My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

How 'Bout Them 'Melons?

And now, let's add a little class with a traditional haiku.

Ahem hem hem.


Watermelon cake?


Sure, let me ask the baker.




Apparently not.


Thanks to Katie T., Michelle L., Shanna P., & Tharry for the seedy entertainment.


Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

And from my other blog, Epbot:

« Anything You Can Wreck, I Can Wreck Better | Main | When Wrecks Go Historically Wrong »

Reader Comments (18)

The first cake looks like something that's been in the back of my refrigerator for months. And the first and second cakes make we wonder, were these bakers modeling their cakes from a new hybrid watermelon that has a very thick rind and almost no fruit?
The third one breaks almost all known rules of reproduction. Aren't the sperm supposed to swim toward the egg? It looks as if all these were scared off, or Ms. Egg rejected all suitors.
I know in our town we have the supposed "square beyond compare" pizza, but a square watermelon? Maybe it was grown in a box to give it that shape. That still doesn't explain the sperm swimming in formation. Maybe they're about to make an army brat.

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMike

Ode to Extra Savings (Autobiographical)

That's a huge white rind
And some massively large seeds
Maybe picked too soon?

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterAngelaS

From that title (and my dirty mind) I thought this would be about another category of cakes :P

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterFrancisco

Well, I guess you can't say "nice melons" to these bakers. :P

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

The last one is the best.

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterTara

Apparently years ago watermelons were more white than red inside. I don't know how many years ago this was, but I saw a picture of it somewhere.

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterClaire

I like the third cake! I would call it a honeydew melon cake. OR, a watermelon cake. There ARE non-red watermelon out there!

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

Cake 3 is "baked with pride"

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered Commenterrumcake

All the "seeds" look like deformed sperms!

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterJackie

That first one is what the bakery saw and said, "I can do that," right? Because I can't imagine anyone decorating a cake to look like that.

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

Q: What do watermelons like to do when they get home from a hard day at work?

A: They like to sit down and un-rind.

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered Commenter3davideo

I like the third cake too. You could hang it on the wall as a picture.

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMaryO1230

I see: ladybug,
Lamprey, cucumber, bedsheet.
But melons? Not here.

July 18, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterSeabird

Does anyone here know the term vagina dentata ? That is what I think of when I look at the second cake, and possibly the third.
I have seen bright yellow watermelons. This from Wikipedia: "The rind of the fruit is mid- to dark green and usually mottled or striped, and the flesh, containing numerous pips spread throughout the inside, can be red or pink (most commonly), orange, yellow, green or white."

July 19, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterAlison in Indiana

There are actually square watermelons (made by letting a young watermelon grow in a square glass container, I think), but the last one is still poorly done.

July 19, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterR.

I don't think the wreckerators would know a nice melon if it bit them on the butt lol. Oh that would probably give them scarier ideas lol.

July 20, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

Middle one Looking great.

July 20, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterRan

I thought the same thing, @ Francisco. I thought we were going to see "huge tracts of land" in cake form.

July 20, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterCali Kath

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