My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

When In Doubt, Blame Deadpool

Cassidy ordered this unicorn sheet cake:

Which looks simple enough - and mostly plastic - so how do you screw that up?

Oh, it's easy! Here, I'll walk you through it:

1) Throw the order photo away. Who needs guidelines when you've got raw artistic talent?

2) The next day, vaguely remember you're supposed to make a unicorn cake.

3) Desperately search the bakery for anything with a unicorn on it, throw it in the photocopier with a bunch of curling ribbon on top, and slap that on a sheet cake.

4) Realize your photocopied unicorn has a person riding it, so cover that up with icing "hair" that floats a full three inches about the unicorn's head.

5) Add some vaguely passive-aggressive punctuation for flair.




(Actually I have no idea what the hair is covering up; I just know it's covering SOMETHING. Personally I'm hoping it's Deadpool wielding a couple of battle axes, because that would be a hilarious. It's like the scratch-off card of cakes! SURPRISE!)

Thanks to Cassidy N. for the magic.


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Reader Comments (11)


September 6, 2018 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

You've seen wonky alligators and poo-wang turkeys,
Things that pass for llamas and some sick monkeys.
There's bats and rats and elephants for us all to scorn,
And then there's the cakes that pass for unicorns.

(Apologies to the Irish Rovers)

September 6, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMike

Hey, the store manager's cousin (I never get to talk to the actual manager) said they couldn't get the Mohawk baby off the plastic carrot in time for pickup, okay?

September 6, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterAl the K

I would be scraping that frosting mane off immediately - just to see! LOL

September 6, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterCami

Anything that results in a lot of extra icing = good.

September 6, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterBea

Good grief. I think even I ( a person with zero artistic ability) could possibly have re-created the inspiration cake.

September 6, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterAddie

My first thought was 80's hair, but the bangs aren't big enough. Maybe more of a "Hairspray" unicorn.

September 6, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

Just because the unicorn has a really bad mane toupee is no reason to pic on him.

September 7, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMindy Q

........Still waiting for that magic to kick in. =^o.0^=

September 7, 2018 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns =^-.-^=

That is a very strange image. My best guess is that's some other customer's image, and that customer wouldn't accept the cake when they saw how ugly it was. The bakery "upcycled" it to fill the new order and cut their losses.

September 8, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterChristopher

This is a new level of decorating apathy... why, I remember when bakers cared enough about their work that they'd at least print out the reference photo itself & put that on the cake...

September 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterNerfbomb

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