! Or maybe just too much icing...

 

 

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Reader Comments (105)

I'm a cake decorator and when I need a truly hearty big belly laugh I come here to your site. I'm wiping tears from laughing so hard right now on the Shitz Tzu wearing a popcorn bucket. I knew I liked your humor; I love The Far Side too...
Susan J.

August 6, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I actually pee'd a little in my undies when I saw that last one! Wow, there are no words....only pee
-Amber

August 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmber

Dear Amber, when I read your post:
"Amber said...

I actually pee'd a little in my undies when I saw that last one! Wow, there are no words....only pee
-Amber
August 10, 2010 11:14 PM "

... it made me laugh 'til I cried... until... there was only pee. I did laugh at the Shih Tzu especially its spelling (my SIL has one of these 4-legged dustmops). Very funny but until your post, I swear only my own family has ever made me laugh so hard! Thank you for that, Amber!

Dear Jen, let me tell you why I love this blog so much! My sweet late Grandma and I had our own ongoing hideous cake story spanning over forty years, so these "wrecks" touch my heart. She would have loved them too. Often she and I would talk for hours long-distance and she had such great wit that there "were no words... only pee" and rather than hang up, we'd both put down the phone and go potty, then come back and talk and laugh some more. Thank you for reminding me of how very funny she always was. Makes me understand the meaning of "priceless".

Keep up the great laughs, Jen!

Love and hugs,
WD <3

November 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

On "pinstripes have never been more slimming"--
The pinstripes may have been slimming in the area they covered, but if you look directly above, Uncle Sam's rather creepy-looking muffin top reveals the truth: the pinstripes only "slim" you by repositioning those few pesky pounds.

February 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKatie C

I'd call dibs on Sam's
cakebrains, but guess who beat me
to it? Zombie-pup.

July 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

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